jborrito Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 So I dated my ex for almost three years. We broke up in august but got back together in october but broke up again in november. We broke up because we were fighting alot and i was unhappy. He said he didnt want to lose me but made no effort to be with me again so I moved on. We kept in contact and would still say we love each other and such. I tried to get back with him in December but he said it was too late because i was seeing someone else. He said he wanted to be alone but i found out he was asking one of my friends out. Now we don't talk and i am dating someone else. Im really happy but i still miss my ex. He will message me every once in a while but he never keeps the conversation going. In demcember he said he would think about giving us another chance but he was upset I "moved on so fast" which i find hyprocritical. I don't know what to do. I really like my new bf but i still love my ex and want to be with him but i dont think he will ever want to be with me again?? I have always gotten mixed signals from him. Link to comment
mhowe Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Fighting is a sign of incompatibility. So is the break up/make up cycle. Leave him as an ex, break up with the current guy and give being single.a shot. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Accept that it's perfectly normal to miss ex's and still have some residual feelings for them. It doesn't however mean you two should reconcile and be together. I still really miss (parts) of an ex that was incredibly bad for me. I'd rather poke my eye before I'd get back together with him I am dating some one new. My feelings for my ex take nothing away from the new person in my life. Learn to compartmentalize. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted January 27, 2016 Share Posted January 27, 2016 Fighting is a sign of incompatibility. So is the break up/make up cycle. Leave him as an ex, break up with the current guy and give being single.a shot. Not to mention that you obviously did move on to a new boyfriend far too soon. You haven't processed the breakup nor have you cleansed your ex from your heart and mind yet because you keep talking to him which makes you hope he'll come back. Go zero contact, block him so he can't keep you stagnated. Don't string along the new guy either. You're just using him for the equivalent of a human bandaid to help you with the emotional pain you feel from the loss of your on again/off again ex. Be single for a while and work on being able to be happy in your own skin. Link to comment
jborrito Posted February 1, 2016 Author Share Posted February 1, 2016 Im not stringing anyone along. Its been almost five months since me and my ex broke up. I dont contact my ex but he will contact me but then stop responding. Also fighting is normal in every relationship. The fighting was not the issue, it was what we fought about, him doing drugs and etc. I still love him and miss him alot but im really happy with my new boyfriend. I just want to know if i should keep moving on or if reconciliation is possibly with my ex?? Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 Also fighting is normal in every relationship. The fighting was not the issue, it was what we fought about, him doing drugs and etc. I'm not saying this maliciously but if you are with a good man that treats you well and your are wondering if you should go back to a drug user, that you argued with often and who didn't make you happy due to his drug use... then there is some codependency issues that you would do well to address with a therapist proficient in dealing with the codependent in nature. You may "love and miss" him a lot (which makes you not totally invested in your current bf, btw) but that is certainly no reason to go back to someone who isn't going to make a good partner due to his addictions. Do you "love" your current boyfriend? You are quick to tell us you are happy with him but you've yet to tell us you love him. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 I really like my new bf but i still love my ex and want to be with him Really not fair to the current bf, is it? Link to comment
jborrito Posted February 2, 2016 Author Share Posted February 2, 2016 All he would do is smoke weed. It is not like he treated me badly because he didn't. I don't know how i feel about my current boyfriend. Ive had feelings for him for awhile and is one of the reasons I broke up with my ex. I just keep having set backs when im trying to move forward i guess. Link to comment
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