Should I change my image/lifestyle?

[Mysterious Gurl]

Helloooo everyone hows it going?

 

I feel a bit weird actaully because I noticed that most girls my age aren't like me. I mean peole have often said I'm a man trapped in a gurls body!!!!!!! I guess their joking but it still makes me feel weird about my image.

 

I love football! I'm telling you I'm crazy! when a match is on I get dressed up, turn tv up full power, beer, and fixed to the tv and then start cursing the ref for unfair fowls ect ... I love sports shops. In the UK we have a shop called JJB Sports & Soccer Sports and most girls think it's a guys shop even if it does sell girl clothes! Thay are my favourite shops ever, I always have to go in.

 

I like beer and wines, I know at 16 I'm not really suppose to drink but I pop in to my local for a quiet drink sometimes, and then drink on a special occasions.

 

I love being attached to my walkman. I take it everywhere and feel lost and empy without it. Unfortunatley I went to an REM concert about 3 weeks ago at Old Trafford (Manchester) and left my walkman at the hotel so I have to wait for them to post it to me.

 

I find some chick flicks boring. I Like horror and comedy is that so wrong??

 

I just gather that people think I'm quite boyish and not in a good way like being a tomboy. I was playing football with my friends down the grove and I kicked the ball towards the goal (missed) and it hit the boy in the ribs and he said "Jeez Miya! you don't have to be so manly ... it's just a game ... take it easy will ya ... your gunner send me to casualty!!" I felt shocked. It was an honest accident but now I wish I hit him somewhere alse after that remark.

 

Anyway ... should I change? will it make me more ... I don't know the word ... "girly" I don't want to be girly! I'm not the sort to wear high heals, mini skirts and low cut tops. I couldn't do it! I'm personally happy with my image but I guess some people arent ...

 

What should I do? Jazmine (snobby lass from my school who's veeerrrry snooty) said my bedroom was made for a boy simply because it has football posters of a r s e n a l and bedsheats everywhere. Maybe I should change ...

I'm 16 so what do you think? I'm sorry this is so long, I just really need someone to understand where I'm coming from ...

 

cheers,

 

Miya

[DN]

I think you are a great girl - don't change a thing.

[CarterJonas]

Why change things you like

[Mysterious Gurl]

Thanks 8)

 

Well like I said I feel happy with my image but I just feel that people think I'm manly and boyish and thats not the appearance I want to show. I would change but I couldn't imagin my life with out football ... lol

 

But honestly people make me feel quite manly and outer place so I just wondered what people thought ...

 

 

Miya x

[Fif Angel]

yeah u sound funky

 

The things you`ve described seem totally normal to me. Just because one happens to be female doesn`t mean you have to go about dressed in pink sequins all the time with a little dog in your handbag!

 

I drink beer sometimes too( I developed a taste for it when I went to spain and found it was as cheap as water)-nowt wrong with that!

 

Just be happy with yourself and have fun!

[wierdo]

have you noticed that the "girly" girls spend a lot of their time obsessing about boys, clothes and their weight? who wants to do that??

 

if you are happy with you, then keep doing what you are doing. theres nothing more unattractive than an insecure girl. which is what you'll end up if you change to please other people.

 

i think it's great that you spend time doing what you love to do. that boy you hit was probably embarrassed to get hurt in front of his mates. it probably wansn't meant to be hurtful. be true to yourself above all others..

 

and GO ARSENAL!!!

[arwen]

Hey Miya!

 

Take it from a non-girly girl: be who you are, not what you think others might think you maybe should be

 

Also us non-girly galls are 100% woman!

 

 

 

Ilse.

[bobster]

You sound like a great gal Mysterious!!! "don't ever change" quote form Lightning Seeds!!!!

 

 

Don't know about you but I wish I could change!! I'm 5'4", a bit over weight with blonde mulletish hair and a sad looking face........into music 'n' comedy and having a laugh.

 

Just had one hell of a night tonight.......but I'm sure if I was 6'2" with black hair and drinking like a ponce...... I'd have been ok!!

[Mr. B]

Helloooo everyone hows it going?

Anyway ... should I change?

Fu** No! You don't need to change for anybody... and I'm not sure why you'd want to, you sound like excellent girlfriend material to me.

[fiercelyfeminine]

If you are happy with yourself, that is all that matters.

 

I commend you for being yourself, don't ever stop!

[DN]

How would A R S E N A L get by without you to support them properly?

[DropToZero]

You are who you are, don't change a thing.....even tho everyone else has said this, haha, I was about to put up "CHANGE YOURSELF!!!" just to be a little different from everyone else(maybe even stir up something hehe). You're great, keep the posts coming, keep the advice flowin'

[darkblue]

Feel comfortable in your own skin; don't let anyone change you.

 

Change comes from within, Only if you want to change do you think about it.

 

You are absolutely fine the way you are

 

Be comfortable with it.

 

Live with it.

 

Don't change

[suprema99]

Some very attractive women play sports and sometimes are easier to get along with. Sometimes girls who don't mind doing things like that are a lot cooler and more fun to be around. Don't worry about it.

