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Memory problems.


thirdeye
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Guys,

 

I have some major problems:

 

1) Memory : Time and again this has let me down. Right from my school examinations to my job interviews now. I would read stuff and then when I am actually being asked about that I totally forget things or I am not confident of answering. I don't know why, whether it is motivation or whether it is reading with concentration that could have made the difference. I can understand things and learn , but I tend to forget it. The peculiar part is I can remember events , movie scenes , pictures etc very well. I still remember some events that happened in my childhood. Yes I know the theory that some events hold a special place in the mind and it will stay forever. But I really want to improve my memory power when it comes to remembering concepts , fundamentals and the like. When the basics are missing, then how would I grasp indepth knowledge.

 

2) Poor concentration: My concentration is very poor at times. Especially when I am studying. This could be possibly be one of the reasons why I can't retain things. Why is my Concentration poor I don't know.

 

3) Don't know what I want to do and I am totally confused

I know I have the potential to do things. But how do I really bring that out.

 

I am a software professional, but forget what code I need to write.

I hate me in this stage of life. My wife has so much of trust on me that I can do well. But with so many weak areas , howwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww?

 

 

Can someone help me come out of this dreadful situation.

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Hi Thirdeye,

 

I develop SW too.

 

Perhaps you would want to undergo a detailed medical examination.

 

Does this help?

 

ADHD Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

The symptoms of ADHD include inattention, impulsiveness and hyperactivity that are inappropriate for a person's age level.

 

Children who have ADHD often

  • Are easily distracted by sights and sounds in their environment.
  • Are unable to concentrate for long periods of time on low stimulation tasks (homework vs. video games).
  • Are restless and impulsive.
  • Have a tendency to daydream.
  • Are slow to complete tasks.

Adults who have ADHD often

  • Miss work deadlines.
  • Miss appointments.
  • Appear hectic and disorganized.
  • Have significant problems prioritizing.

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I think you should get examined by a specialist. They will have you perform on cognitive tests, and see if this is a medical condition of some sort. The memory can be trained by doing exercises, in Holland I know there are a few books on that. My grandfather has trouble with his memory (it's old age in his case), and he sort of keeps track by writing little notes here and there. Try to check the tab with books on this page, or amazon to find these booklets, they contain little puzzles and exercises you could daily and that will keep stimulating your brain. But in the first place, get yourself to a doctor.

 

Ilse

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What type of doctor would be helpful in this case? A psychiatrist?

 

As a matter of fact. I feel this has made a dig difference in my life.

I am always worried. I am always confused. I am always lazy.

As i mentioned earlier, its only a few things I can remember very well.

 

But I tend to forget a lot of important things. That just dents my confidence level. This keeps happening to me time and again. I always wanted to postpone tests or exams. I would have ample time to study , but just didn't do it.

Thats discipline. I really wasted valuable time in life. I can't do that anymore.

I a 28 now. I don't have a proper sense of time management.

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You are quite young to be experiencing this kind of stuff I think, I think it's best to first go to your primary physician and discuss the options. I am no medical expert, so I cannot diagnose you. Usually browsing or googling these kind of things makes you more worried than you ought to be

 

Just make an appointment with him, he will refer you to the correct specialist.

 

Ilse

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Hello, you mention you are insecure when you answer, that can lead to a damaging cycle which is one of the main causes of memory problems, you don't believe you can do it, you fear you won't do it right, you fail, and next time you begin you remember that you don't believe you can do it.

 

You also mentioned lack of concentration, it can interfere that you don't trust your memory ("I'm studying but surely I won't learn") but there are surely many other things your mind is doing, you have to pay attention to what those are and tell yourself you'll deal with them later.

 

Memory, like all mind issues have to be controlled by YOU, imagine it's like your car, it won't do anything unless you tell it to, and if the road is difficult you have to really focus on making the car work for you.

If your brain or thoughts are left to wander around you're the one that has to put order, limits.

 

Assuming your problem is not due to anything physical just meditate a lot (leave your mind blank, concentrate on how you are breathing) that will help you in dealing with all sorts of thoughts.

And tell yourself your memory is great, but use different resources for learning, not just reading, maybe say things out loud or visualize them too.

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Why am I so worried always? You are right. My lack of memory is affecting my concentration and my lack of concentration is again affecting my memory. Its a cycle. I get locked up with some worry or the other.

 

I have tried to ask questions on the purpose of my life, what do I want to achieve ultimately and what should I be working on? I don't know what I am really strong at. Whether it is programming or people management.

 

I am technically not weak in my subjects, but I am mentally weak.

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I also have a terrible memory and astonishingly poor concentration skills.

 

When it comes to rote memorization of something I typically do very poorly no matter how hard I try and there's little I've been able to do. When I am up to myself as to what I need to remember, I carry a small notepad and write things down. I keep lists, and record things in spreadsheets and data bases.

 

As for concentration, I find listening to music I already know well will allow me to block out other things. My concentration is so poor just about any noise will completely break me out of my thought cycle. The music actually masks out most of the other noise and in addition gives my brain something to do and since it's familiar music, subconsciously I already know what to expect so no active thought appears to be engaged in the listening process.

