how do you know? please open

[gem2]

Hi,

 

How do you know that the person you're with is the one?

I've been with my bf for 4.5 years already and i no doubt, love him to death, he's my best friend and at the end of the day after all the ups and downs, we complete each other.

Problem being, i met another guy recently and i haven't stopped thinking of this new guy i met. I look forward to seeing him and when i do, i get really shy and nervous and butterflies like i would when i first started dating my bf.

How do i know my bf is THE ONE? how do i know i'm not missing out on this new guy and that he's not the one?

What do you do when you feel intrigued by the new and a bit accustomed to the old?

Last thing i want to do is break up with my bf to try this new guy out then let's say i don't like the new guy, i lost my guy.

It would kill me to one day see my bf with another woman.

i don't know what to do. i feel very conflicted.

i love my bf, but can't stop thinking of the new guy.

i don't want to lose my bf/best friend, but i don't want to pass the chance to get to know the new guy.

but how do you get to know someone new when you're taken?

 

 

[Clinton]

You don't get to know someone new when you're taken.

 

You're boyfriends not the one. Not with thoughts like these going through your head.

 

Break up and go find someone else. But don't be a hoe. Break up first. You don't get to have your cake and eat it too.

[HeartGoesOn]

i love my bf, but can't stop thinking of the new guy.

i don't want to lose my bf/best friend, but i don't want to pass the chance to get to know the new guy.

 

No offense, but that's called "having your cake and eating it too." This scenario has the potential to backfire, where you would end up standing alone.

 

You can't have it both ways, therefore it's time to do some serious thinking.

[sara-pezzini]

You know that he's the one if you don't get thoughts and feelings like that. So my guess is that your bf isn't the one or else you wouldn't think about this other guy so much.

Crushes can happen but if you're really thinking about them and looking forward to seeing them and getting shy and think about "trying them out" whatever that means, then you're in trouble

[sara-pezzini]

And reading your other post you made out with him so that goes beyond an innocent crush. You cheated on your bf!

[RainyCoast]

wow, i just read those.

 

your boyfriend is online sexting, doesn't see himself comitting for at least another decade, and you're cheating too and have the nerve to ask how to proceed while staying with your boyfriend as well.

 

neither of you is the one for the other.

 

edit: or maybe you're perfect for each other. i can't decide.

[mhowe]

Your bf isn't "the one".

[Helpexpressme]

Stay single girlfriend!

[Tanzi]

Hi,

 

How do you know that the person you're with is the one?

 

Problem being, i met another guy recently and i haven't stopped thinking of this new guy i met. I look forward to seeing him and when i do, i get really shy and nervous and butterflies like i would when i first started dating my bf.

 

If your BF was "the one" you wouldn't question it. You certainly wouldn't be obsessing over another guy.

 

but how do you get to know someone new when you're taken?

 

You don't. It doesn't work like at .... at least it shouldn't do anyway. That's called cheating but if, as pointed out above, you have already made out with him then you have already cheated on him .... and if your bf is sexting other girls the it seems that neiither of you are "the one".

[ParisPaulette]

You don't, there is no mythical "the one." You only have the person in front of you and you are either 1,000 percent with them, it's good, there is no thought of cheating or "trading up" or "trading down" and you're happy together. That can happen more than once. Love is not a finite thing and once it's all parceled out it's gone for good.

 

But the bottom line is happy people don't cheat. Happy people also don't need to use some "new love" to distract them and jump from one relationship to another. Maybe it's time to spend some time alone with you and working out what you want first before getting involved with men who will inevitably disappoint you when you find out once again it's not about "Oh this person will make me happy and I can abdicate all responsibility and work for my own happiness, because they'll do it for me."

 

Just saying. Neither you or your boyfriend seem fully committed to each other so it's my sense that no, this isn't a "one" or "two" or anything else for that matter. It's time to just walk away and keep looking since each of you are involving other people.