Best Friend Killed In Iraq...

[bravegirl04]

My best friend was killed in Iraq on Saturday...i never thought this day would come. This man did everything for me, he gave me money when i needed it, took me out to expensive restaurants, took me shopping, bought me a new cell phone just because i wanted one, when my son was born and i wasnt working, he gave me money to get him food and came and helped me with the baby. But most of all, he gave a me a shoulder to cry on when i was down. This guy had such a big heart, if you just met him, within 5 minutes he would have you laughing and having a good time. We had such a strong relationship..we had an intimate relationship but were not together, but we did not mind because we both knew that there was nobody out there that could do the things that we did for eachother.

While he was in Iraq (he was only there for 2 months before he died), i would write him, send him care packages with candy and home baked cookies...i did everything i could to get him thru this tough time. He told me that no other female had did the things that I did for him. That is something i will hold dear for the rest of my life.

Right now i am really angry with myself. We would chat online on the instant messenger almost everyday, and he would tell me how he almost got killed that day and he was scared. I said to him "promise me you will come home safely?" he said..."Jess dont worry im not anywhere near close to danger, im coming home i promise"..had i known that was the last time i would ever speak to him, i would of told him how much i loved him. Instead i just said "im going to bed ill talk to you later"...he kept buzzing me but i just ignored him.

I am going to his funeral so say my goodbyes, but i still feel so empty. I wish i could of been on good terms with him before he died. Im so scared to sleep at night because i think hes going to come to me in my dream. How do i get thru this tough time? What keeps me going is knowing that God makes no mistakes, and it was a blessing that God called someone with a big heart home into his kindgdom...but still i feel so empty and i just want him to know how much i loved him and how good of a friend he was...

[Fallout]

Sorry to hear about your loss...that shows exactly why wars are bs...

 

Why say you weren't on good terms with him? From your post it seems you were...even if you had a fight that day it doesn't matter, what matters is you two loved eachother

[bebecole]

it takes time, my bestfriend died in a car accident in june. And i know exactly how you feel. its weird sleeping at night alone. try and sleep with the door open and the tv on.

its goin be rough but day by day you will come to terms with it.

its all part of the process.

My boyfriend is in the marines and i fear for his life as well, and i know exactly how you feel. if you need to talk more you can PM me.

[Bethany]

Nobody know what the future holds. IF you had knows what was going to happen, of course you would have told him. But you didn't, because you believed in him when he reassured you and you went to bed content and carried on despite your fears. There's nothing wrong with that.

 

You were not to know, please don't feel guilty. Say your goodbyes with peace of mind. Don't let this spoil your memories of him.

[itsallgrand]

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss.

 

Reading your post, the love exudes. I really got a sense of how special this man was and how much you love him. He does not sound like the type of man to blame others or take things for granted. He knew you loved him.

 

May you find peace.

[AwdreeHpburn]

bravegirl - I am sorry for your tragic loss.

 

I'm sorry to hear you feel empty and guilty. The loss of someone we care about often makes us feel those things even WHEN we Do say our, I love yous and hearfelt feelings.

 

It's tragic and very sad but you will have so much of him with you daily.

 

condolences.....

[Chibby33]

bravegirl, what you can do is send him a final IM or email and release all your feelings for him. Although he's no longer with us, go ahead and give him gratitude for all the things he has done for you and your child. It's never too late.

[Shadows Light]

AWWWwwwwwwww sweetie.... ((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))

 

I'm so sorry for your loss. So very very very sorry. What a special man!!! you are so lucky to have had him in your life, remember him and cherish your memories.

 

He knew you loved him.... LOVE is not just words. Anyone can say, "I LOVE YOU" .. LOVE is actions. It the actions that speak the loudest. Its all the care packages that you sent him. The time you took to bake him home-made cookies. Everytime you logged on to talk to him.. that spoke volumes. He Knows you love him.

 

Don't be afraid to sleep... don't be afraid to see him. If you do... then tell him whats in your heart, because he already knows. He knows you love him.... and he loves you very very very much. Actions speak louder than pretty words. Always.

 

My heart goes out to you and your child. Remember him well... and remember that he loved you and his country so much, he risked all to keep us all safe. He was a brave man, an honorable man. May the light of all the angels who've gone before him light his way home. God Bless you and keep you safe.

 

Siempre Fidelis

[Cid]

I know how you feel I also lost a frend in Iraq he was killed on my birth day 2 years ago, then my gf at that time got sent over there. So I know how you feel. If you need someone to talk to just pm me.

[Spugly Fuglet]

He was a good and brave man, the world needs more like him, I am sorry for the worlds and your loss. *hug* all I can say is hes life ment some thing, he stud for some thing and in deeds make the world a better place.

That above all other things makes his life a life well lived.