Loralora Posted May 20, 2017 Author Share Posted May 20, 2017 Try to relax and not think about it as that will cause you to tense up and make it difficult. I have trouble with my partner sometimes i just try to completely relax and my partner spends a lot of time kissing me and touching to help relax me. Try getting him to give you oral sex as that helps you loosen up a lot too. Try oral sex and maybe get him to insert 1 finger to start with and in time build up to sex. Hope this helps x Maybe before trying to do it I should have had him put in the finger first. Because he tried it with the finger only after it was sore... Thanks! Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted May 20, 2017 Share Posted May 20, 2017 Don't you go for Pap smears and regular exams?! How has this gone unaddressed this long?! I'm so horrified at the idea you'd consider having your bf do make shift surgery rather than see a doctor. I'm not even kidding, if the level of treatment and education on female health is this low your country, and you are a medical resident even.... ( insert curse here) I'd be doing everything in my power to move. I had my first pap at 15 due to issues with my menstruation, and didn't have sex til I was 21. At 27, how in the hell could a doc not haven't noticed an issue when you go for paps?! Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 20, 2017 Author Share Posted May 20, 2017 "Estrogen naturally primes the tissue to stretch and wear away as girls develop, and the shape and size also varies from person to person. Ironically, the least common coronal formation is the imperforate hymen that stretches all but completely across the vaginal canal - in other words, how we typically misconceptualize it. By the time many women have sex, that vaginal corona may have devolved from a doughnut to an unnoticeable rubber band all by itself. Not to mention the myriad ways girls can stretch and tear the vaginal corona sans sexual activity, including bike riding, horseback riding, inserting tampons, masturbation and dancing (don’t tell the “Footloose” preacher). Weighing that utter uselessness against its cultural impact on women’s lives, the hymen might be the most overrated flap of flesh in the human body, the anatomical equivalent of a sexually charged appendix." From a Huff Post Article Interesting post. Thanks I agree that it is the anatomical equivalent of the appendix.. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 20, 2017 Author Share Posted May 20, 2017 Don't you go for Pap smears and regular exams?! How has this gone unaddressed this long?! I'm so horrified at the idea you'd consider having your bf do make shift surgery rather than see a doctor. I'm not even kidding, if the level of treatment and education on female health is this low your country, and you are a medical resident even.... ( insert curse here) I'd be doing everything in my power to move. I had my first pap at 15 due to issues with my menstruation, and didn't have sex til I was 21. At 27, how in the hell could a doc not haven't noticed an issue when you go for paps?! I do exams sometimes...but not often.. The last check up was an ultrasould of the reproductive organs.. Once I did a smear.. Link to comment
LaHermes Posted May 20, 2017 Share Posted May 20, 2017 And Lora, when you had the gynae examination or smear, was no comment made that you had that type of hymen. And if not, why not? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted May 20, 2017 Share Posted May 20, 2017 Is your boyfriend already a licensed doctor? If not, please do NOT have your boyfriend "cut it" for you!!! Link to comment
LaHermes Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 I think Lora said earlier he is a cardiologist. But it is also a question of ethics that people do not have their nearest and dearest who are doctors treat them for anything. It is usual to go to someone else, not a BF and not related. No way should the BF even attempt a cut in the hymen. Leaving the physical aspect aside, I also think the OP might benefit from not just the gynae's procedure but also from a good talk with her....... You had a smear....once! You are in the medical sector, and surely you know that frequent smears are MOST important. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 And Lora, when you had the gynae examination or smear, was no comment made that you had that type of hymen. And if not, why not? Nope no comment. She just asked "you never had intercourse?" Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 Is your boyfriend already a licensed doctor? If not, please do NOT have your boyfriend "cut it" for you!!! Yes he is a licensed doctor. A very good one. He is now a resident in vascular surgery. Meaning he just started his specialization in surgery. He has just started training to be a surgeon. But I don't think I'll make him do it it's too much pressure on him and me. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 You know you need to go for paps regularly even if you aren't having sex, right?! As someone whose life was saved from early intervention that wouldn't have happened without those exams, this really hits me in the heart. Your HEALTH is the first priority. Don't you think? Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 But it is also a question of ethics that people do not have their nearest and dearest who are doctors treat them for anything. It is usual to go to someone else, not a BF and not related. You're right.. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 You know you need to go for paps regularly even if you aren't having sex, right?! As someone whose life was saved from early intervention that wouldn't have happened without those exams, this really hits me in the heart. Your HEALTH is the first priority. Don't you think? Yes I know the importance of regular paps.. Health should always be the first priority. It seems like I care for everypme else around me more than for myself Link to comment
