Brittan123 Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 My boyfriend and I got into an argument 2 days ago, and it was over sex. The last couple of times we have had sex, things haven’t been the same. I really had a hard time dealing with it, and I told him I was going to take a shower. While I was in the shower, he got all of his stuff and left my apartment without telling me anything. I called him after my shower, and I told him I wanted to talk in person. he told me he wasn’t coming back that he might as well be done with the relationship. So I just said okay I’m not talking about it over the phone so I guess it is what it is. Well, he starts texting me and calling me a coward and I told him he was the one who left. I also said some really mean things out of frustration and worry, and he told me he was done with me. I tried calling him back that night to apologize and he never answered my call. When I texted him, I said “I can't unsay what I have already said, so I will say this. I'm so sorry for accusing you of cheating. You've been good to me, and I just got upset because I feel like you aren't attracted to me anymore. It doesn't excuse what I did, and I'm not expecting you to stop being angry. But I love you. I always will. You're my one.” He responded with “I'm not gonna get over that. I'm not your one anymore I'm blocking your number and I don't wanna hear from you or see you ever again.“ I tried calling him yesterday, and at first I knew he blocked me because it kept going straight to voicemail. Well, I tried calling again a couple of hours later and it was ringing, but he didn’t answer. So I texted him and said I needed to talk to him. I still never heard back, but this evening I tried calling him again to see if he still had me unblocked and it was still ringing. I finally texted his mom and asked for her advice, and she told me she would just give it time and see what happens. All of my friends have also said to give him time and space, but I’m really struggling with that. When we’ve had arguments in the past, we’ve always remained in communication, and this time he has completely shut me out. I don’t know how much time to give him. Can anyone give me advice? Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 Yes. Leave him alone and don't involve his mom. If you want someone to talk to you talk to your mom . Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 What led you to your suspicion? Link to comment
Brittan123 Posted September 23, 2017 Author Share Posted September 23, 2017 What led you to your suspicion? I didn’t have a true reason to be suspicious. I overreacted about sex not being the same because of frustration/emotions/etc. Link to comment
Brittan123 Posted September 23, 2017 Author Share Posted September 23, 2017 The only reason I asked his mom is because she has helped us resolve conflicts before. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 His mom should not be part of the equation unless you are teenagers. And she is HIS support as she is HIS mom. Link to comment
Brittan123 Posted September 23, 2017 Author Share Posted September 23, 2017 His mom should not be part of the equation unless you are teenagers. And she is HIS support as she is HIS mom. How much time do I give him? Do I just wait until he contacts me (if he contacts me)? Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 How much time do I give him? Do I just wait until he contacts me (if he contacts me)? Well, no means no correct? For women and men. He said he didn't want to talk to you anymore so leave him be. Just take this as a lesson of what not to say . Link to comment
MissCanuck Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 Agree with the others, please leave his mother out of this. She shouldn't ever have been involved in any conflict between you two. What exactly were the problems you two have been experiencing with sex? I am guessing he couldn't get hard, or didn't want to have sex with you? I think you need to leave him alone indefinitely now. He is clearly very angry with you and he broke up with you. I don't know the general history between you two but it sounds like things haven't been so great. Is that accurate? Link to comment
Keyman Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 When a guy says, 'I don't want to talk to you', 'I'm blocking you', 'we may as well be done' and many of the other things you have described, he is no longer your boyfriend. And if you start throwing around accusations because you think something is different, but you don't have any actual basis, then you show yourself as being overly paranoid, untrusting and unworthy of being in a relationship with. You can keep trying to contact him, but the more you do, the less likely he is going to be interested in communicating. Link to comment
midsummer Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 I say he is playing you. Don't play. Something tells me that he knew you'd be calling despite of what he said...after all it sounds like he did not block you. Regardless, I would take what he said at face value and stop calling. After all, he is the one that left. Respect yourself. Its the only way he may come around, when you give him space, and thats if you are, at that time, still interested and free. Link to comment
Rustysuit Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 Why would he just leave like that? I sense there's more to it than you're saying. But in general, I agree with what has been said. Leave him alone. He knows where to reach you if he wants. Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 Why would he just leave like that? I sense there's more to it than you're saying. But in general, I agree with what has been said. Leave him alone. He knows where to reach you if he wants. So do I !!!! There is more to this then meets the eye .... was he looking for a way out , cos he certainly took it ! Link to comment
Pto29538 Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 It is cowardly of him that he won't answer your messages or your calls and he has taken the power here . He is also blaming you for accusing him as opposed to actually discussing and working through it with you. Maybe he is too angry at the moment . If he wasn't cheating then he should be wondering why you would ever have thought this and reassuring you that it wasn't the case. At the moment he isn't answering your texts or calls so contacting him again isn't going to make him answer you . The best chance you have is to leave it at least a week and hope to have heard from him . If not you can always try once more apologising for what you said and asking him to call . If he doesn't then you have to leave it . However it's not like you did something unforgivable. So if he does split up with you over this and doesn't work through it with you then I do think there was more than this that caused him to split although he may blame it all on this and throw the blame over on you Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 23, 2017 Share Posted September 23, 2017 People don't have to stay with people who accuse them. My guess is this has happened more than once . If somebody is innocent there's only so many accusations they're going to take before they leave . Link to comment
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