Hurting a partner because people told you too...

[Ccottom]

So it is my partners birthday today. We broke up for 3 weeks but reunited 2 weeks ago (over her backing out of moving in together and losing me a lot of money in the process).

 

The place she worked, she thought she had made all these friends and when we broke up, they all pushed her to get with this guy. It turned out that they only befriended her, while she was with me, to force her and this guy, their friend together. This guy was the most 'in the closet' guy ever known. My gf actually thought he was gay and came out when we broke up, and didnt see that they were forcing them together.

 

She told him no, she said she didnt want to be with him, we reunited and started back up again. Well this group ( 2 girls, a screaming in your face homosexual guy, and this in the closet guy) started writing abusive comments on twitter about her, sending her abusive texts about how much of a she is and writing stuff about her on their facebooks. I was fuming, this is the point i would step in and say something or do something because these guys are ganging up and bullying my partner, but she said dont shes going to leave them to it, even though she cried her eyes out to me.

 

Well last night, these guys text her and asked her to go for drinks, as if they hadnt text her abuse and put messages about her on social media, and she said yeah and went along with it.

 

I was so angry about it, i wrote her a birthday message for text (she went to visit family this weekend without me). And sent it on facebook too, i put how much i love her and were together through everything and no other guy, straight or gay can take that away.

 

Well she was fine with it their until the gay guy started telling her he hopes she dies etc, she decided she was going to delete the post because this guy has taken offence to it.

 

To me, i am the only one that stood by her, i am the only one that has backed her, i was the one that sat there all night while she cried to me about how they were talking to and about her. And then i say something and she removed it because she didnt want to hurt the feelings of these bullies. Shes basically sacrificed me and my feelings etc standing up for her because these other guys told her to taie it down. She said and i quote "i dont want to lose thek as friends".

 

I dont know how to feel or how im supposed to feel with this, im so confused, hurt and angry.

[bulletproof]

Based on this and your last thread, this is a really, really unhealthy relationship. Please get yourself some help.

[DancingFool]

She hangs out with them because for whatever reason she is enjoying the drama. Your knight in shining armor, I will stand up for her and save her and she'll think me a hero is sadly misplaced. She is full of drama - crying to you, hanging out with them - all pure games and she is the center of this vortex. Until she decides that it's no longer fun for her, you are not going to save her from herself nor does she actually want to be saved.

[Wiseman2]

This part seems odd. You are not spending her birthday together but home without her...posting stuff on her social media pages? Let her fight her own battles and decide on her own friends. Why cross boundaries and complicate things. She didn't ask for your intervention.

I was so angry about it, i wrote her a birthday message for text (she went to visit family this weekend without me). And sent it on facebook too

[Tanzi]

I am soooooo confused by your post. I think I must be having a blonde moment .....

 

So is this guy gay or not?

 

I guess it doesn't matter. These people are mindless, immature bullies but your comment on FB was equally mindless and immature. It's not that she doesn't want to hurt their feelings. It just makes her life much easier if she has them as friends as opposed to enemies.

 

This all sounds like ridiculous drama and you put yourself right in the middle of it. I'm not sure what you expecting.

[Ccottom]

This part seems odd. You are not spending her birthday together but home without her...posting stuff on her social media pages? Let her fight her own battles and decide on her own friends. Why cross boundaries and complicate things. She didn't ask for your intervention.

 

Nothing confusing, we both live in the same city for work, mid 20s, her family live in a different city and my family live in a third city. She spent her bday with family, i visited my family. Theres no room for me there.

[Ccottom]

I am soooooo confused by your post. I think I must be having a blonde moment .....

 

So is this guy gay or not?

 

.

 

There are two guys, one is screaming in your face gay, one is so blatantly gay but in denial, everyone knows he is gay but he wont admit it

[ParisPaulette]

Anyone who does that is a sheep that is a willing to be led by the nose, and usually not as into you as they claim to be.

 

I'm sorry, but tell your girl to grow a spine and learn to have boundaries, and come look you up when she does. This is an immaturity issue. She's still busy trying to sit with who she thinks are the cool kids in class to really care about anyone but herself.

 

If you want a sane normal relationship with someone who isn't letting themselves get manipulated at the drop of a pin then all I can tell you is to walk away.

[boltnrun]

So this woman went ballistic because you "liked" some friends' photos on Facebook, and yet she goes out for drinks with other men?

 

Why again do you stay with her? Besides the old stand by, "I love her".

[Tanzi]

So this woman went ballistic because you "liked" some friends' photos on Facebook, and yet she goes out for drinks with other men?

 

Why again do you stay with her? Besides the old stand by, "I love her".

 

Ohhhh, THAT thread. I didn't realise it was the same poster.

 

Different day, different drama.

 

This is a ridiculous relationship.

[Capricorn3]

Based on this and your last thread, this is a really, really unhealthy relationship. Please get yourself some help.

 

Totally agree!

[jennylove]

Ehhh, my eyes are now crossed after reading such madness. Dude, let her go. Liberate yourself from this madness. Life is so precious, don't waste your life on shiot like this.