hit it and quit it

[John14087]

hey i was just a wonderin, what are ur guys opinions on one night stands? i know many people do it my friends included, but if i found myself in a situation like that. i couldn't bring myself to do it. I dont know if my opinion would be the same if i wasnt a virgin, but i would think that if i did do it i wouldnt be able to take relationships seriously. And most of the guys i know who do it think of it as a game like who can score the most, u know. theres this one buddy of mine who is like the most promiscuous i know who took a girls virginity away and i couldnt help thinking to myself, hows that girl gonna feel when he doesnt call her back tomorrow or ever for that matter. Throw ur opinions at me!!!!!!!

[sidehop]

You're probably the caring type...which I can understand. I wouldn't 'go out' just to get sex but it's one of those 'if it happens, it happens'. If the other girl is just looking for fun sure...but I wouldn't purposely hurt a girl who might be looking for something serious. I couldn't do that.

[michelemybell]

I'm a woman responding to your post...but I think that guys (and girls) who just do it screw over themselves in the long run. When you just do it, the meaning and value of sex gets lost. It just becomes sex, nothing else. It's a huge difference when you have sex with someone who you care for and love, then with someone who you dont have deeper feelings for.

[usied]

i started out bad...and one of ''those '' guys took my virginity ... and ive had it both ways.having sex with some guy ..and having sex with a guy you care about alot...its def alot more special and real if you are all about the person rather then it just being some fun game... alot of ppl think different and tell me im going to change my mind like i want to have that kind of ''fun'' with numerous people but i see it as something serious that can be made fun with someone your comfortable with ... i'd definatly make sure my first time was alot more special if i got the chance it seems you will do just that ...and its very honorable...and if you find someone that feels the same way and respects you then all the better

[gstylez07]

I dont think I could....

 

I'm not a virgin, I had sex with one girl, whom I am no longer with,

and even though I think about trying one night stands, I dont think it would be very enjoyable....I found that the more time I spent getting to know my now ex/gf, the more I enjoyed sex with her...so I think sex is best when you do it with someone special, not just some stranger you met that night.

[DiscipleOfChange]

I wouldn't think of having a one night stand. I feel that sex should be something you save until a certain point in a relationship. I'm a virgin and well, I want my first time to be with someone I've been with for a while and gotten to know really well. I don't disrespect those who approve of one night stands but, I just wouldn't do it

[SkyFire]

hey i was just a wonderin, what are ur guys opinions on one night stands? i know many people do it my friends included, but if i found myself in a situation like that. i couldn't bring myself to do it. I dont know if my opinion would be the same if i wasnt a virgin, but i would think that if i did do it i wouldnt be able to take relationships seriously. And most of the guys i know who do it think of it as a game like who can score the most, u know. theres this one buddy of mine who is like the most promiscuous i know who took a girls virginity away and i couldnt help thinking to myself, hows that girl gonna feel when he doesnt call her back tomorrow or ever for that matter. Throw ur opinions at me!!!!!!!

 

One night stands are acceptable, with the right girl. With a girl who's a virgin and will most likely cling, sex isn't worth the drama that will come later.

 

I will only have a one night stand if a girl and I agree that that's what both of us want.

[ShySoul]

but I think that guys (and girls) who just do it screw over themselves in the long run. When you just do it, the meaning and value of sex gets lost. It just becomes sex, nothing else. It's a huge difference when you have sex with someone who you care for and love, then with someone who you dont have deeper feelings for.

 

My thoughts exactly. Love is the only thing that makes sex worth having.

[Aueft]

I'm a virgin, but I don't think I could bring myself to do a one night stand. I'd rather wait, not until marriage, but at least wait until I was involved with someone.

[benevolent]

I replied to a different thread with the following response: "For me, the one night stand is over."

 

Why? Simple - disease. Promiscuity is so prevalent and STD's are just so rampant that I don't think it is worth it to take such a risk. In the last year, I made it a requirement that any girl that I hook up with, get tested for all STD's. I have 3 good female friends that have told me that they got infected with herpes, HPV and chlamydia. It is just too risky and it should be no surprise that it is reaching epidemic proportions. And guess what - wrapping it up is not a guarantee since my 3 friends all got infected with guys that used a condom.

 

So unless you like sores and lesions growing on yo peepee or plumbag, I suggest maybe taking the higher road and becoming someone who has value rather than a statistic.

 

Just me 2 bits.

[justpaisley]

Benevolent is so incredibly right. One night stands are just NOT worth it in the long run. Sure, you scratch an itch... but it's entirely too possible to get an entirely different itch.

[astralholic]

Well, this is the first post I've replied to as I'm a newbie on here, but I think I can tell it from a different perspective. I'm 26 and used to be like your friends. In the 10 years since I've started to have sex, I've probably slept with around 60 women, including random hookups(as in no intercourse) the number is closer to 100.

 

Honestly, I've only made love with about 5 of those women and those are only the ones that mattered to me. I can't change what I've done and feel bad because I know I've broken more than a few hearts along the way. I've never taken advantage of any women, but I've been a dirt bag afterwards by not calling. I probably missed out on dating a few of those women. I bet some of them were really cool, creative types that would've meshed with my personality. I've never cheated in a relationship and never knowingly slept with a woman who was cheating.

