Heartbroken.. Seeking advice to help me move on?

[Woah93]

Same TBH. I just should stop torturing myself with these really sad songs, uhh memories..

For some reason, it's not the ignoring that hurts the most, it's the circumstances, bad timings, mistakes and playing back the good things that got destroyed, if only life had a rewind button.

The last thing I sent her was this...

 

[video=youtube;OsjBhP3ViYY] ]

[Mandala]

Hey, I left for a few hours and look how much is going on on this thread!

I see we have a new musketeer in the bunch... Welcome Woah93! Don't worry, I'm having a moment of clarity, but I've been pretty much MISERABLE for weeks now too.

My to-go song during this depression has been "Wake up alone" by Amy Winehouse...

 

This is a great, compassionate group. You are in the right place.

I'm sorry for your pain. We are all experiencing the same. ❤️

[Schockobaerin]

Hi, the song I relate most is "the winner takes it all" by Abba, its spot on, it was written by one Abba member and the singer was his exwife, other member of the band.. "Chiquitita" is the other song I relate too, it is because my mom sang to me as a child.. But no more sad songs there is a bunch of good songs out there "Sale el sol" by Shakira is very good, "fighter" by Christina Aguilera as well.. Slowly Im recovering my pleasure of dancing, but very slowly. I saw today he went out to a cultural activity with a good friend, and Im here at home crying for him, and thought, is that fair? He is doing the right thing and Im doing the bad thing as simple as that.. It takes time but like Shakira says in her song.. "Un dia despues de la tormenta, cuando menos piensas sale el sol" that means.. One day after the storm, when you are least expecting it, the sun comes out, and so its going to happen.. Look there is another tread in this forum that says "He is back, what now?" and the girl who wrote it, said that after 6 months he came back, and now she is unsure because it was so hard to get over him, but she is still unsure.. So she could get over him, so we can do that as well. NC is about that, to recover ourselves thats all

[Mandala]

Hi, the song I relate most is "the winner takes it all" by Abba, its spot on, it was written by one Abba member and the singer was his exwife, other member of the band.. "Chiquitita" is the other song I relate too, it is because my mom sang to me as a child.. But no more sad songs there is a bunch of good songs out there "Sale el sol" by Shakira is very good, "fighter" by Christina Aguilera as well.. Slowly Im recovering my pleasure of dancing, but very slowly. I saw today he went out to a cultural activity with a good friend, and Im here at home crying for him, and thought, is that fair? He is doing the right thing and Im doing the bad thing as simple as that.. It takes time but like Shakira says in her song.. "Un dia despues de la tormenta, cuando menos piensas sale el sol" that means.. One day after the storm, when you are least expecting it, the sun comes out, and so its going to happen.. Look there is another tread in this forum that says "He is back, what now?" and the girl who wrote it, said that after 6 months he came back, and now she is unsure because it was so hard to get over him, but she is still unsure.. So she could get over him, so we can do that as well. NC is about that, to recover ourselves thats all

 

Yes, it is. I have no doubt one day this will just be a thing of the past... as everything else. The problem is 'the meantime'. But we can only do what we can do, and that's taking care and protect ourselves. We truly are mistreating the very thing we should be nurturing with the most utter respect... our delicate, precious HEART.

If you REALLY think about it... how unfair is that? Wasn't it enough to let someone else crush it? It's our OWN heart. We owe it the responsibility and strength to let it HEAL. ❤️

[glitterfingers]

I'm just numb at this point I guess. I don't even know what I'm feeling. I'm not crying but I'm depressed for sure.... I made myself get up and take a shower at NOON.. Then I got out for a few hours to run some errands... Otherwise my butt has been on the couch all day... I have a birthday party I have to go to tomorrow that I'm dreading because I don't want to get out.... I'll also get my daughter back which that helps.... His lack of response to me today makes me angry because I can't believe he would just ignore me... But then again, tells me what kind of person he is and where I stand (don't) in his life....

