maew Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Ahhhhhh, that explains it. Big difference. Yeah, what I'd do is hang back, post all sorts of stuff on Snap, see if she keeps watching. If she slides into your DMs and talks about how she can't get you out of her mind then see what she's up to. Man you are full of sass today blue! [emoji38] In all seriousness OP I am not sure how old you are, I found it common in the guys I dated in their 40s to be very reticent in following up, almost like they were expecting me to do all the initiating and pursuing which for me is a huge turn off. If you want to date her, take the lead and ask her out. Most women find an assertive man pretty attractive. Link to comment
bluecastle Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Man you are full of sass today blue! That was from four days ago, for the record. Every so often I think a dash of sass can help clear the lenses, but I don't think that was this case here. I am genuinely curious to understand the mindset here, since it sounds like what Sixers wants is for women to be totally cool with exactly what he is totally uncool with. Link to comment
katrina1980 Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 To add to my last post, I think we (both men and women) would be wise and have much more successful, positive dating experiences if we let go of expectations, and become more open and flexible. I mean the expectations we place on each other, and the presumptions we make, and after only one date no less, are not serving anyone any good purpose imo. To the contrary they're potentially destroying what might turn out to be a great match! But they will never know, with all these expectations, presumptions and "rules" placed on each other. This goes for both gendersl A real shame imo. Link to comment
Sixersfan234 Posted July 22, 2019 Author Share Posted July 22, 2019 Reaching out to someone and responding to a text message is a different thing... for example... I ended up txting the girl Wednesday around 2:00 PM.. She responded back 9AM the next morning.. I replied back to her message at 3:00 that day (which was Thursday)...she replied back to me Sunday at 8:00 AM........ now 'm not mad about that, and that's the part you guys are getting confused about.. all I'm thinking to myself is that his girl prob. has low interest. Now after a first date if a girl reaches out to me before I reach out to her whether its a week later or a month later, then she has high interest ( in my opinion)........ Now with this girl I have never communicated anger wit her super delayed responses... its like a game of tennis...she hit the ball over the net and ill hit it back Link to comment
Sixersfan234 Posted July 22, 2019 Author Share Posted July 22, 2019 I agree, Blue. OP, you respond in a week and it's no big deal. She responds the next day and it's "low interest". Which is it??? respond in a week?... I never said that..when did I say I responded to her in a week Link to comment
maew Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Your not answering the question.... You have TWO choices.... if your into a guy after the first date.. would you rather him not reach out to you AT ALL... or have him reach out to you 5 days later... my effort is lazy because i reached out to her a week later? lol thats to funny 5 days would be totally ok with me if it was a stranger from the Internet and our first meet up. If the guy ditched me after me taking a day to respond? Or expected me to do all of the initiating? I would next him... it would mean we have different relationship goals. I like my relationships to be reciprocal so I look for that up front. That all being said... if the vibe was off for you, no need to move forward with any of it. Link to comment
bluecastle Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 all I'm thinking to myself is that his girl prob. has low interest. I'm thinking you're "prob" right. I'm also thinking she prob thinks your interest in her is pretty low, and that she'd prob be right. Per some earlier posts of mine, I think your primary interest in all this—meaning women and dating—is prob more about just seeing if they're interested in you than being interested in them. Who they are, what they're all about—that seems secondary to your first priority in meeting women, which is that they show you "high interest." When you stop caring about how into you they are, and start focusing on whether you're into them, it stops feeling like a game of tennis and more like something else. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 It sounds like you are taking this Pickup Artist stuff way too seriously and it's backfiring big time. Hair twirling? Wait to return calls? The cocky and funny approach? Playing hard to get/hardball etc may stroke your ego but it won't get you dates or sex. All these tactics that are regurgitated from the seduction community are gimmicks for losers. Just message women, set up a meet, decide if you want a second date then take it from there. If you have to read the "signs" to determine low-high interest and play games then you're behind the curve on this. The good news is as soon as you ditch the PUA crap, you'll do fine. she was into me more then I thought, I mean she was playing with her hair Link to comment
Sixersfan234 Posted July 22, 2019 Author Share Posted July 22, 2019 It sounds like you are taking this Pickup Artist stuff way too seriously and it's backfiring big time. Hair twirling? Wait to return calls? The cocky and funny approach? Playing hard to get/hardball etc may stroke your ego but it won't get you dates or sex. All these tactics that are regurgitated from the seduction community are gimmicks for losers. Just message women, set up a meet, decide if you want a second date then take it from there. If you have to read the "signs" to determine low-high interest and play games then you're behind the curve on this. The good news is as soon as you ditch the PUA crap, you'll do fine. When did I say I wait to return her calls? I don't follow PUA.. that stuff is trash... male and female body language has nothing to do with PUA.. its natural... you should read about it... read signs?... yea.. a person should always gauge a man or woman's attraction towards them... if not then that person is setting themselves up for failure... I'm not playing any "game"... Link to comment
Sixersfan234 Posted July 22, 2019 Author Share Posted July 22, 2019 after a date with a woman I may call her a couples day later... or a week later...I reach out when I want to.. when I feel its right... I have other things going on in my life to play games... my sex life is perfectly fine.. trust me.. Link to comment
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