 

You also never know what you're getting in one night stands. Does the girl have prior abuse issues, going through a break-up, unhappy in a relationship, etc. Sometimes, it's just better to talk and be each other's friend, than someone's sex buddy. I know I needed that on more than one occasion.

 

Now and this may sound crazy, but I only want to sleep with women I care about. Maybe I needed to get it out off my system. I've never boasted to anyone, like look at me I'm the man. I've changed bro, sex to me is as important as my soul. Not every woman gets to have a piece.

 

I think once you've been in love, you can't go back. Making love elevates you to the heavens. I truly believe and this may sound funny or weird, but you can feel God in an orgasm and why would you want to share that with anyone you don't truly care about. Sex is the most intimate, outward, physical expression of our affection for each other. That doesn't mean that sex has to be filled with rose petals. Everyone here likes to get down and dirty with the one they love.

 

I think you're on the right track. It's gonna be worth it to hold out for a girl you really dig. Even if she breaks your heart at least you can look at yourself and say I didn't let myself be just a body in the act. I fully gave everything, including my soul.

 

In the end though I say if two people mutually agree to have a one night stand I say go for it. It's your life and not anybody else's. I just can't do it and face myself in the morning anymore. By the way and maybe you can start to see it at your age, but I think that part of the growing up process is seeing that everyone's a hypocrite, including ourselves. It's just trying to minimize how much of a hypocrite we are throughout our lives. Stick to your guns. I'm doing my best to stick to mine. I know it's worth it in the end.

 

Take it easy and sorry if this post was long. Remember it's my first time posting

[Day_Walker]

I think its each person has to make that decision. There are risks involved with one night stands and there are benefits. Some people will be able to do them and others wont. IMO one night stands can be beneficial at certain times.

[ShySoul]

There are risks involved with one night stands and there are benefits

 

What benefits? You get to have sex? Are you that needy that you would go for it even though you know you won't be with this person again? You want to feel the regret and emptiness that comes with it? You want to be able to say to your future partner with whom you plan on spending the rest of your life with that you had sex with people for one night, even though you didn't really love them, and that it was a beneficial thing for you to engage in?

 

Name one instance where its beneficial.

[DarknHandsome]

i dont tihnk id ever want a one night stand, but alcohol is a helluva drug, so i cant say that it would never happen. I love my gf, and whats even better then sex is the satisfaction and the bonding afterward. Sex for the hell of it is only "fun" for however long it lasts and probably wouldnt be worth the worry of getting an std or impregnating someone. Sex with someone you love is a bonding experience that brings you together

[MetallicAguy]

I think one night stands are pointless. Sex should be enjoyed with the one you love, I'm guessing it's better anyhow because of the intimate emotions involved with the one you love. If it's just some girl you picked up from a club or something its pretty much a waste of time. It's temporary pleasure pretty much .

[asdf]

I think one night stands are pointless. Sex should be enjoyed with the one you love, I'm guessing it's better anyhow because of the intimate emotions involved with the one you love. If it's just some girl you picked up from a club or something its pretty much a waste of time. It's temporary pleasure pretty much .

 

and what's wasteful about temporary pleasure? i don't think a person will necessasarily lose anything with a one night stand.

[MetallicAguy]

I'm saying it's probably alright, but with someone you have some feelings for it's probably hella better.

[darkblue]

It's a cheap thrill. I don't see much point in it.

 

I know I wouldn't. But it's a matter of opinion and choice.

[Day_Walker]

Name one instance where its beneficial.

 

The benefit is lustful, passionate sex, regardless of what you believe there are people that lust filled passion is something that they want. A one night stand fills that need thereforeeee it is beneficial. The reason why its a one night stand is because its all about sex, you dont want anything from the other person, you just want your need forfilled.

[ShySoul]

The benefit is lustful, passionate sex, regardless of what you believe there are people that lust filled passion is something that they want. A one night stand fills that need thereforeeee it is beneficial. The reason why its a one night stand is because its all about sex, you dont want anything from the other person, you just want your need forfilled.

 

When your with someone you actually care about and love, the sex can be just as lustful, just as passionate. Plus you get the added pleasures of actually feeling that bond and connection on such a deeper level, along with the knowledge that this person will still be by your side regardless of what else happens. So why settle for something medicore, when you can go for heavenly?

 

Also, what does that say when you do something because its all about sex? You are using each other, which completely distorts the whole beauty of sex to begin with. As much as people may try to deny it, its never "just sex." It's never just a bodily thing. There are feelings, sensations, emotions involved. Sex shouldn't be about getting your needs fulfilled, it about sharing yourself with someone and fulfilling each others needs.

 

Really, how can you be satisfied with yourself knowing that you used another person for your own sexual enjoyment? For that matter, how does it feel knowing that you are being used?I don't see how anyone can enjoy that.

[RyanWhite]

I was desperate to find someone who would give me affection (not just sex) but I fooled myself over and over again, I would get with a girl who wanted a 1 or 2 night stand, but I would force it to be a 1 month stand so on...

 

Right now I am on a 7 night in a row stand, with an internet mate. I should walk away, but I am letting her get attached.

 

I dont want a one night stand I want something where we can become one, and understand each other... Not many women I am interested in, want that, or if they do they dont want sex till marriage, something I wont deal with. Not cause I am bad, but if you cant sleep with someone and get to know them inside and out and mentaly, how could you take a vow to be with them forever. Sex is something to connect with, yes it shouldnt be abused, but... anyway