 

I don't think you should take it personally. You did decide to end things with him two weeks ago, and he may have resigned himself to that fact. I wouldn't have ended things with him in the first place just based on fears/insecurities, but you know better for next time in the very least that you should push on through the discomfort if the opportunity presents. People's emotions are a very fickle thing. Don't buy into this idea that if you're the one they'll come running back. People can talk themselves into and out of relationships very quickly and sometimes there's nothing you can do about that

 

You should be proud that you were brave and you tried. You have nothing to feel depressed about - you had one foot out the door anyway and you now have closure. You've grown from this experience, and you did what you needed to do

[Helpmesavethis]

I don't think you should take it personally. You did decide to end things with him two weeks ago, and he may have resigned himself to that fact. I wouldn't have ended things with him in the first place just based on fears/insecurities, but you know better for next time in the very least that you should push on through the discomfort if the opportunity presents. People's emotions are a very fickle thing. Don't buy into this idea that if you're the one they'll come running back. People can talk themselves into and out of relationships very quickly and sometimes there's nothing you can do about that

 

You should be proud that you were brave and you tried. You have nothing to feel depressed about - you had one foot out the door anyway and you now have closure. You've grown from this experience, and you did what you needed to do

 

I am glad I sent the message whether it was the right thing to do or not, I don't know. But I had to know if it was salvageable or over. Now I feel more like I know it's over. I can focus on getting thru/over it than holding out any kind of hope for reconciliation... I'm still pretty down and depressed. I'm not full out crying but I've been teary eyed this morning. It hurts. I know I'll be ok though and I truly appreciate everyone here to talk it out with.

[Schockobaerin]

I don't think you should take it personally. You did decide to end things with him two weeks ago, and he may have resigned himself to that fact. I wouldn't have ended things with him in the first place just based on fears/insecurities, but you know better for next time in the very least that you should push on through the discomfort if the opportunity presents. People's emotions are a very fickle thing. Don't buy into this idea that if you're the one they'll come running back. People can talk themselves into and out of relationships very quickly and sometimes there's nothing you can do about that

 

You should be proud that you were brave and you tried. You have nothing to feel depressed about - you had one foot out the door anyway and you now have closure. You've grown from this experience, and you did what you needed to do

 

Im going to give you my two cents here. Do not think we are bitter or hopeless for the fact that we are "giving up". Do you know how hart is it the person that you love suddenly changes and begin to go away, we grew desperate to get their attention without any success and then the bomb fell, in my case I was dumped and he told me "but you were thinking about it" and I was like "yes but I though it would be useless suffering for the both of us". In her case she was braver and took up the plug in a desperate plea to make him "react", and to tell you the truth that is what he wanted, that she does the "dirty work",is "he fault" but in reality he was the one who wanted the relationship to end.

 

All of us, tried to bargain, begged and asked for questions of why and how this happened, and maybe in our case was to give too much love to someone who is either ready nor deserving of it. The most difficult thing to do is to "give up", because is horrible to see that you are losing the person that you love and just watch, but truth is, the more you beg and plead the more rejection you become, because in many cases the "dumper" has made a decision probably based on lack of appreciation, feelings, boredom... They have the power, and the only choice that we have is to stop contact to them to heal, to improve ourselves to gain that power that we lose back, and maybe that other person sees really what is life without us.

Is not that "if we are the one, they will come back" is not as easy as this, but we made the effort in the relationship, the break up was because of the other person, so if the other person decides we are worth of being with them, or finally reacts, then they have to come back, to show some effort, so we cannot get our heart broken again. If they dont come back and/or dont show any effort for it, heartbreak is going to happen again, because a relationship is a partnership were it has to be of equal work.

I really appreciate what you are telling here, and believe me I though like you, and I cannot believe what Im going to say, but sometimes is braver and better to give up on persons that just dont valuate us, we have to learn to love ourselves first, and now we are broken because we gave our hearts to people who simply changed their minds about it, didnt want the effort/responsability and that makes us really sad. I fought with all my power for it, believed in second chances, throw my pride away, just to be taken for granted again and get my heart broken again. Here we are getting force and compassion from strangers that are living the same hell of rejection and pain of unrequired love. All having the "false hope" that they are coming back, but the great hope that everything is going to be fine, because we are learning the lesson that our happiness must not depend on someone else but us. Its a very hard lesson but slowly and step by step we are going to learn it, so things like this doesnt happen again.

[Helpmesavethis]

Im going to give you my two cents here. Do not think we are bitter or hopeless for the fact that we are "giving up". Do you know how hart is it the person that you love suddenly changes and begin to go away, we grew desperate to get their attention without any success and then the bomb fell, in my case I was dumped and he told me "but you were thinking about it" and I was like "yes but I though it would be useless suffering for the both of us". In her case she was braver and took up the plug in a desperate plea to make him "react", and to tell you the truth that is what he wanted, that she does the "dirty work",is "he fault" but in reality he was the one who wanted the relationship to end.

