Boss hugs more than parents

[Hoagy]

A strange thing happened today.

 

I posted last week about how I had been disappointed in a job application. In fact, I took the news rather badly because I’d entertained high hopes for that position and it still bothers me. Then last night I heard that an old school friend’s cancer has been diagnosed as terminal.

 

So this morning, when I arrived at the office where I volunteer, I was naturally feeling somewhat dejected. I had hardly got through the door before my boss recognized that something was wrong. In fact, she asked if I needed a hug. I have to admit that it has been a while since anyone gave me a hug.

 

But I was thinking; I can’t imagine my parents ever doing the same. I don’t want to give the impression that my parents are bad people because they’re not and it’s not that they don’t care. I think they just find it difficult to show they care. They feel uncomfortable about expressing affection, even to each other (God knows how they ever managed to procreate). Almost like hugs are something to be embarrassed about.

 

And it’s not just stereotypical British middle class reserve and stiff upper lip. And I’m not knocking the Stiff Upper Lip because it has its place. I know plenty of people who like to hug and show affection. Unfortunately my parents are not among them. But then, by all accounts, neither were their parents. As a family we just don’t do hugs (except me – I love to give and receive hugs when I can). Maybe this accounts for how amazingly f**ked up I really am.

 

So I get more affection from my boss than from my parents.

 

Is it too late to get adopted?

[annie24]

lol, too late to be adopted, but not too late to be a loving parent, when the time comes.

[Lala5001]

Your parents love you either way.

Try hugging them first,start it of yourself.

 

Some people are just like that with affection.

I'm a hugger and i've always founds there's a fair few people who seem to find them very awkward.

 

It's like when people remark 'are you a hugger' before they do,as many people just simply are uncomfortable with them.

[ParisPaulette]

Yeah, too late to get adopted. But never too late to surround yourself with people who hug you and show you a more open form of affection. Some people can do that and some can't. After my father died my mother started volunteering and surrounded herself with loving people who hugged her and showed her affection. She told me it was a way to get back some of the human touch that she'd lost when my father passed on. My mother has Alzheimer's now and lives with me, but one of the things that still brings her to life is a hug and I make sure she gets them from me, my family, and anyone else who cares to give them out.

 

I'm openly affectionate by nature. Some of the people I've had in my life are not, but it doesn't mean they didn't or don't love me, just that they have a different way of expressing it.

[JGintheOC]

My parents weren't affectionate when I was growing up. I can't ever rememebr them doing so. My dad was so hands off more than my mom.

 

I grew not naturally wanting to give affection but I was okay if i recieved affection but I guess it just never occurred to me to be affectionate. I feel like a robot sometimes LOL.

 

It happens. Don't blame your parents. They are who they are. It's like someone said, all you need to worry about is how loving YOU are.