What is going on in their mind???

[Lion-Guy]

Why do EXs who broke up with you continue to send short e-mails and say Hi? I have made no contact with her.

 

It has been a year now since I have seen my ex and I still get a e-mail every few months such as:

 

"I saw your brother the other day or I like your new web photos. Hope you are doing well. "

 

I have been ignoring the few messages, but just wondering what our Exs are thinking? Any thoughts or experiences?

[pacopaco]

I can't help you there. I get the same things. I can say this- don't tear yourself up over it. I would rather not ask "why is she doing this." it's more like "who cares!"

[Shadows Light]

Well... maybe they think just because the "RELATIONSHIP" didn't work doesn't mean you have to throw the baby out with the bath water. You two maybe able to salvage a friendship... or at least remain on good terms.

[Dako]

The dumper sometimes thinks it's a kindness, even when it's not.

You could add her to your spam list.

[Shadows Light]

DAKO... don't add me to your spam list.. I'd be crushed.. lol.

 

I guess its all in the way you look at it... perspective. Some people can remain friendly.. and some can't.

[motog]

perhaps they do it to say to themselves "hey im not really a bad person" if my ex is happy now then what i did was right, and away goes my guilt?

stay safe

[Gold Hawk]

Guilt??? I suppose. Maybe they've just moved on and gotten passed it. Some people are just not compatible. I've long since thanked past BF's for our wonderful break-ups. We didn't fit... we didn't fit. Would I have rather that they stuck with me even though their feelings didn't run the same course as mine??? No.. of course not. Does me a dis-service as well as themselves. You can't make a silk purse out of a sows ear.

[amb1873]

I keep in touch with two of my exes via email and it's actually very nice. I think this is only possible when the BOTH of you have moved on and realize that the relationship was not meant to be. I'm having a hard time right now because I'm trying to speed up the time to get over him in order to be his friend and it's just not working. Either you can or you can't- but if it makes you feel weird or awkward or hurts you in any way then by all means look out for #1. You don't owe her a friendship but there are benefits to being friends with people you have let into your life before.

[rightfromthestart]

is this finally the year the leafs win the cup? could it be!

[Lion-Guy]

Thanks guys. You all make good points. It does kind of sound like she still has guilt for dumping me. Oh well, you have to deal with the consequences of your decisions.

 

I wish I had the ability to let her back into my life as a friend but there has just too much hurt involved. Hopefully one day I will accept the fact that she was not for me and look past all that hurt. I haven't reached that point yet. This past year I have just worked on improving myself, ignoring any of her messages and avoid running into her at all cost.

[GottaLetItBurn]

perhaps they do it to say to themselves "hey im not really a bad person" if my ex is happy now then what i did was right, and away goes my guilt?

stay safe

 

never though about it that way really, maybe had that concept in the back of my mind somewhere. Nice, it's true what your saying I believe.

 

That makes sense to me. Why can't they take a hint from being ignored. Doesn't the thought cross their mind.."They are ignoring me cause I hurt them, maybe I shoud just leave them alone and move on".

 

I think if they are looking to relieve guilt they know they were wrong. WHo wants a reminder of a painful past heartbreak.