Help!! Am I going over the edge???

[therookie]

Hi!

 

I'll try to make this as short as possible...

 

I work part-time at a group home doing maintenance. There's this girl who works there who I really like, but she's 10 years younger than me, (she's 18).

 

I've been there about a year. I've never asked her out because of the age difference, (though I've wanted too!)

 

I know she likes me, I believe. She doesn't talk much to me, but does a lot to the residents and her fellow female emplyees. She might say a couple sentences to me, but that's about it.

 

Being the nice guy I am, her graduation came up, and I gave her card, along with $50. When I called the group home the next day, her mother answered, (her mother works there too!) and she said that Samantha was excited and said thank-you very much!

 

When I saw her a couple days later at work, she thanked me for the card.

 

Things were going good for awhile, she would talk to me a little more, say "Bye" when I was leaving, etc...

 

I just got back from a 2 week vacation, and when I saw her this past Tuesday, I said "HI!, nice to see you, I missed you!" She just nodded her head a little, with no remark. She then got a phone call, and ALL i heard her say at first was, "What, are you just being nosy?" (I think she was talking with her mother about us!) She then went downstairs to continue to talk on the phone!!

 

On Wednesday, I stopped by for work again, and she didn't even talk to me! She talked to veryone but me, so I just did my work. When 8 p.m. came, her assistant who she chats with (she's in her 60's!) left for the day. The residents went to bed, so it was just me and her. I sat in the front room on the couch, repairing a table. She sat in the kitchen, facing the room I was in, and read a book at a counter.

 

We didn't speak!

 

She started to slouch in her chair, (no eye contact, no talking!) then the next thing I knew, she was gone from the room.

 

I completed my job, when to clean up, then went to look for the vaccuum. I saw her sitting on the couch in the front room, by herself, just blankley staring. She didn't look at me, or say anything. I gathered my tools together, and left.

 

Just yesterday I saw her and asked if she was ok. She said, Yeah, just doin my paperwork!" She never really talked to me, so I went about my work. I saw her in the kitchen sitting at the counter doing some paperwork, so I thought I'd just go over and give her a small affectionate squeeze on her shoulders with my hands.

 

She said, "Don't touch me!!!". I was embarrased and dumbfounded. I gathered up my tools and left!!!

 

What did I do wrong? Why do I feel so awful? Should I just ignore her, or perhaps avoid her altogether? I really like her, ALOT!

 

Where did I go wrong?

[arwen]

I don't think you did anything wrong, but you might have misread her in the past. On the other hand, she might just have been surprised by the sudden touch. The age thing might play a role as well, she is very young still, and might be unexperienced with men. Take it slow and don't touch her when she doesn't see it coming. People are different in that respect, some of us are not comfortable being touched by people we don't know very well.

 

Ilse

[JJRadical]

BiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiG MISTAKE on your part...touching a female before she touches you first should be left to the Zen Masters only...card w/$50 for her graduation...who are you her grandfather...10 years is no big deal unless she's like 18 and your 28 and even then its plausible...you just need a few lessons in communicating with the opposite sex and you'll be ok...

[JJRadical]

Oh yea...avoid her...you done...

[Süsser Tod]

I think she may like you, that is why she had such a strong reaction, however, she may not be single or may have something else going in her life that is taking her mind away of you.

[Daddy Bear]

sorry, i don't get what she did to make you think that you had permission to put your hands on her. a "small affectionate squeeze" is a BIG deal.

 

in fact, i don't hear anything that proves to me that she likes you at all. maybe you should apologize and not try it again.

[TheRedQueen]

It sounds like you are deluding yourself in your unsubstantiated belief that this girl reciprocates your feelings. She has shown you no signs of even potential interest. It was a violation on your part for touching her, you should apologize to her then keep your distance.

[itsallgrand]

You have now become the creepy guy she has to work with. What were you thinking??

 

Apologize and keep a respectful distance from her. You're done. You have no shot.

 

So might as well learn for next time! Rule Number 1: no picking up women or girls at group homes. Big NO NO. Jeeez. That is people's homes! It's not only her and you that have to live with the discomfort now.

 

Maybe you can transfer to a new place? You may see her disappearing soon. I know I'd transfer her.