 

All of us, tried to bargain, begged and asked for questions of why and how this happened, and maybe in our case was to give too much love to someone who is either ready nor deserving of it. The most difficult thing to do is to "give up", because is horrible to see that you are losing the person that you love and just watch, but truth is, the more you beg and plead the more rejection you become, because in many cases the "dumper" has made a decision probably based on lack of appreciation, feelings, boredom... They have the power, and the only choice that we have is to stop contact to them to heal, to improve ourselves to gain that power that we lose back, and maybe that other person sees really what is life without us.

Is not that "if we are the one, they will come back" is not as easy as this, but we made the effort in the relationship, the break up was because of the other person, so if the other person decides we are worth of being with them, or finally reacts, then they have to come back, to show some effort, so we cannot get our heart broken again. If they dont come back and/or dont show any effort for it, heartbreak is going to happen again, because a relationship is a partnership were it has to be of equal work.

I really appreciate what you are telling here, and believe me I though like you, and I cannot believe what Im going to say, but sometimes is braver and better to give up on persons that just dont valuate us, we have to learn to love ourselves first, and now we are broken because we gave our hearts to people who simply changed their minds about it, didnt want the effort/responsability and that makes us really sad. I fought with all my power for it, believed in second chances, throw my pride away, just to be taken for granted again and get my heart broken again. Here we are getting force and compassion from strangers that are living the same hell of rejection and pain of unrequired love. All having the "false hope" that they are coming back, but the great hope that everything is going to be fine, because we are learning the lesson that our happiness must not depend on someone else but us. Its a very hard lesson but slowly and step by step we are going to learn it, so things like this doesnt happen again.

 

It hurts to read this but it's the reality of it... I know everything you're saying. I know what I need to do, it's just hard. But now that I have reached out to him and not gotten a response, I feel like it's going to be easier for me to make myself get over it. It just confirms why I haven't heard from him before now anyway... He doesn't feel the same as I do. You can't help who you love. While it kills me it isn't me, I understand. It stings but I know there's someone out there for me and I won't give up on love, just his love...

[Rustysuit]

Im going to give you my two cents here. Do not think we are bitter or hopeless for the fact that we are "giving up". Do you know how hart is it the person that you love suddenly changes and begin to go away, we grew desperate to get their attention without any success and then the bomb fell, in my case I was dumped and he told me "but you were thinking about it" and I was like "yes but I though it would be useless suffering for the both of us". In her case she was braver and took up the plug in a desperate plea to make him "react", and to tell you the truth that is what he wanted, that she does the "dirty work",is "he fault" but in reality he was the one who wanted the relationship to end.

 

All of us, tried to bargain, begged and asked for questions of why and how this happened, and maybe in our case was to give too much love to someone who is either ready nor deserving of it. The most difficult thing to do is to "give up", because is horrible to see that you are losing the person that you love and just watch, but truth is, the more you beg and plead the more rejection you become, because in many cases the "dumper" has made a decision probably based on lack of appreciation, feelings, boredom... They have the power, and the only choice that we have is to stop contact to them to heal, to improve ourselves to gain that power that we lose back, and maybe that other person sees really what is life without us.

Is not that "if we are the one, they will come back" is not as easy as this, but we made the effort in the relationship, the break up was because of the other person, so if the other person decides we are worth of being with them, or finally reacts, then they have to come back, to show some effort, so we cannot get our heart broken again. If they dont come back and/or dont show any effort for it, heartbreak is going to happen again, because a relationship is a partnership were it has to be of equal work.

I really appreciate what you are telling here, and believe me I though like you, and I cannot believe what Im going to say, but sometimes is braver and better to give up on persons that just dont valuate us, we have to learn to love ourselves first, and now we are broken because we gave our hearts to people who simply changed their minds about it, didnt want the effort/responsability and that makes us really sad. I fought with all my power for it, believed in second chances, throw my pride away, just to be taken for granted again and get my heart broken again. Here we are getting force and compassion from strangers that are living the same hell of rejection and pain of unrequired love. All having the "false hope" that they are coming back, but the great hope that everything is going to be fine, because we are learning the lesson that our happiness must not depend on someone else but us. Its a very hard lesson but slowly and step by step we are going to learn it, so things like this doesnt happen again.

 

So true.

 

The hardest thing to do is to give up on the people we love but don't/can't love us back. It's not their fault really, but it's still hard because we're the ones left behind dealing with a million broken pieces inside us. All the while thinking we had something good, we could still have something good if they wanted.

