Men over 30.

[SilverFactory]

If you have the career you want then that will make your life happier by default which will show confidence when approaching women.

 

Exactly!!

[calichick007]

I know other things aren't always equal. My point is that assuming they ARE, a guy who is stable will get the girl. I have NEVER suggested that financial status trumps all other qualities, or that you should tolerate bad behavior if a man is financially successful. Ever.

[agent1607307371]

I'm just looking to find a date. A simple answer like this could have worked: Maybe it's the vibe you are giving off. Be up lifting.

 

 

Dougie, you have had threads and threads and threads of that advice. People are just kind of done with it now and are looking at your situation rather than just the specific question.

[camus154]

There was nothing that had to do with my parents. I took it as : If you have the career you want then that will make your life happier by default which will show confidence when approaching women.

 

NO.

 

Not that I disagree with what Redwood Shores stated, but because isn't this what you're already doing? Isn't this why you're still subsidized by your parents? Because you're 31 and still pursuing your "dreams" rather than growing up and earning a living as an independent adult?

 

Forget about finding the magical career that will make you happy. Most people don't have that. Most people settle for a job that pays the bills. If you can find a job that does that AND that you love, great--but odds are that won't happen and at some point, as an adult, you need to suck it up and find something that's viable.

[calichick007]

Yes, if you get on my bad side..I will definitely be hard to please. When people give me some run around answer then I will be disappointed and annoyed. If I had never told people here about my financial status then they would have never known. They would just assume.

 

I'm just looking to find a date. A simple answer like this could have worked: Maybe it's the vibe you are giving off. Be up lifting.

 

But NO... My first answers were more like this : Get a job. Don't rely on your parents. Have some stability in your life, etc...

 

Maybe next time you should just tell people what answers to give you in the first post.

[happpybear]

try link removed.

 

Also, every guy i know who played in a band (not matter what they looked like) had chicks THROWING themselves at them...just sayin'

[happpybear]

NO.

 

Not that I disagree with what Redwood Shores stated, but because isn't this what you're already doing? Isn't this why you're still subsidized by your parents? Because you're 31 and still pursuing your "dreams" rather than growing up and earning a living as an independent adult?

 

Forget about finding the magical career that will make you happy. Most people don't have that. Most people settle for a job that pays the bills. If you can find a job that does that AND that you love, great--but odds are that won't happen and at some point, as an adult, you need to suck it up and find something that's viable.

 

this is a good point and very true, i learned the hard way that my dream job will likely never happen for me...so i got a different job and volunteer at my dream job...sad but that is life. Take what you can get..this is a really bad economy with no end in site, you can't be picky

[Dougie_D]

this is a good point and very true, i learned the hard way that my dream job will likely never happen for me...so i got a different job and volunteer at my dream job...sad but that is life. Take what you can get..this is a really bad economy with no end in site, you can't be picky

 

What if your parents gave you the same income as your job so you would have more time to volunteer at your dream job? Would you take it?

[HeatherB]

The point is to have a direction in life. Give a woman a reason to support your life's mission, emotionally not financially. But first you have to have a real mission. Whether your job is the same as your mission is secondary. As long as you know there's a point to your being here and you are doing something about it, you're a zillion more times attractive than some drifter billionaire. But...you have to mean it. And video games cannot be involved.

[RachaelRosen]

I would never date a guy who doesn't have a job and relies on his parents income. I am almost 30. Sure, when I was 18 I would have, but not now. You want girls who don't care and haven't learned yet? Go hit up 19 year olds. Truth hurts.

[camus154]

Have you considered asking your parents to hook you up with a nice young gal? Maybe they could do that for you?

[lalalollipops]

^ lol... He hasn't sunk that low has he?

How embarrassing would that be?

[Fudgie]

What if your parents gave you the same income as your job so you would have more time to volunteer at your dream job? Would you take it?

 

No, because parents are not endless ATM machines. I know it wouldn't be good for me to get used to getting that income and not having to work for it. I would feel guilty.

