Stacks44 Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 I'm sorry you're feeling down. I love talking to strangers when I'm a tourist. Any chance of finding a bar and striking up a conversation? How do you keep running into her btw? I can't find it in the thread, but I remember reading it a while ago Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 Aww , I'm sorry. Don't let this spoil your adventure! Tell her you'll talk when you get back home. Try to put it out of your mind for now. I know it doesn't help being with a couple that are so happy right now, it does make reality of your situation set in. You have to wonder if the engagement stirred up some emotions within her also that she's saying this to you. She's missing you, that's obvious. But now she's setting you back after you came so far. I hope you can enjoy the rest of your vacation. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted March 31, 2018 Author Share Posted March 31, 2018 We are just going to the same places i guess. I would do that but I have not found a bar or anyone that talks English. I know she is missing me. She said it to me but I dont want to think about it. I just want to try and enjot myself Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 hello brother, Sorry to hear you have had a couple of down days.. this will still happen. I know it's difficult, but you need to cut all ties to the ex.. meaningless breadcrumbs like this will get you nowhere.. remember how she made you feel the last time you met up with her. You shouldn't be conversing with someone who has so little respect for you. Are there no Irish bars there? (I am convinced there is even an Irish bar on Mars!) lol I hope it picks up for you. Make the most of where you are.. it's a wonderful experience. S x Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted March 31, 2018 Author Share Posted March 31, 2018 I think the next place we are still staying in the same hotel so will still run into her. I did find a pub but £10 a pint is a bit steep for me im affraid. Im trying to enjoy my holiday but when i get back i know she is gone for good whitch is a bit refreshing No more trip lingering over ne just moving on with my life Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 hello brother, Sorry to hear you have had a couple of down days.. this will still happen. I know it's difficult, but you need to cut all ties to the ex.. meaningless breadcrumbs like this will get you nowhere.. remember how she made you feel the last time you met up with her. You shouldn't be conversing with someone who has so little respect for you. Are there no Irish bars there? (I am convinced there is even an Irish bar on Mars!) lol I hope it picks up for you. Make the most of where you are.. it's a wonderful experience. S x Oh wow. That just hit me like a ton of bricks! The "you shouldn't be conversing with someone who has so little respect for you" you are so right. That applies to me too, although he's been silent for what is now the sixth day. Carry on, Piaresssss, you're right. When the trip ends she's gone again. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 1, 2018 Author Share Posted April 1, 2018 I cant seem to shake this funk. I just wanna come home and forget about ny ex for the foreseeable future. Im gonna start a new diet when i get back. I have hit a stand still so gotta shake things up. Gotta do stuff to get back to where I was. Happy. Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted April 1, 2018 Share Posted April 1, 2018 Don't allow this to set you back. Have fun. Proof again of why NC is best . Sigh......... I feel bad for you. You'll shake it, you're stronger than this. You came so very far, you will again. It's probably being away from home too that makes it feel worse. Link to comment
Carus Posted April 1, 2018 Share Posted April 1, 2018 The "you shouldn't be conversing with someone who has so little respect for you" you are so right. That applies to me too.... Me three :-/ ....and I'm not sure I will after this last little hook which then when I asked how she was and if she wanted to meet up this week she had the decency to just ignore that....I then found out from a mutual that she's gone and got a 500K mortgage with a GF of hers! So she's moved on, and bought herself a house but still...500K plus interest = ! Why she still even contacts me is beyond me..! Sorry it's marred your trip a bit P* but I'm glad you went...I think you've handled the breadcrumbs well, especially considering she's got a new toy no..? Will you get a chance to ride on one of those bullet trains that do over 200mph...?? Judging by your progress over the last few months I have no doubt you'll bounce back pretty quickly..... Your ups and downs have been on a radically lesser scale than mine that's for sure! Regards Carus* Link to comment
Stacks44 Posted April 2, 2018 Share Posted April 2, 2018 Carus, I've heard you and Sputnik both refer to "breadcrumbs" and originally I thought "Hey, they miss you, you can have them back! Go for it!".........but now I've started to see that they're often not looking for reconciliation or to apologize. They're usually looking for a confidence boost or some other selfish "pick me up" at your expense. Its's really cruel when you think about it. If my ex ever does reach out again (And a think there's a strong chance she won't, because she didn't even have the guts to break up with someone she lived with for three years face to face) I've learned to be cautious, skeptical, and suspicious of her true intentions. None of us are backup plans or puppets. Just wanted to say thanks for that. Link to comment
Carus Posted April 2, 2018 Share Posted April 2, 2018 I'm glad you're realising that Stacks* The very hardest thing about it is when you still love and care about that person and of course have that Hope.....! It seems cruel but mostly they have moved on and are unaware of the anguish we go through, and therefore think "Oh it should be fine to flick 'em a text etc...." And all I've ever seen it do is send the poor person spiraling backwards..... Hope you're doin' ok...You too Piaressss* and my dear SweetGirl* Carus* Link to comment