[becksy]

It is so very hard to hear as you did, and as I did, such loving, affirmative words day after day and them be blindsided with the news that his feelings had changed. i find myself questioning my own sanity and yet I know I am resilient and will survive. I just don't get how one's feelings can turn off so quickly -- like a switch -- and I hate to suggest some underlying psychopathology -- that only makes me look bitter. I am hoping time will heal.

[Schockobaerin]

So true.

 

The hardest thing to do is to give up on the people we love but don't/can't love us back. It's not their fault really, but it's still hard because we're the ones left behind dealing with a million broken pieces inside us. All the while thinking we had something good, we could still have something good if they wanted.

 

To fall out of love can happen, and nobody is forced to love us back, but in my case is his fault, because of his fears he didnt want to fight for me and that hurts me the most, love is a choice and if you let yourself be loved is very easy.. The big mistake is to give too much too soon, and therefore we are took for granted, pretty sad eh? Now my biggest fear is to become very careful and not to trust again, but Im fighting against it, very hard. Thank you for your words

[Helpmesavethis]

It is so very hard to hear as you did, and as I did, such loving, affirmative words day after day and them be blindsided with the news that his feelings had changed. i find myself questioning my own sanity and yet I know I am resilient and will survive. I just don't get how one's feelings can turn off so quickly -- like a switch -- and I hate to suggest some underlying psychopathology -- that only makes me look bitter. I am hoping time will heal.

 

And that's why I've had such a hard time. How can someone say and do all the things they did and then bam, shut those feelings off?!? I sure as heck cannot... Welcome. We're all here to support one another thru this and we will all make it. I have felt like a crazy person inside for the last 2 weeks... I know it'll pass....

[Woah93]

Hey guys, hope your doing better, I feel a little bit lighter today, yesterday was really bad...

I have a really hard time expressing emotions and allowing myself to cry, I cry maybe 2 times a year, I came across this song today and the beauty just struck me and I actually cried a little, but not tears of sadness

Isn't it funny that when you are in love, or suffering a heartbreak, a lot of the movies, songs you hear, are suddenly about you...

 

"I hate to see you cry

Laying there in that position

There's things you need to hear

So turn off your tears and listen

 

Pain throws your heart to the ground

Love turns the whole thing around

No, it won't all go the way, it should

But I know the heart of life is good

 

You know it's nothing new

Bad news never had good timing

But then the circle of your friends

Will defend the silver lining

 

Pain throws your heart to the ground

Love turns the whole thing around

No, it won't all go the way, it should

But I know the heart of life is good"

 

 

Stay strong guys

 

[video=youtube;3uA_ya8DcLs] ]

[Helpmesavethis]

I am not listening to your songs. Hahahaha. I find it easier to listen to upbeat songs. Like some Miranda Lambert, Pink, get over you kind of songs. Otherwise o do and cry and cry more because sad songs bring back too many memories and yes, every single one seems to be about us... Rrrrggg. I'm still hanging in there today. Just taking one day at a time and I am again not feeling good but a little better.. I just keep telling myself it's over. If he wanted to be with me, he would. He doesn't even have the decency to respond to my message so why am I so hung up on him.... Gotta make myself get thru this...

[Woah93]

It's not a sad song to me though, it's like, yeah what happened sucks, but your friends are there, love is still there, life goes on kind of song... I get you though, listen to what helps you... In my situation I stopped sending anything 3 weeks ago because the indifference, lack of reply, being slung back and forth between hope and rejection hurt me too much, it's like you say if they wanted to work things out, they know how to reach us, and they would have...

[Mandala]

I still feel like a total psycho.

I go from thinking 'NC is the best thing to do and I'm sticking to it!' ...to... 'I need to call him right in this moment' in the blink of an eye.

No matter what I do, the knot behind my throat will not go away. I can feel the tears be ready behind my eyes at any given moment.

I can't accept he changed his mind and attitude in A FREAKING DAY.

is wrong with people???

 

PS: sorry guys for bringing the conversation down while you are trying to feel better, but as you know, this is literally the only place where I can vent. I appreciate all of you and your patience. At the moment, you are my anchor.

Thank you. ❤️

[Woah93]

Yeah it's crazy, I guess for some people love is just a good feeling and when someone stops providing that good feeling they walk away. I have no other explanation for it

[Mandala]

Yeah it's crazy, I guess for some people love is just a good feeling and when someone stops providing that good feeling they walk away. I have no other explanation for it

 

I know, I don't either. I guess I'm suffering for the both of us.

[Schockobaerin]

I still feel like a total psycho.

