moomin1 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 We were fighting, i said some mean stuff, he snapped, said he didn't want to be with me anymore, but then didn't want me to leave after. these are some very confusing mixed signals. we have been on the rocks for a few months after a breakdown of trust and have therefor been arguing quite a bit. the longer the arguments have been persistent, the less patience he has had for my emotional reactions (crying). he is an avoidant personality type. i am an anxious personality type. the main thing that is bugging me, is that during this fight where he stated that he doesn't want to be with me anymore, that he can't do this fighting anymore. is then why would he go on to comforting me and hugging me for hours, while we watched a bloody film. . . and when i said something nice to him at about 4 hours later he then said "i still cant be in this relationship anymore" i got upset, tried to leave. and he didn't want me to because "its the middle of the night" (i live five minutes away) I left at 2.am. its been a 6 days, he still hasn't contacted me. what is going on Link to comment
Knight2001 Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 hi, i could be wrong but maybe he's been looking for an out and the things you said are his way of getting out. Link to comment
Keyman Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 Breakups are not the easiest things to initiate and can cause back and forth behaviour. I would suggest that this is what is happening and that this is in fact the end of this relationship. Link to comment
j.man Posted July 10, 2017 Share Posted July 10, 2017 What was the argument? What was the breaking of trust? Sounds like he's done. He was just trying to be decent and civil about it all that night. Link to comment
moomin1 Posted July 10, 2017 Author Share Posted July 10, 2017 i have contacted him and asked if we can talk, he is coming to meet me after work later Link to comment
moomin1 Posted July 10, 2017 Author Share Posted July 10, 2017 surely if he wanted nothing to do with me he would just say so in that message and not come and meet me Link to comment
moomin1 Posted July 12, 2017 Author Share Posted July 12, 2017 Breakups are not the easiest things to initiate and can cause back and forth behaviour. I would suggest that this is what is happening and that this is in fact the end of this relationship. you were very very wrong Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted July 12, 2017 Share Posted July 12, 2017 We were fighting, i said some mean stuff, he snapped, said he didn't want to be with me anymore, but then didn't want me to leave after. these are some very confusing mixed signals. we have been on the rocks for a few months after a breakdown of trust and have therefor been arguing quite a bit. the longer the arguments have been persistent, the less patience he has had for my emotional reactions (crying). he is an avoidant personality type. i am an anxious personality type. the main thing that is bugging me, is that during this fight where he stated that he doesn't want to be with me anymore, that he can't do this fighting anymore. is then why would he go on to comforting me and hugging me for hours, while we watched a bloody film. . . and when i said something nice to him at about 4 hours later he then said "i still cant be in this relationship anymore" i got upset, tried to leave. and he didn't want me to because "its the middle of the night" (i live five minutes away) I left at 2.am. its been a 6 days, he still hasn't contacted me. what is going on said he didn't want to be with me anymore, said he didn't want to be with me anymore, He said that twice only the second time he actually said: I still can't be in this relationship anymore. What is going on He broke up with you, that's what is going on. He broke up with you due to whatever trust issues going on have caused the two of you to lose your emotional connection and the only way you know how to relate now (it would seem) is through animosity. He's giving you the gift of zero contact (so it seems) so that you can get over him and he can get over you. He comforted you when he wouldn't let you leave while upset... that is normal for anyone who isn't a sociopath to do. What caused the trust issues? i have contacted him and asked if we can talk, he is coming to meet me after work later What do you expect to happen due to this "talk?" Link to comment
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