Stacks44 Posted April 2, 2018 Share Posted April 2, 2018 If I could give up hope I'd probably have healed 100% Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 3, 2018 Author Share Posted April 3, 2018 Im doing okay today Carus Hope your holding strong too Im going to the dear park tomorrow. You get crackers to feed them and they bow at you. Im so excited to go. Hope everyone else is doing good. Link to comment
Stacks44 Posted April 3, 2018 Share Posted April 3, 2018 We're doing good when you are! That does sound exciting. I can't even get my cat to not look at me with pure hatred and contempt when I give her her favorite flavor. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 3, 2018 Author Share Posted April 3, 2018 Haha my old cat was like the opposite he would follow me all day. Speaking of cats Im going to the cat cafe they have round the corner from my inn. They just sit there while you have lunch. Thinkits gonna be interrsting. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 3, 2018 Author Share Posted April 3, 2018 Hey guys just a quick question for you all. Ran into the ex again. Its a small village. We got to talking and I casually mentioned I had a fwd. This made her cry and act like a . I was wondering do you think she has a leg to stand on. It seems very I have someone but you cant have anything. I am by no means in a relationship and dont intend to be but my ex said it bothers her that im sleeping with this woman. Side note.... it is the girl my ex would make out with all the time. It is just a but hypocritical I think or do you think I was in the wrong for just casually mentioning it. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted April 3, 2018 Share Posted April 3, 2018 Well...you "casually mentioned it" because you wanted a reaction. Now you'll be wondering "What did it MEAN?? Why did she cry??" I won't tell you that it was wrong but I do have to wonder why you continue to engage with her. You were doing well, why start it all over again? Side note, I don't know that it's a coincidence that your "FWB" is the same woman that was your ex's makeout partner. Seems like an awful lot of intertwining that is just keeping you connected to your ex. Isn't it possible to "run into" your ex without having a relationship autopsy? Why can't you just nod hello and go on with your day? Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 3, 2018 Author Share Posted April 3, 2018 Your right. I probably did want a reaction. It will be possible. But i feel anger when ever i see her. Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted April 3, 2018 Share Posted April 3, 2018 Your ex is bisexual? She was with you and this girl who is now your fwb? She had no right to be upset. She broke up with you. She chose not to get back together. You are free to do as you please, with whomever. That includes her former make out chick, because technically she was not being failful to you by having a girl on the side while with you. Or was this girl at a different time than you? Why did her and the girl stop making out? This is the girl you work with,right? When you get back home just avoid her. You're allowing your vacation to be interrupted by talking with her, which will leave you with bad memories of this trip, instead of a great experience. Every time you remember it and talk about it with someone, your ex will pop up in your mind. Stop talking to her . Hello, see ya, have a nice day. End of story. Unless now you're thinking this might cause her to reconsider and she might try to come back to you. Which she might out of jealousy. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 3, 2018 Author Share Posted April 3, 2018 Yep she is bisexual. It is the girl I work with. My ex used to make out with her when we where together but It didnt bother me. Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted April 4, 2018 Share Posted April 4, 2018 Yep she is bisexual. It is the girl I work with. My ex used to make out with her when we where together but It didnt bother me. Why not? Because it was with another girl? Or because you had you agreed? I hope you're enjoying the trip ! Be happy kiddo! Make great memories :) Link to comment
Stacks44 Posted April 4, 2018 Share Posted April 4, 2018 Men are funny like that sometimes. We don't see another woman as a threat because our biology and evolution is geared more towards passing on our genes, so only other males are competition. Piaressss the cat cafe sounds amazing. When I was in the Dominican Republic the resort had a lot of cats living there. Huge plus for me. Link to comment
sputnik123 Posted April 4, 2018 Share Posted April 4, 2018 hello brother, Another cat lover here.. enjoy! ;) Yes, there is no point travelling half-way around the world and spending time talking to an ex who treated you terribly! Remember your true value and you will come out of the other side, with the sun shining. Keep moving it forward.. you have made incredible progress, even if some days you cannot see it. :) Ensure to enjoy the rest of your time there.. clean slate upon your return! S x Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 4, 2018 Author Share Posted April 4, 2018 Hey brother, I cannot wait for that clean slate again. To know that I will not have to see her is going to make the world of difference. It sucks that it has ruined my holiday but that is life I guess. Im gonna just keep moving forward with my life. Im actually starting a new diet when i get home. I have lost so much weight now that I can fit into clothes I wore when I was 16. Link to comment
Piaresssss Posted April 4, 2018 Author Share Posted April 4, 2018 Stacks is right sweets. It was because it was a woman I didnt care. If it was a man I would of flipped my lid. I dont have any pets anymore. I think getting one would really help me feel better. Link to comment
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