 

I am currently working towards my dream job but in the meantime I make $13/hour wiping butts and dealing with crazy people. And you know what, it's great. I love getting experience in my field while I make $400/week. My parents have offered to give me money but I said no.

 

You don't understand yet how good it feels to be independent and working towards something. You seem keen to keep receiving your parents money and this disturbs me. It's not about money. It's about attitude and ambition.

 

Look, I had my parents help me while I was in college full time. When I am in grad school I'm sure they will help me again. That's normal. But expecting your parents to fund you as you work for free when you're 30+ when you've been trying for years is just too much.

[Dougie_D]

I worked 3 years part-time and then 1 full year Full-time at Sam's Club. My parents only helped with gas money and the first years with my car payment. But then after 2 years my dad decided to pay the whole thing off and said "Merry Christmas".

 

I didn't feel good at all. I wasn't working towards anything. My parents guilt tripped me into going full time. My dad kept on "pushing me" The only thing it got me was an extra 1.25 and 40 hours. I was working about 35-36 hours when I was half-time.

 

Once I find my job that makes 20k I won't have to touch my parent money people!

[agent1607307371]

Dougie, what if the dream job is just that? What if you never manage to make it? Do you have any back up plans or do you intend to be 50 and still chasing "it"?

[Dougie_D]

I would create my dream job. My dream job is an A&R for a label. The next step would be to OWN my label. My parent have talked about funding the project, but I am not sure if I want to take their money for it.

 

My parents are "too giving". They put extra cash for a month when I told them I had trouble looking for a place. I told them they didn't have too, but they did. I've never once asked for money.

 

It's my choice to use it or not. That's for sure. I just look at it like an unemployed check.

[blueidealist24]

This has changed from a thread to help Dougie find a date, to debating whether Dougie should stop using his parents' money. I'm not convinced that the two really have much to do with each other.

[lalalollipops]

Yeah of course they will offer you money, but you could say no right? I mean when my parents offer me money these days I feel really embarrassed and refuse to take it.

[Dougie_D]

Because posters love to bring attention to it. It's the one thing they really like to nag me for.

 

If my parents have never wanted me to get plastic surgery, make me go to a Learning Center (while the LC asked me why I was even there), when asking for women advice my dad goes "hahaha! have you not looked in the mirror lately!", or when my dad says "so what do you guys think about my loser son who's a cart guy and 24 years old?", or when my dad thinks I'm gay because I don't have luck with women.

 

How would that make you feel? Oh, and when I ask politely "no" they go and ramble and say "WHat?! How the ef! can you live on your own without us then!"

 

I seriously think my parents don't think I can live (the way they want me to) without their support. I could live in a real crappy apt. Have a real crappy car. But my parents don't think I should live that way, so they'll give extra income to allow me to not seem so "poor" as my parents would say.

[lalalollipops]

Lol keep telling yourself that. -_-.... Good luck.

[Capricorn3]

This has changed from a thread to help Dougie find a date, to debating whether Dougie should stop using his parents' money. I'm not convinced that the two really have much to do with each other.

I agree.

 

Can we please stick to the original topic/questions asked.

 

Thanks.

[blueidealist24]

Just curious, why/when did they want you to go to a Learning Center?

[Dougie_D]

I already got my answer. I just need to act happier. Not get depressed about my job situation. Just be happy that I'm working towards the goal. I think I need to approach women as if I am the coolest guy in town. I just need to focus more on my career and not get depressed when I get rejected from women.

[blueidealist24]

I already got my answer. I just need to act happier. Not get depressed about my job situation. Just be happy that I'm working towards the goal. I think I need to approach women as if I am the coolest guy in town. I just need to focus more on my career and not get depressed when I get rejected from women.

 

I think that's the bottom line.

[Dougie_D]

I went to the Learning Center when I was a junior in highschool. 17 years old. I was the oldest person there. The next oldest was 14? I don't know why they wanted me to go. It has ALWAYS made me feel as if my parents think I'm an idiot.