[shorty20]

Ok, I would deffinatley NOT change. I hate to break it to you, but alot of guys don't like "girly" girls. Alot of guys like more natural girls... girls they won't have to wait for for an hour while they get ready... girls that can kick back, do fun things and have a good time without worrying hwo they look. I, personally, and more girly, but you are who you are. My best friend is the biggest tom boy I know. She's so funny, and just dosen't care what people think... and u know what? Guy's fall all over her. She's 19, and never really been single... we've been best friends since we were like 13, and let me tell you, guys see her as one hell of a catch. She just got married to her highschool sweetheart... and STILL has guys falling all over her even though she's got a ring. Guys love girls that like to get down and dirty... the think that she's such a catch if she will sit there and watch football and drink beer.... DONT CHANGE HUN.... guys will love you for who you are... and if they don't then they're not worth it... wouldn't you rather be happy with yourself then try to pretend to be someone your not really comfortable being?? You sound like an awesome girl... and alot of fun for the guys, so stay the same you, and if someone makes comments, just laugh with them... one time, my best friend actually was wearing some really short jean shorts and a pink t-shirt, and she looked somewhat girl... our friend saw her and was like "dang, I'm surprised your d*ck isn't falling out of your shorts!" and we all just laughed... it's not really anything to get defensive about... it's something that guys, I think, find rather attractive and thats why they comment about it...

[shes2smart]

I've been a "one of the guys" girl for my entire life. I wouldn't want it any other way.

 

It's actually one of the things my husband likes best about me.

[Mysterious Gurl]

Wow! Thanks ... 8)

 

I was expecting people to say I should cut down a little on my hobbies and interests. Well I do like my image but I just thought if I had the boyish loo about me people would think I was a boy or something ...

 

So if anyone says anything to me about my image what should I say to them? I mean I don't actually know any girl my age who likes football and ... sports shops and ... whatever else ...

 

so it made me think if there was something wrong with me,

 

Miya

[shes2smart]

So if anyone says anything to me about my image what should I say to them?

 

Thanks for your concern, but I like me the way I am.

[volution]

What has always perplexed me is that it's OK for women to be like men, but the other way round, it's almost like a crime, for a man to be like a woman. There is a Madonna song "What it Feels Like for a Girl"...

The Lyrics start off:

"Girls can wear jeans

And cut their hair short

Wear shirts and boots

'Cause it's OK to be a boy

But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading

'Cause you think that being a girl is degrading"

 

Men are encouraged (and often forced) to be 'macho', 'competitive', 'hard', 'strong', 'ruthless', 'cold', 'distant', 'unattached' etc. and yet those that want to be 'soft' and 'gentle' and 'kind' are often ridiculed by society. And then women complain that their men aren't 'soft' and 'gentle' enough.

People don't realise strength can be found in softness.

 

I'm the opposite of you, I affine more with the feminine than the masculine. Sometimes I feel like I should have been born a girl. But I've realised I'm who I am, I have a more feminine soul than most men.

And I know that most women do really appreciate softness and gentleness from a man.

[Mysterious Gurl]

Thanks for your concern, but I like me the way I am.

 

Thanks for that! I'll say that next time! 8)

 

I do like being a gurl, and I do gurly things like read magazines, make sure my appearance is good (not face full of make up) understanding and care a lot for the world. I love animals, flowers and all that but I really just prefere being a tomboy. I tried being a gurly gurl (Jazmine sort of tried to train me) but I sucked at it! My ankles hurt in heels, I wanted to punch the builders that whistled at me when I wore a skirt and I felt too much like a barbie doll when she put war paint on my face.

 

The only time I wear a dress or a skirt is on special occasions. Then I look smart. Otherwise it's, jeans, trackies and shorts & three quater lengths for me!

 

I think society should accept men who have a soft side. I mean what is wrong with having a soft side? Is it an unwritten law that gurls have to 'gurly & men have to be 'Manly'?

 

It's not like I insult anyone elses lifestyle! I just don't get why it's so wrong for me too like the interests I do ...

 

Miya

[boxinggirl89]

Hiya Miya,

i cant really say anything as im a gurly pinky sweet sort of gurl, who doesnt really understand footie and wotever boys understsand. But as im ur mate, i wud say, dont even think of changing or i'll tell James Leech you fancy him and i dont think Adam wud think changing wud b appropiate too. ok c u luv ya byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 

Lots of luv Frankee x x x 8)

 

Frankee and Miya all the way!!!

 

Cristiano renaldo all the way!!!

[Mysterious Gurl]

lol

 

thanks for the advice Frankie I wont change. It's just sometimes people make me feel like a boy. I don't fnd it a problem that I do boyish things, but it's just I thought it looked bad.

 

All my girl mates have girly rooms with boyband posters, and flowery bed sheets and pink curtains, I have football posters, bedsheets, sporty stuff in my room, no boyband poster or anything like that so I thought it made me different frm everyone else in a bad way ...

 

I don't know if you get what I'm saying ...

 

Miya

[Blue Skittles]

Yeah - definitely don't change - you are great the way you are!! Besides, guys like girls with personality - so whats the point on changing and then having no personality cuz you aren't who you are anymore. Be who you are and be proud of it!!