I go from thinking 'NC is the best thing to do and I'm sticking to it!' ...to... 'I need to call him right in this moment' in the blink of an eye.

No matter what I do, the knot behind my throat will not go away. I can feel the tears be ready behind my eyes at any given moment.

I can't accept he changed his mind and attitude in A FREAKING DAY.

is wrong with people???

 

PS: sorry guys for bringing the conversation down while you are trying to feel better, but as you know, this is literally the only place where I can vent. I appreciate all of you and your patience. At the moment, you are my anchor.

Thank you. ❤️

 

Dear, you are detoxing, is normal how are you feeling, its ok to feel like this and come here to vent out your emotions, but Im going to tell you something that has helped me to avoid calling him.

You have two ways:

1) Contact him, stalk him, call him a lot of times: There you are going to "get your fix" and sometimes he is going to answer and mostly not, you know why? Because if you do this you reek of "desperation, clinginess and neediness" and that is going to reassure him that it was a good decision to get away from you, because now you are showing your true colors, as simple as that. He is going to come to despise you and in the worst case scenario he is going to resort to blocking you and that my dear is going to be worst, you are not only going to lose your dignity but all chances to get back together with him. Another case: He comes back to you, but is still not sure, then sooner rather than later he is going to take you from granted and ditch you again(that happened to me), you know why? Because he knows you are always to be there, and he is going to feel overwhelmed by your attemps, if he wants you back but is still unsure, GIVE HIM TIME to reconquest you.. That was my biggest mistake, and here are am again heartbroken. This way also prevents you of healing and empowering yourself.

 

2) NC, be cool: This way you are not only going to heal, but if you have any chance of getting back with him, you are going to give him space and time to miss you and really appreciate what is losing without you. The majority of this sudden breakups (mine included) is fear and pressure, give him time. But the most important, give yourself time to think about it, to heal, to love him less, to love yourself more, to grow. If he doesnt come back, hell, then why the hell do you want someone who doesnt love you or doesnt want to fight for you (Im still struggling to accept this fact). In your special case, you must remember that your ex is in the caribbean and his head is somewhere there, the least he needs now is a crazy needy exgf. This way is the most difficult, from my experience I can attest to it, but is the only and the best option if you want to heal, because my dear you must think on yourself.

 

What do you think about all this? This is going to get better, just try to distract yourself, watch movies, pray, try to meditate, cry a lot, talk alone(as you were with him), write... Its like a detoxing and you are having withdrawals, Im still having them after 4 weeks of the breakup, LC and since last weekend strict NC, it hurts like hell, and everytime my phone rings, I have the hope, its him, but I know that doesnt make any sense, because we both agreed to go NC for my healing and from his healing as well. Dont make the mistake of being too avaliable (I didnt want to listen and here am I in this painful situation). I promise you everything is going to be fine..

[Helpmesavethis]

I still feel like a total psycho.

I go from thinking 'NC is the best thing to do and I'm sticking to it!' ...to... 'I need to call him right in this moment' in the blink of an eye.

No matter what I do, the knot behind my throat will not go away. I can feel the tears be ready behind my eyes at any given moment.

I can't accept he changed his mind and attitude in A FREAKING DAY.

is wrong with people???

 

PS: sorry guys for bringing the conversation down while you are trying to feel better, but as you know, this is literally the only place where I can vent. I appreciate all of you and your patience. At the moment, you are my anchor.

Thank you. ❤️

 

You'll get thru this. I feel so much stronger in just the few days I've been on here with everyone's support. It still hurts. I'm still miserable but I know I'll get thru this. I know I deserve someone who wouldn't leave me feeling like this. As do you..

[Mandala]

Dear, you are detoxing, is normal how are you feeling, its ok to feel like this and come here to vent out your emotions, but Im going to tell you something that has helped me to avoid calling him.

You have two ways:

1) Contact him, stalk him, call him a lot of times: There you are going to "get your fix" and sometimes he is going to answer and mostly not, you know why? Because if you do this you reek of "desperation, clinginess and neediness" and that is going to reassure him that it was a good decision to get away from you, because now you are showing your true colors, as simple as that. He is going to come to despise you and in the worst case scenario he is going to resort to blocking you and that my dear is going to be worst, you are not only going to lose your dignity but all chances to get back together with him. Another case: He comes back to you, but is still not sure, then sooner rather than later he is going to take you from granted and ditch you again(that happened to me), you know why? Because he knows you are always to be there, and he is going to feel overwhelmed by your attemps, if he wants you back but is still unsure, GIVE HIM TIME to reconquest you.. That was my biggest mistake, and here are am again heartbroken. This way also prevents you of healing and empowering yourself.

