Sons security

[LL1421]

Married 3 yrs was promised the world, turns out his quite nasty. He regularly tells me to get out his house, which we bought together , but the main issue thats playing on my mind now is he has told me ,never to my son,that he wants him out. 

This is making me realise that my son ,18 autistic, has no security, if i was to die tomorrow woukd he just get thrown out ? 

I have been sifting away some money for me and my son to move out but this takes time, how can i make sure he has some security if i died ?  All money is in a joint account , house is in both mine and husbands name 

[Batya33]

Does your son qualify for government assistance based on disability ?

[LL1421]

1 minute ago, Batya33 said:

Does your son qualify for government assistance based on disability ?

Yes he gets DLA

[boltnrun]

Open a separate account and start socking away money into a trust. These funds will be reserved for him for when you are no longer present. Do not put your husband's name on the account but rather assign someone you trust implicitly (sibling? cousin? trusted friend?) to manage the trust for you and for your son. Also assign a conservator to look out for your son's interests when you are gone. 

Unfortunately you will need to keep this from your husband. 

Do you intend to stay in this marriage?

[LL1421]

1 minute ago, boltnrun said:

Open a separate account and start socking away money into a trust. These funds will be reserved for him for when you are no longer present. Do not put your husband's name on the account but rather assign someone you trust implicitly (sibling? cousin? trusted friend?) to manage the trust for you and for your son. Also assign a conservator to look out for your son's interests when you are gone. 

Unfortunately you will need to keep this from your husband. 

Do you intend to stay in this marriage?

I dont think so, its becoming too toxic 

[Seraphim]

You and your son need to leave. Please don’t subject a vulnerable person to this kind of abuse. 

[LL1421]

10 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

You and your son need to leave. Please don’t subject a vulnerable person to this kind of abuse. 

Im working on it , im sifting monwy away, it just takes time, if i had some where to go i would 

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, LL1421 said:

Married 3 yrs was promised the world, turns out his quite nasty. He regularly tells me to get out his house, which we bought together , 

Sorry this is happening.  Obviously if you co-own the house and are legally married, he can't throw you out. 

Please contact an attorney privately and confidentiality for information support and advice. Do not tell him and do not threaten divorce. Do not leave the marital home.

Please also contact agencies about domestic violence and abuse of the disabled.  You could also benefit from information and support from agencies that protect the disabled and can give you support and advice on how to set up care for your son. Please look into organizations like this for help in your jurisdiction.

Your husband can not legally threaten or bully a disabled adult. If necessary consider getting a restraining order against your husband to buy time until you divorce. 

https://www.specialneedsalliance.org/blog/recognizing-and-preventing-abuse-neglect-and-exploitation-of-individuals-with-disabilities-and-older-adults/

[Seraphim]

12 minutes ago, LL1421 said:

Im working on it , im sifting monwy away, it just takes time, if i had some where to go i would 

My son is Autistic as well. It breaks my heart for your son. In the meantime keep your husband away from him. 

[poorlittlefish]

As your husband has such a massive problem with both you AND your son, why doesn't HE get out?  You jointly own the house, so you are under no obligation to go anywhere.  I suspect he knows that any court would probably be more sympathetic to your situation, not his.