In love with girl, she has a boyfriend. Need advice

[saluk]

People who have been hurt are likely to hurt others. Think about that as you consider going much further with this one. And how easy and how long she was OK with hurting someone she was "with".

 

Also, she has "decided" to break up. But it hasn't happened yet. It sounds like she is still stringing you along.

[boltnrun]

She found a new wallet to dig into.

 

Nice sob story she fed you. How about she, oh I don't know, GETS A JOB instead of finding guys to mooch off of?

 

She wants to move in together right away, I bet. Because she loooovvveesss you so much.

 

I hope you have a well-paying job to support the two of you. And can pay her internet and cell phone bill while she goes looking for a bigger paycheck to mooch off of.

[Vastaux]

Are the blinders completely on here? Dude you've effectively just ripped some girl right out of her boyfriends nose... You've destroyed a relationship.

 

I get that you have feelings for her but you never should of even met while she was still involved with this guy.

 

This whole thing is on her terms and whatever sob story she has sprung on you she sounds like she knows exactly what she was doing.

 

If she is ready to break up with him now after meeting you twice then why isn't she ready to formally call it a relationship? Sounds to me is was either a pile of BS about waiting until you met or she isn't ready to break it off with him at all and your gonna be strung along in till she decides she really does love him and she can't see you anymore.

[tobiasbeecher]

I feel a lot of people here are very harsh. I get it, since you only have a short story i told you here. There is obviously a lot more details. So it's easy to take these conclusions. And maybe they might be true to some extent. She will break up with him this week, but it's no simple call since she doesn't want to hurt him, or anyone for that sake. I get she cheated, but you have to realize something; The bf has been completely ignoring her for the last months, only playing on hes computer and barely talking to her outside daily chores etc. Only when he found out she started to get romantically attached to someone else over the Internet (me), did he seem to give a . I don't think you deserve someone if thats whats required to give your gf attention.

 

Also, she is no gold digger. She knows i am a student, and won't be able to support her financially. She also never asks for anything, and i had to convince her to let me pay for dinner at burger king last night.

[boltnrun]

Oh, so he ignored her and played video games, yes, that makes it OK to cheat! Of course cheating is the right answer, instead of, I don't know, TALKING to him or being honest and breaking up instead of waiting until she has another one lined up.

 

You're right, once she (eventually) gets around to actually breaking up with him things will be fine, And yeah, this is sarcasm.

 

I really hope you don't end up getting badly hurt when she pulls the same routine on you.

[Animelover6764]

You're confusing the harshness of the responses with reality man. There's no excuse for cheating. She already did hurt him by cheating regardless of his actions so don't justify her BS here. I don't take kindly to people like you but it's clear you have the blinders on; so here's this: Don't be surprised if she pulls that stunt on you.

 

 

Don't mean to be blunt but it is what it is.

[saluk]

"Only when he found out she started to get romantically attached to someone else over the Internet (me), did he seem to give a . I don't think you deserve someone if thats whats required to give your gf attention. "

 

When in a long term relationship, it is easy to take the fact that you are together for granted, and forget what effort is required to put in. Especially if the girlfriend's answer to not getting what she is needing from the relationship is to seek to meet those needs elsewhere rather than communicate and work through getting those needs met within the relationship - or making the decision to walk away. Nothing he has done means that he deserves to be cheated on.

 

Do you really want to get involved with someone whose answer to relationship problems is to seek out other lovers? If you do, feel free to continue to seek her out. Just know that you are very likely to to 1) be a source of pain for this guy, and 2) that you may not be so happy with what you wished for when you get it.

[tobiasbeecher]

Maybe i have the blinders on. But i just feel like taking a chance. She might have ended up in a situation where she is the bad one (so am i), but she does legitimately feel terrible for this. I was in skype with her late at night, listening to her crying over the whole thing, and being very upset. Not the kind of thing u can fake.

[fantom1399]

Just reading your original post really upsets me. Going into this situation, you knew she had a bf and you still proceeded to flirt and try to start a relationship with her. You my friend have no boundries. And i say this because i am on the recieving end of the exact same situation. These two where in a relationship and you may have broke up something that could have been special. You may think that this is what she wants but she likes the fantasy that should could have with you. When she snaps out of it and realizes that what you are doing is wrong, she will resent you. I do not feel sorry for you one bit and you deserve every last bit of what your feeling now. If I were you, I would stip talking to her IMMEDIATELY and find somebody single. Sorry to be blunt but hearing atories like this really pisses me off