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The guy I have liked for ages, had to cancel a coffee date (we were going out as friends, he doesn't 100% know how i feel about him) - legitimate excuse for canceling, he said we should do it another day that week.

 

Anyway we decided on friday (we volunteer together on fri nights).. he said he'd email me, but never did - when I got to the volunteer place, he acted like nothing had happened, was friendly and made an effort to talk to me... but I ignored him, avoided him and was deliberately short with him. When he left, he said "I'll email you." I must have looked unimpressed, because he stood there staring at me for a second, as if to say "what?" then kinda smiled and left... it was so weird...

 

Any thoughts?

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So, basically, you two decided to get coffee on friday night, and then it rolls around and he makes no mention of it. But, you were acting kind of cold, so he might have assumed you no longer wanted to go hang out.

 

erm... I guess wait and see if he e-mails you. If he does, apologize for being short with him last time. good luck!

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Since he didnt email you as he said then you have an insight into his character. If he emails you then he does, I wouldnt count on it. If he does then DO NOT forget that he doesnt keep his word. Keep what he did in mind and his behavior wont surprise you. At this point you need to decide how you want to pursue the situation since he has acted this way.

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Either he's not really interested and is only being polite, likes you but is completely clueless on how to act, or is playing games with you to see your reaction. It doesn't look to good. Plus the fact that you have been interested in him for so long and nothings come about. I think you need to decide if he is really worth all the time, effort, and thought your putting into him. Do you want to keep pursuing him and getting these reactions or would you rather find someone who is willing to pay you the attention you deserve and actually remember you are suppose to go out?

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DN - ever the optimist....

 

 

 

I just remember a story from the second world war where a woman got annoyed because her boyfriend didn't reply to her last letter, so she stopped writing to him. Years later the post office delivered a letter from him that had got lost, not only was it the reply to her letter - it was a marriage proposal. She assumed he was not interested any more - he assumed she was too afraid to write and reject him.

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True, but the point is mis-communication. Assume for a moment that he sent it to the wrong address. He expects a reply but doesn't get one. When he comes into the volunteer centre, she treats him like pond scum.

"Better back off" he thinks, "I'll just be friendly and see what happens". And there you go - mis-communication.

 

I'm not saying this is likely - just possible.

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Hey guys,

 

I know you're right... I wish I could just get over it, like I should have months back... No email and I doubt there will be. Why can't I just let go?

 

And I am sure he didn;t send an email to the wrong addy, he's emailed me plenty of times before... But thanks for the optimism!

 

QM

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