just wanted 2 let you all know iam dying tonight

[NikE-ElitE]

hey if you want to post i might still be here, if i dont then you know iam gone

just when my life seemed to just starting to brighten it all folds back to black

iam so sick of this... its not worth living just to * * * *ing deal with all these * * * *ing problems time and time again. there is a gun about an arms length away from me i will use it on my head after i give my ex all my atheletic awards which are all patheticly of no importance i dont even know why iam doing this, this will make a good conversation tomarow at school, one one will see it coming how could somone so seemingly strong fall, he cant fall they say

this should cause people to think of the pain and demons i deal with,.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

[arwen]

Hey Nike,

 

What happened that you feel your life has folded back to black?

 

Ilse

[Dako]

You know you won't hear the talk at school tomorrow, or anything else for that matter. Does your ex want your awards, or does she want to even talk to you? My ex is currently throwing much of my stuff away. I doubt she'd want anything of mine. Since I got over her, I threw lots of her stuff in the trash.

What kind of gun are you using tonight?

 

The reason I ask is that I hope you don't have a gun handy.

There's enough pain in the world, and your friends and family shouldn't get any extra. In fact, you don't deserve the pain you're in right now.

 

Take a breath, stick around. There are better times ahead.

 

I've been in your shoes, but you don't have to suffer.

Be good to yourself.

 

You need to talk to a coach to help you do something other than play sports. You need some help with living. There are plenty of people who do that, but not if you take the big exit.

[coollady1957]

You mentioned that things were becoming brighter and then faded back to black. What happened to cause things to spiral downward again?

I hate that you are dealing with so much pain, and demons in your life.

You are young and under alot of pressure , which I can understand with all your athletics, school, parents and family life, and girlfriends. YOu are not alone. There are so many young and old that deal with lifes obstacles, that are seemingly not worth living for at times. There would be so many people I am sure that would be horribly hurt if you took your life. IT would love so many people in your life asking WHY WHY WHY? Is there some one you can confide in , a teacher, a coach, an adult that you are close to in some way ?

YOu have so much ahead of you that you can enjoy if you just get some help dealing with your problems. I hope you reconsider what you are contemplating doing to yourself. Keep posting to us here. We all have concern for you.

[Scout]

I second what Dako and Coollady are saying. I also urge you not to inflict this pain on your family. All I could think about reading your post was that I have a nephew your age, and he's also very well-respected in school and sports. For all I know, you could be him. You have no idea how it would sadden me and my family for the rest of our lives if he left us. It would destroy my sister (his mom) and I know that you don't want to cause such pain to your family. Please, no matter how much you hurt now, know that you have the strength to make a positive change in your life. Y

[Itsok]

Friend, there is never a good reason to fold in this life.

 

Have courage, there are better times ahead if you hold on a little longer...

 

We all hit very difficult times in life where it feels like we just can't take anymore. When we endure them, when we get through, we are victorious.

 

Giving up is of no benefit to anyone. You can make it through friend, everyone is cheering you on!

 

May peace of mind fill you this night, and offer you the comfort you so need and deserve before you make this horrible mistake that can never be undone.

[GNR4ever]

this isnt something ive discussed with many people. i felt like you do now for a long time. like you, i wanted to die. i attempted to commit suicide... by taking pills. i didnt take enough... when my parents found me i was still alive, but barely. i was rushed to the hospital to have my stomach pumped and receive treatment. now, things have improved. it seemed at the time that they never would, but they did. now i feel so lucky to be alive, so glad that i didnt die. not that my life is near perfect now, but it is better and i have learned to come with what problems come my way.

the VAST majority of people who survive their own suicide share these feelings. they are glad to be alive.

your life will imrove with time. learn ways to cope with your problems. i learned astral projection. i highly reccomend it, and think that you should read up on it on the internet. using it, with practice, you can escape to anywhere in this world or another for as long as you need. but dont try to escape this world forever by killing yourself.

please dont do this.

[calgaryguy]

Oh * * * * man , dont do that , why would you want to do that to your family? your friends? Its really a very easy and weak way out. Be strong mang we can help you through this. If you ned someone to talk to you can call me or i can call you doesnt matter. Just relax man.

[keep_it_movin]

Dear Nike,

 

I am no counselor, but I do know that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

 

I was feeling similarly just weeks ago... And like you, I reached out on the Internet. Fortunately, I found the following site to be the first of many that helped me through the feelings that felt like they would never end...

 

link removed

 

Please spend the time to read more about the feelings you are experiencing. You are not alone.

 

There are many years of brighter days ahead of you. Please read the messages on this board... you are surrounded by help, support, and encouragement. I'm now surrounded by beautiful and rewarding days, and I promise the same will happen for you! You are not alone!

[Bethany]

It won't be an interesting conversation topic tomorow. It will be the end of your parents life. Their child will be dead. I cannot even imagine how I would feel if my son did what you are thinking of.

