am I wrong to be angry?

[saywhat]

a bunch of us were supposed to hang out at a friends house, with my bf meeting us there. Then he calls and says change of plans, he's having a "guys night" so he can't come. Well I'm normally ok with that cuz its usually him and his guy friends hanging out, but tonite I find out that most of the guys he hangs with aren't even with him, and he's at someones house and there are some girls there who go after everyone, even if they are in a relationship. So I'm pissed. Then he gets pissed because he says I'm spying on him trying to find out what he's doing. (I only found out accidently, I wasn't spying) He acts like I'm at fault for being mad and that he did nothing wrong, and maybe he didn't but I still feel like he lied to me. A guys nite to me is guys, not guys and other girls. Am I wrong? He's making me feel like I should be the one that's sorry, not him.

[Mythical_Suicide]

You're not wrong at all sweety, He lied to you when he left out the details of it not just being "guys night out". My bf and I have this same problem, he doesn't see a problem with it but I do so we are now in conflict because of this same exact reason. No reason for you to be sorry.

[annie24]

welcome to enotalone. wow, I would be mad too! he's only mad at you because you caught him in his lie. He doesn't sound like a good guy. how long have you been dating? has he done this before?

[Batya33]

In addition to the lie, how many times has he cancelled at the last minute without a true emergency?

[Daligal83]

I'm with the others. He's trying to blame you so that his lie isn't the focus. He definitely did lie to you though, and his blaming you doesn't make any sense since you said yourself that you found out by accident. I think you need to have a talk with him and let him know that it is unacceptable and the quickest way to lose you (if that's how you feel).

[DN]

and there are some girls there who go after everyone,

First: how do you know they go after everyone?

 

second: do you trust your boyfriend? Has he cheated before? Or have you a strong suspicion that he has cheated?

 

third: if you do not trust him - does he know that you don't? Has that distrust been an issue in the past?

 

If you think he lied to you then if you want the relationship to continue you need to know why he found it necessary to lie.

[EvaGina]

gah

people think they are so clever when they "cover their tracks" like that.

He COULD have just said that he felt like hanging with his mates without his girlfriend there... but no, he has to try make it some male bonding thing that you cant contest without looking like a cow.

 

He got caught lying... not cool... DONT let him turn this into your fault.