 

2) NC, be cool: This way you are not only going to heal, but if you have any chance of getting back with him, you are going to give him space and time to miss you and really appreciate what is losing without you. The majority of this sudden breakups (mine included) is fear and pressure, give him time. But the most important, give yourself time to think about it, to heal, to love him less, to love yourself more, to grow. If he doesnt come back, hell, then why the hell do you want someone who doesnt love you or doesnt want to fight for you (Im still struggling to accept this fact). In your special case, you must remember that your ex is in the caribbean and his head is somewhere there, the least he needs now is a crazy needy exgf. This way is the most difficult, from my experience I can attest to it, but is the only and the best option if you want to heal, because my dear you must think on yourself.

 

What do you think about all this? This is going to get better, just try to distract yourself, watch movies, pray, try to meditate, cry a lot, talk alone(as you were with him), write... Its like a detoxing and you are having withdrawals, Im still having them after 4 weeks of the breakup, LC and since last weekend strict NC, it hurts like hell, and everytime my phone rings, I have the hope, its him, but I know that doesnt make any sense, because we both agreed to go NC for my healing and from his healing as well. Dont make the mistake of being too avaliable (I didnt want to listen and here am I in this painful situation). I promise you everything is going to be fine..

 

What can I say, you are 100% right.

I have already read what you wrote at least 4 times. I keep going back to it to keep me motivated. I'm aware of all of this, but I keep wanting to forget it.

And it's true that I'm going through detox. It's funny because that's actually what I keep telling myself when I feel the urge to call him: "You are a love addict and he's your drug. You must resist. It is not him that you miss right now, it's the fix."

This is pretty crazy considering that I've never been addicted to any substance, but I had to come to terms that this is still a form of addiction and I have to get it out of my system. At all costs.

[Mandala]

You'll get thru this. I feel so much stronger in just the few days I've been on here with everyone's support. It still hurts. I'm still miserable but I know I'll get thru this. I know I deserve someone who wouldn't leave me feeling like this. As do you..

 

I know you are, I've seen how in a few days you were able to get stronger. I admire the work you are doing. And we CERTAINLY deserve someone that doesn't leave us in this misery. Love is not painful. ❤️

[hs782356]

I'm also in a terrible spot today, I feel incredibly alone. Oh God, how hard it is, I can't stop crying...

 

I feel that too and I feel helpless I don't know what to do.. I just feel I will be okay once I have him back and I just want him back despite everything.

[hs782356]

I still feel like a total psycho.

I go from thinking 'NC is the best thing to do and I'm sticking to it!' ...to... 'I need to call him right in this moment' in the blink of an eye.

No matter what I do, the knot behind my throat will not go away. I can feel the tears be ready behind my eyes at any given moment.

I can't accept he changed his mind and attitude in A FREAKING DAY.

is wrong with people???

 

PS: sorry guys for bringing the conversation down while you are trying to feel better, but as you know, this is literally the only place where I can vent. I appreciate all of you and your patience. At the moment, you are my anchor.

Thank you. ❤️

 

I feel the exact same thing. Everyday.. I have tried NC but then I fall back to the panic of losing him. I just want to give him everything and want to scream that I love him very much and just please love back. I don't know how will I go past this. I feel so weak and I guess I need a lot of support.

[Schockobaerin]

What can I say, you are 100% right.

I have already read what you wrote at least 4 times. I keep going back to it to keep me motivated. I'm aware of all of this, but I keep wanting to forget it.

And it's true that I'm going through detox. It's funny because that's actually what I keep telling myself when I feel the urge to call him: "You are a love addict and he's your drug. You must resist. It is not him that you miss right now, it's the fix."

This is pretty crazy considering that I've never been addicted to any substance, but I had to come to terms that this is still a form of addiction and I have to get it out of my system. At all costs.

 

And talking about crazy ladies: Here am I at midnight, crying because I miss so much, and asking myself why doesnt he love me? Why does he prefer his ex? Why Im still loving him, wanting him? I feel like a looser and sometimes Im soo weak that Im tempted to call him and propose to be his friends with benefits.. I know I cannot do that, but this feeling is so awful. I have to read myself again to reassure myself this is the RIGHT PATH, but how it hurts I hope tomorrow is going to get better and better, because this is too hard. You are right, is an addiction. Look mine is a dane, and when I see something danish, I begin to cry, is horrible, but I like you are going to survive this.. P.s. another love junkie