 

I would hope that he would have talked to me, or talked to someone so I or they could help him. I would hope that he would open up and tell me how he was feeling and what he couldn't cope with anymore so I could support him and try my best to help him. Please give people who love you that chance. Who knows who will find you in such a terrible state. I can't even bear to think about that, please don't do it.

 

There is always a way out of your problems, all you have to do is stick around and search for it. There will be no end to your problems by leaving this world. You create bigger and more horrendous ones for the people who love you. You can't turn back and see the pain and misery your suicide brings and you don't get another chance at life not even to come back and say your sorry for that you have done. Please don't do it.

 

Talk to us, talk to someone you trust in real life.Tell them, tell us what it is you can't cope with anymore and we can help. Someone can help you deal with this. You don't have to face it alone. You are NOT alone.

 

BTW- That site is excellent.

[NikE-ElitE]

i cant cope with all the pressure and pain weather it be from trying to continue being a perfect athelte which may seem like a problem people would like to have(trust me it eats your mind from the inside out) or dealing with a girl that iam so crazy and cant stop thinking about, those are a couple of my seemingly minor problems but when you live them to the extreme extent that i have they are overwhelming impossibly overwhelming and it seems somtimes the only peace i get is when i sleep, i try to follow the teachings of the christ but it seems whenever a problem occurs it always brings this soul which presents itself as an unstopable force to its knees. There is a fifty percent chance i will be to tiered tonight to continue on tonight and theres a chance i will do what i have done before go lift weights till iam to tired to crawl and i close my eyes fall asleep on the floor and wait till tomarrows demons return to do battle with me... please somone tell me how to cope iam almost ready to die(about a foot from the edge and cant take another blow) please somone help me i want to look back on this and look at it as another competitor that i laid to waste in my wake.

[arwen]

Hey Nike,

 

First of all, if the pressure of being an athlete is too high, don't do it. I get the impression that you are a very intelligent guy, who demands far too much from himself. Your problems are not minor. Problems of the heart are very heavy to carry around. So tell us about this girl. Is this someone you are friends with, and does she know how you feel?

 

These demons you say you need to battle, I can assure you that you can win this battle. Not by killing yourself, which would be losing that battle and giving up. There is no need to give up, you can have a great life, with the normal ups and downs we all have, if you figure out where the negative thoughts are coming from. Sofar I read about the athletic demands, and the girl problem. Tell us more. There are many people on the board who have felt the same, I know I have, and we're here to listen and help.

 

Ilse

[Bethany]

The only true peace is peace of mind.

 

Break your problems up into manageable sized problems, deal with one thing at a time.It will give your mind some rest from 'all of it' mounting up and becoming too much and eventually you will have one less pressure and one less problem. Too much pressure gets to everyone at some time in their lives and we can't just snap our fingers and it goes away, it takes time to ease and eventually it fades.

 

Stop trying to be perfect, nobody is. Let go of all ideas to be perfect. Strive to make things easier for yourself, look for ways of reducing that stress.

Check out sites like this one... , and if it's not 'you', look for another. Keep searching to find ways and others like you and how they cope with them.

 

One thing at a time works. It also gives you a lift when you solve that problem so you can move on to the next. Once you have done this, your reactions calm because of the reduced stress level and you can then deal with your thoughts, even the ones about your ex.

 

There is always a way out, and you are never alone.

[Relationship Coach]

Nike,

Don't Do It! I understand the pressures of being where you are right now in life, wondering how you can continue at such an optimum level, right? Living up to everyone else's expectations and goals, not yours. Wanting to just take a break from it all and hold what is important in your arms? I was there in 1981 and today I'm here. Maybe my entire purpose in life is to help you see the light of taking control of your life once again.

 

It's so easy to lose count of the reps when you're on top of your game but during the hard times we remember every painful rep. You were given a gift use it for the purpose God intended it for. Anyone can pull the trigger, it takes a man to set the gun down and ask for help.

 

RC

[NikE-ElitE]

thank you all i have calmed down a lil i will coninue for now jus hope i can make it its os hard wish it was over

[dsl_broker]

glad to hear. life is a beautiful thing, live it up, expect tough times....when you get to the point you can laugh at them to yourself, you'll be one step ahead of the game. Good luck, and oh by the way, are you really a chargers fan, come on buddy, that could be part of your problem. Take care and and all the best.

[Scout]

Nike, do you feel a lot of people expect too much from you, from a sports point of view? Are you kind of sick of expending all your energy towards sports and want to explore some other things, but feel too many people identify you as a jock, and thereforeeee expect you to constantly be "performing at your best"?

 

If so, I can understand that you must feel very guilty that you're having thoughts that it's all too much, but it could be a signal that there's a heck of a lot more to who you are and it's time those aspects are explored.

 

As for the girl troubles...well, my friend, if you'll allow me a sad little chuckle, I can't promise you'll never have those. Love comes with risks! We usually don't get it right the first time, either. Maybe we can give you some specific advice though, that might be helpful in dealing with the confusion.

 

I'm also interested in hearing how you typically cope with stress.