LaHermes Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 I can't believe this. She asked you that when it must have been obvious to her that you hadn't. Or do you mean she said it as a statement, not a question. I feel so grateful for the gynaecologist (male) I have had over all these years and years........ You say: "It seems like I care for everypme else around me more than for myself" Bad idea, Lora. If you are to practice what is a demanding and rigorous profession you will need to be in top health yourself, and ensure that by being in good health that you can THEN look after others. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 I can't believe this. She asked you that when it must have been obvious to her that you hadn't. Or do you mean she said it as a statement, not a question. I feel so grateful for the gynaecologist (male) I have had over all these years and years........ She said it as a statement; I might have to change my doctor.. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 Yes I know the importance of regular paps.. Health should always be the first priority. It seems like I care for everypme else around me more than for myself Aww , you're important! I'm glad you understand what I was saying and the intention behind it. I'm not trying to make you feel bad. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 I'm not trying to make you feel bad. I know...thanks Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 Can anyone else PLEASE SHARE THEIR VIRGINITY LOSING EXPERIENCE. And ANY TIPS that can help... THANK YOU ALL Link to comment
Seraphim Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 Mine was not happy either. I was raped as a 13 year old. Hurt like hell. I am sorry you are having a hard time. Link to comment
LaHermes Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 Lora, TWO of us already did, tell you our experience!!! I don't know what you mean by "tips". If you already have a physical condition of the hymen that prevents penetration then no tip any of us can give is going to remedy that. The hymen is quite elastic of course, so maybe if you are very anxious, or he is not all that expert, that might have something to do with it. I don't know. Look, what you don't need is the "jack-hammer" approach. Passion and gentleness can work wonders. I greatly fear Lora that you and he are approaching this experience rather as if it were some sort of clinical experiment....it should not be like that. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 Mine was not happy either. I was raped as a 13 year old. Hurt like hell. I am sorry you are having a hard time. Thank you for sharing. I am very sorry this has happened to you..I can't believe how many awful people there are in the world! To be honest the pain I went through felt like being raped. The only difference is when I told him to stop he stopped. Also I am very passionate about him and dryness is not a problem I have down there ... Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 I greatly fear Lora that you and he are approaching this experience rather as if it were some sort of clinical experiment....it should not be like that. Why do you think that? Link to comment
LaHermes Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 Well, you did say you were thinking of getting him to make a slit (surgically) in the membrane........ Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 Well, you did say you were thinking of getting him to make a slit (surgically) in the membrane........ Only after going through hell. That's like the last desperate approach I thought of; but no I don't think I could make him do that... I really am passionate about him and I am not dry down there... I MIGHT try one last time before going to the doctor. Or I might go straight without trying again.. If I do try again I might try drinking some wine first... Link to comment
mustlovedogs Posted May 21, 2017 Share Posted May 21, 2017 Can anyone else PLEASE SHARE THEIR VIRGINITY LOSING EXPERIENCE. And ANY TIPS that can help... THANK YOU ALL Sex shouldn't hurt. My first time was painless. The tip? GO TO THE DOCTOR. You are in medical school. You know better. Strangers online cannot fix this. Link to comment
Loralora Posted May 21, 2017 Author Share Posted May 21, 2017 Sex shouldn't hurt. My first time was painless. The tip? GO TO THE DOCTOR. You are in medical school. You know better. Strangers online cannot fix this. Yeah... Just wanted to know other people's experiences also and compare... From what you all tell me, the first try should be enough if no medical aid is needed. I appreciate everyones comments Link to comment
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