Shortest relationship I've ever been in lol

[limichelle]

So we lasted a month of dating. I couldn't take it any longer! He was nice at first and then I noticed the temper, plus the 'know it all' attitude and the fact he belittled and spoke to me as if I was a child, I called him out on it and it made things worse!

 

I realized I was headed for a hellish ordeal if I continued so I broke it off. I thought he took it well. I was happy and relieved. Then came the emails six of them to be exact each one psychotic telling me he knows deep down I want to be with only him and I was afraid of facing my feelings for him. Then he said that I love him and he knows this. First off we never said I love you. We only were together a month!

 

Then came the voice mail after I had blocked him on my phone. He used someone else's phone at his work! The voice mails were creepy as hell! They were threatening to come over to my house to talk things through so I could see the error in my ways. That I needed to be taught for my own good to not be afraid to commit to him. That I love him and he wants to save me from making a big mistake. I threatened him with the police and that's when I got him to finally stop!

 

It was the shortest relationship but the hardest to get out of!

[annie24]

What a creep!! Glad you told him you'd call the police on him. Still, write down all of the times he's contacted you after you asked him to stop, in case he does try to contact you again, so you have a written record for the police.

[MissCanuck]

What a creep!! Glad you told him you'd call the police on him. Still, write down all of the times he's contacted you after you asked him to stop, in case he does try to contact you again, so you have a written record for the police.

 

Yes, OP, please follow this advice.

 

This guy sounds unhinged.

[Metaltwin70]

Limichelle, is it this bloke you're referring to?

 

https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=552718

 

I did say at the time to not get too hasty thinking you've found 'the one'...

[limichelle]

What a creep!! Glad you told him you'd call the police on him. Still, write down all of the times he's contacted you after you asked him to stop, in case he does try to contact you again, so you have a written record for the police.

 

Thank you! That is a great idea considering how disturbed he is. Luckily the police threat worked as I've not heard from him. I'm crossing my fingers it remains that way.

[limichelle]

Yes, OP, please follow this advice.

 

This guy sounds unhinged.

 

I do pray he doesn't show up to the house. He's left me alone with the emails and voice mails but with him you never know so I'm definitely documenting everything.

The weird thing is, I've been stalked before and he knows this!

[limichelle]

Limichelle, is it this bloke you're referring to?

 

https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=552718

 

I did say at the time to not get too hasty thinking you've found 'the one'...

 

Yes, that is him. You were very right to not rush into things. The odd thing is, we never said I love you of course because it was too early too even think about that word let alone feel those feelings, and after I broke up with him he kept using that word quite a bit.

[Metaltwin70]

Good riddance! IMHO and experience, it takes about a year of dating and a year of living together for you to start getting to know the real person behind the 'perfect stranger' of the first few honeymoon months of dating. Anyone can put up a front for a few months. For two years, not so much. You only really get to know someone through living 'real life' with them. Every day routines, work, stress, bills, health, family issues, holidays taken together etc etc etc. I'd keep that in mind for the future and I wish you all the best.

[MissCanuck]

Yes, that is him. You were very right to not rush into things. The odd thing is, we never said I love you of course because it was too early too even think about that word let alone feel those feelings, and after I broke up with him he kept using that word quite a bit.

 

Unfortunately, that type of behaviour is not at all odd for people who try to manipulate and intimidate exes who they feel scorned them. It's meant to try to get you to do what he wants.

 

Please do be careful. You're not dealing an emotionally stable person.

[Starlight925]

Unfortunately, these hot & heavy relationships don't usually last. I've had to learn my lesson, including my last relationship, from the ones that come on so strong at first.

 

They put on an act of total acceptance and admiration of who you are, so you can feel vulnerable, but when things don't work out, they use those things against you. The last words my ex texted to me were that I'd be a bitter, lonely woman. This was from someone who put me on such a pedestal and extolled my great virtues.

 

I am certainly not here to judge you. I have a thread that is miles long about the situation I was in. Trust me, it's better for you that it ended sooner, as this only gets worse.

 

This makes you feel really special, and then you get the rug yanked out from under you.

 

Yes, beware of his manipulations, as this is who he really is. The nice, sweet, wonderful guy you met at first was only his mask.

 

Best to simply back away. Don't engage. Silently wish him the best, and hope that he finds a new target. And yes, keep records.

[limichelle]

He contacted me again! I'm ignoring all messages and keeping record in case he takes it to another level and comes here. His email consisted of the same context as the other ones; how I'm scared of my emotions. I won't give him any glimpse of hope so I won't respond.

 

It's annoying checking my email and finding his messages there I tried blocking him on yahoo. Or I thought I had and evidently it's not working. There is not a usual block button I can click on.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to hear this. Wow what a weirdo! Good you cut him off.

[Batya33]

Good riddance! IMHO and experience, it takes about a year of dating and a year of living together for you to start getting to know the real person behind the 'perfect stranger' of the first few honeymoon months of dating. Anyone can put up a front for a few months. For two years, not so much. You only really get to know someone through living 'real life' with them. Every day routines, work, stress, bills, health, family issues, holidays taken together etc etc etc. I'd keep that in mind for the future and I wish you all the best.

 

I disagree. I don't think living together before marriage needs to be part of it -if my husband and i had it would have hurt not helped because I likely would have expected it to be the same after marriage. 3 months after marriage we were thrilled to become parents and for the next 3 months lived together with our baby and all his stuff in a less than 600 square foot apartment. First time marriage, first time parents. I had never lived with anyone other than for a week or so at one time years ago. Living together as husband, wife, new parents - nothing in common with the many nights/weeks we spent together at each other's places. It really was fine my point is that living together before marriage wouldn't have given relevant information and might have raised unrealistic expectations. I am a fan of spending days/weeks in a row together while maintaining your own places and certainly living together if you feel like it -just not as some sort of test for marriage/the long term.

 

 

OP -I had suggested head in the clouds and feet on the ground and that you continue to have fun. I am really really sorry things took this turn. I can only imagine how stressful it is for you and frustrating. I've been through similar, I get it. I am really glad he backed off after you threatened to call the police, I hope this is the end of it and I am glad you are ok.