 

In other words, I need crutches to help me. Perhaps there are some other things that can be done to help, but these types of things really assist me.

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Why am I so worried always? You are right. My lack of memory is affecting my concentration and my lack of concentration is again affecting my memory. Its a cycle. I get locked up with some worry or the other.

 

I have tried to ask questions on the purpose of my life, what do I want to achieve ultimately and what should I be working on? I don't know what I am really strong at. Whether it is programming or people management.

 

I am technically not weak in my subjects, but I am mentally weak.

 

Focus is the goal. You ask yourself what you are better at, programming or people management, well, you have to go and do a little of both to have an answer that can give you the benefit of facts.

If you only think about it your experience will be a bit limited. Now, let's say you can't go and try those things (or others) and you do need to make a decision, then you have to see the pros and cons then stick to the best option.

 

Certain thoughts are not productive and only repetitive, but there really is little point questioning everything beforehand, worrying too much ahead won't make your present better as you already know.

 

Just pay attention to what you want, sit down, write the possible options, conclude and don't open the subject again until a result is there.

 

Things will still be fine even if you end up making a bad decision, and you'll learn something.

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I am technically not weak in my subjects,

Aha, I wish you remember that and tell yourself 10 times per day.

but I am mentally weak.

I don't think so and others reading your posts will agree.

 

Historically you may have been a bit complacent and have low confidence. Your mind will have adapted to yourself.

 

Your mind will adapt to your new wishes as well, be patient and persistent as a biochemical computer takes a little time.

 

A journal (here - there is now a journals forum) may be good for you.

 

What does your gf tell you about yourself?

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Well My Gf(wife) says that I have lot of potential in me. Even I feel that I have , but then why do I forget things and why do I fail in interviews? Why do I feel that I am weak. I hate to make such comments but sometimes I feel like a loser.

I have to change a lot of things in myself.

More thoughts on this are welcome.

 

I will update the events happening to me as well.

 

Thanks everyone.

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Actually, I felt like a loser too a while ago. Reasons likely different, but it was fixable after all.

 

You have a supportive wife, which is great.

 

I feel you improved since your first post last month. Not bad.

 

Work on yourself and manage yourself, do not be couch potato again, you will progress.

 

Yes, you likely have to change as only change is cure. If you like, have a look at my work in progress for some ideas:

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, I have indicated the memory problems I have.

 

I am trying out certain things in life.

I am trying to achieve something.

I work for a software firm and my timings are like , for 1 week I go early in the morning (6:00 AM to 2:30 PM)

and the other week is (2:00 to 10:30).

Its not a great job, I mean , not much of learning, a support kind of a role. I feel i am losing my skillsets.

 

In the month of Jan , I started a software firm , called as ThirdEye Solutions and Technologies. My friend AnanthaShayana is my partner in that and works fine and works full time here. Ofcourse he could much better.

I have a good client in US and I have 4 guys working for me.

I have the ambition to make this big as I am working, but I lack the drive , I lack the fire power. I waste a lot of time in my office when I can work on my skill sets. I just sit and gossip with friends. Even at home lot of time gets wasted. Yes I do spend time with my firm.

If I actually look back at my day which has just passed by I have not used it constructively.

 

Now I really need some time management tips. I need to make sure that every minute counts.

 

This is one part.

 

The second part is something which I already discussed.

My memory is not bad when it comes to remembering movie names , events relating to that movie, life events , past events. But I can't remember the commands in computer terminology, can't remember a formula for Earnings per share.

Why does this happen? My memory is confusing me.

I am very inconsistent.

 

Please help.

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You are similar to me, your mind is associative and creative. Training helps, I switched to GNU/Linux in 2000, use the command line a lot and got much better at remembering over the years. I am not that great though.

 

Discipline is good for time management. Prioritize and do not let anything distract you, chatting in particular. Chatting too much (in your biz) is also bad for work morale!

 

Honestly, Trust yourself more, motivate yourself in small steps. Involve your wife more, explain to her you want her to watch over you as a kind of auxiliary manager.

 

And post more often here or start a journal (here in Journal forum). We read and encourage you!

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  • 1 month later...

I am really not happy with my progress. I am no different from what I was and there is still a big gap. I want to do a few things with devotion but just not getting motivated or something keeps coming in the middle.

My time management is really bad. I could be more organised but I am very casual.

 

Here are the things I want to do.

 

1) Improve my fitness level for which I have to work out. I am not doing this.

 

2) Improve my mental fitness for which I have to meditate but I am not doing it.

 

3) I want to improve my skill level and knowledge for which I have to study, read and work hard. I am not doing this.

 

4) I want to finish off all pending things , but I am not doing this and I keep procastinating.

 

5) Want to organise myself better. Something stops me from doing this.

 

So here is how it goes. I have a list of things I want to work on , but just do not have the motivation to do so. I know that if I am able to work on these I will make good progress.

Can anyone tell me whats going wrong with me. I should know myself better than anyone else.

But only a mentor can guide me in the right way. I found this site a good guide for life.

F1 please.

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