Krankor Posted July 4, 2017 Share Posted July 4, 2017 I'm a 40 year old man. Never married, no kids. Throughout my twenties and early 30s, that was how I wanted it. In my early to mid thirties I let myself get stuck in a bad relationship with a very controlling and at times verbally abusive woman. After that, I was just so glad to be rid of her and single again that I hardly dated for a couple of years. However, in the past just over a year now, I've been dumped twice after two really strong, promising starts. Just a little background which may or may not be relevant. I thought I took the last one pretty well. Waited a couple of months, then got back on the app I met her on as well as a couple others--may as well cast as wide a net as possible, right? However, I'm finding that I just can't seem to muster any sort of enthusiasm. I'll message a woman or she'll message me, we'll start talking back and forth a bit, and then I'll just kind of lose steam and end up ghosting her. I don't like doing that--I think it's kind of rude, actually, though common--but I don't exactly mean to do it. I don't make the conscious decision that I'm not interested; I'm just not that motivated and don't end up getting back around to anyone. Also, when I message someone or whatever and get blown off I've found myself taking it really personally. I'm finding that I don't seem to have the energy or will to date. When I think about taking the time to get to know a new person I just feel the energy draining from my body. It all came really easy and naturally with my last girlfriend. Now, nobody is really grabbing my interest. There was one who I was talking to before and liked, who hit me up when I came back on. Now, I'm just not feeling it. The thing is, I WANT a girlfriend. I want a relationship. I want someone to talk to most days and to do things with and, frankly, to have that physical connection with. But I don't seem to be willing to put in the work. So, I've taken down all my profiles, figuring I just need a break. But I don't know if that's the best thing. I mean, I'm not getting any younger. Maybe I just need to suck it up and keep trying until something sticks. Any thoughts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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