faraday Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 So although you go out for dinner most nights, does Ty come too? Because if he is, it might be a legitimate "can't afford to treat you" issue. I'm glad the bugs are almost gone. That would suck so much. Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 23, 2015 Author Share Posted April 23, 2015 No, I usually only go out to dinner on weekends, and like maybe once or twice during the week. The other days I don't eat dinner. He doesn't come with me to eat every time; maybe once or twice a week, but normally just once. And we don't go to really expensive places. He also eats out with his mother a lot; I would guess twice a week at least. His mother doesn't cook much, so he never really learned to cook meals. So, I figured, here's a guy that understands my love of eating at restaurants (at least currently). I didn't hide how often I went from him; he is well aware. But I did tell him a little bit ago that I'll be eating home a lot more often, and could he please tell me some things he enjoys eating, and maybe he would be able to swing by occasionally for a home-cooked meal. He seemed excited about that. Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 23, 2015 Author Share Posted April 23, 2015 I am in so much pain. Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I am in so much pain. How. . come? From your procedure? Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 23, 2015 Author Share Posted April 23, 2015 Yes... There wasn't even a biopsy taken... But she rooted around so thoroughly in there, I'm really feeling it in my pelvis today.... Ouch Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 Yes... There wasn't even a biopsy taken... But she rooted around so thoroughly in there, I'm really feeling it in my pelvis today.... Ouch Sorry sweetie. . heating pad and ibuprofen Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 26, 2015 Author Share Posted April 26, 2015 Tried to set up a time to see Tyler, but he apparently is too busy with his mother and/or sleeping to see me since Wednesday. I'm starting to feel like I'm on the back burner. Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 Did you end up seeing him on the weekend? Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 I saw him last night. He had a terrible backache and basically begged me to come see him. It's so weird. I have a good time while I'm with him, and he really is a nice guy. But afterwards, I realize that I still question my relationship with him after every visit. I'm realizing more and more that he's pretty selfish, but in a nice way so that you don't really notice it til much later. He's nice to me, and comes to see me, and we go out to eat and mutually pay for our own meals, and he's good company, and we do a lot of things together that we both like; but really, past the first 2 or 3 weeks - what has he really done for me that makes me think, "you know, I genuinely like this guy and can see myself having a long term relationship with him?" - and the answer is, nothing. He treats me well, he asks for my advice on things, his mother likes me; but in reality, nothing about me or my life, or his or his life, benefits either of us to stay together. I'm coming slowly to the conclusion that this relationship is running its course. Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 And I think, if I had to say a reason for it, is because I'm just not passionate about him or our "life together". Link to comment
mhowe Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 A classic case of Mr. OK for Now. Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 A classic case of Mr. OK for Now. Yes, this makes sense. He'd be a pretty perfect candidate for someone else. Just not me. Link to comment
mhowe Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 BTDT. We dated for 9 months ---- and I realized that while it was "fine", it just wasn't good enough. So we broke up. He married the next woman he dated and by all accounts is happy and content. Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 It sucks when someone is great on paper...and you like them...but something is just...absent....and you can't quite put your finger on it. We've all been there you're learning about what you DO want in a partner though from this...so try to not get down about it. It just means the next guy will be even better. What's your plan? Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 I don't really know. I know it would be a good idea to end it if I know he's not what I'm looking for. I guess I just need to figure out a good time to do it. Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 Sorry I know you like him. I think...you're making the right decision. You should feel cherished and special...especially in the beginning. There's a better fit for you. Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 How long have you two been dating? Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 I don't really know. I know it would be a good idea to end it if I know he's not what I'm looking for. I guess I just need to figure out a good time to do it. Sorry to hear about this! Do it sooner rather than later. Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 How long have you two been dating? Over 2 months, "officially". We've been in contact for 3. Logically I know that that's really not much time together, at all. But... talking to him daily.... seeing him a few times a week for 3 months.... You do get to know the person in some capacity. And I guess what I've seen of him so far, I just know isn't for me. I'm bummed. Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 Over 2 months, "officially". We've been in contact for 3. Logically I know that that's really not much time together, at all. But... talking to him daily.... seeing him a few times a week for 3 months.... You do get to know the person in some capacity. And I guess what I've seen of him so far, I just know isn't for me. I'm bummed. It sucks this is the process of dating though...finding if someone fits with us...the first 6 months is...when a lot of break ups are bound to happen. Still sad. Better now though than holding out hoping it will be different in a few months or years, and then needing to end it Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 Well, I'll have had 2 LTRs.... and 2 that ended before 6 months..... So that means the next guy is a keeper! Right....?! Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 I hope so....but if he's not...that's okay....the right one is worth the wait Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 27, 2015 Author Share Posted April 27, 2015 I don't know when this one will end.... But I know it will.... The last 2 weeks or so, I've sort of thought that we've been distant... Maybe it'll just fizzle out by itself. (Hopeful thinking) Link to comment
faraday Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 I don't know when this one will end.... But I know it will.... The last 2 weeks or so, I've sort of thought that we've been distant... Maybe it'll just fizzle out by itself. (Hopeful thinking) It depends on how long you want to drag it out. I knew a guy that would wait for girls to break up with him...he would be less available, and kind of a jerk...and hope they would end things. No balls. And the women would always try to give him the benefit of the doubt and it would drag out for months. Personally, I would rather it to end on my terms, rather than hoping things just fade out...something to think about, anyway. Regardless of what you do, we'll be here to bounce things off of Link to comment
WithLove Posted April 28, 2015 Author Share Posted April 28, 2015 I had to go spend some time with my father for a bit today. I don't really like to because he's an alcoholic and it was a rough childhood for me. But I see him as often as I'm able. Anyway, I told Tyler I was going and he knows a little about my past with my father. He didn't text me once during my time there. Not to check in with me, nor to ask how I was after. It bothers me that despite knowing I was headed into a situation I deeply dislike, he didn't feel the need to see if I was okay. And I'm also admitting to myself that I'm looking for more reasons to dislike something Tyler does in order to make it easier on myself to break it off. Link to comment
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