Dying to say "I Love You", but..

[INeedTheCheese]

I guess, basically, it comes down to a fear of rejection.

 

I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 months. Ive had quite a few relationships before but only been in love once before. Well..I really think I love my boyfriend, but don't want to scare him.

 

There are plenty of signs he really cares about me and hes really into me - he treats me really well, we share problems, we talk for hours, we feel totally at ease in each others company, he travels several hours from Uni at weekends to see me in term time.. (hes 21, Im 17). He's just brilliant really, and has described me as "f*cking awesome" and things like that.. he makes me feel beautiful (no mean feat, I have bad body image) and hes sexually considerate and everything.

 

Should I just come out and say it? I feel like I will explode sometimes if I don't and I want him to know how I feel, but if he doesnt return it ill feel...well..not good.

 

...

[registered]

Well, personally, I'd just say it whenever it feels right. If it feels appropriate then I'd go for it.

 

I think your fear of rejection is perfectly normal.

But does he have to say "I love you" back?

Because he may just not be ready to say it back.

 

It sounds like he really likes you a lot - that's pretty cool, I'd be really happy with that!

It's likely he already is or he will one day be comfortable to say "I love you" back and so I think that is something to have confidence about.

 

To me, saying "I love you" isn't about getting something back in return and so I think it is ok to say it whenever it feels right.

 

Whatever his response is, just remember that your relationship is really great and that is no small thing and needn't be quantified by those three words.

[annie24]

I'm a bit more old-fashioned, I'd rather the man say it first. In the meantime, you can say other stuff like, "I adore you" "I really like spending time with you."

 

If he's not ready to say it yet, you might be really hurt if you say it and he doesn't. That's why I would say to wait.

 

However, your relationship seems to be going well, I bet if things keep progressing, he'll say I love you within a few months.

 

good luck!

[DN]

Somebody has to say it first - it may as well be you as him. I guess everyone is scared a little of rejection so strike a blow for equal rights and go for it.

[Relationship Coach]

INTC,

What do his actions say? Words such as "I love you" can be carelessly thrown about. It's the actions of an individual which spells the word love. There are not rules and guidelines for falling in love or a measure of how much time will pass before it has been acknowledged. Make sure you are not infatuated with him and that you are truly in love with him. If you're afraid of running him off, then somewhere in the back of your mind you are doubting that he loves you. If you are 100% sure that you love him, tell him and accept what follows but at least you are being honest with him and yourself.