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How can people have sex with the same person and not get bored?


joeson1257

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I am still a virgin so I have no knowledge of such things, but it seems to me that If I had sex with the same girl all the time then things would get very boring, kind of like watching the same movie over and over and over again. Assuming that neither of them is cheating, how do couples not get bored of having sex with the same person?

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seems weird huh? i thought the same thing before i ever had sex. well it actually gets way better. even years into the relationship. when you really love someone it just takes the sex to a whole new level. it's not really explainable until you're in that situation. but it beats the hell out of casual sex, it really really does.

 

a lot of it does have to do with the fact that a.) you love them and adore sharing yourself with them (well that's how I felt.) and b.) you know each other so well that you're free to experiment with your partner and not be embarrased about anything (unless it's something really kinky...)

 

their really is nothing like looking into the eyes of your sweetie and knowing that they love you in that moment. lot's to look forward to!

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I agree with what everyone else here as said.

When you love someone and they are your committed partner in life, sex doesn't get boring (especially if you vary it, try new things, etc).

For me, it is more than an orgasm, it's reinforcing the intimacy/connection between us. Sex is something we share with only each other and it just cements our loving bond and partnership.

And we know each other so well, it always physically feels amazing! And afterwards, when you are lying beside each other, relaxed and content and having just shared yourselves with each other, it just makes you smile. Every time.

 

That being said, I am sure there are those that do get bored. But there are plenty who can be with the same person for year after year and still enjoy it immensely.

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as the love develops between a couple the sex goes to a new level .. the feeling of having sex with the person your

totally in love with is so intense , so different it far outweighs sex with someone casual .

 

that said ...a couple in love still need to make an effort and not become to complacent .

 

i'm a virgin but this. btw shooting star, lovely new picture! very pretty

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also you do have phases of it being a bit, meh. but usually it's just a phase. it happens every now and then but as long as both people are committed to keeping it interesting and try new things than things can only get better.

 

some peoples sex lives do die for numerous reasons but that too can be re-ignited. it's just one of those things that you really have to invest your time and energy in.

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It will only be boring if you're not good lovers. If someone keeps things hot and interesting, and I have a good connection with them outside of the bedroom as well, there is no way I could get bored!

 

If you weren't a virgin and if I thought you were over the age of 19, I'd smack you for asking this question. But since you're inexperienced, I'll just say you'll learn how amazing sex with the right person can be. Once you have it, you'll know what I mean.

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Cos it isn't just about the actions but the emotions involved. I hope you don't turn out to be a cheater. o_O

 

This was my thought too. I really hope this question is truly out of curiosity and not because of a poor attitude towards women and relationships.

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For sure people do see having sex with the same partner to being as boring as eating the same breakfast cereal everyday.

 

The problems arise when someone starts thinking, sex and sexual desires 'could' be more fulfilling with someone else with disregard to the love within the non sexual areas of a relationship when they are in a relationship.

This kind of person should not be in a relationship with anyone and would be better suited possibly going online and making a profile stating they want sexual encounters or become a member of an online community which supports it.

Then they may also come accross someone who is willing to have an open relationship as well, so both of you can have sex with different partners and not care about it.

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It gets boring when one person stops putting in the effort. Ever have sex with a sack of potatoes? When sex with the partner starts to resemble sex with a sack of potatoes, it gets boring really fast, to the point of lost erections.

 

That was the mid relationship speedbump; when we broke up we were actually on a hot streak ,where sex was GREAT again...sigh...

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Because sex is about love, not entertainment.

 

LOL, it's not about love. It's about pleasure. And sometimes procreation.

 

Either of you trying to declare what sex is about is missing the point since it has different significance from person to person, although I do disagree with the general sentiment here that love will automatically conquer over a rudimentary sex life. It certainly can get routine despite love. Sometimes you'd rather just jerk off and sometimes you're just not that turned on. This is normal and doesn't necessarily indicate there is something wrong. However having sex with someone else is terrible solution for reasons I think go without saying. It's important to be open and accountable so you can stay on the same page as much as possible, and to have respect that sometimes you're not always in the mood for the same thing at the same time.

 

Also it is nothing like repeatedly watching the same movie. There is no ancient instinctual drive directing us to watch movies, for instance.

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LOL, it's not about love. It's about pleasure. And sometimes procreation.

 

It is about both (love and pleasure) for me and my boyfriend. He tells me that when we have sex, he feels a lot of pleasure but also emotion for me. It's a way of helping to bond with someone, sexual activity in general. When I went through a really bad patch and we didn't have sex for almost 2 weeks, he worried a lot about our relationship and snuggled with me more but didn't initiate anything.

 

It may just be for pleasure for you but for others, it's more. I could never have sex with someone that I didn't love.

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Sex is all things really. Entertainment, alleviation from boredom (yay!), an expression of love, getting off, a hobby. I think we could make a pretty good list! And it can be more than one thing at once. For some people (i.e. myself) it's our way of expressing affection and love.

 

I agree with Fudgie though. Now that I'm broken up with my ex, the thought of sex without love being apart of that just makes me feel unenthusiastic. When it's with someone you love it's taken to a whole new level and becomes something else. Sometimes you don't realize that until it's gone sigh....

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We're not missing the point - we're answering based on our values because, like you pointed out, there is no one right answer. As your answer is not right for me. Sex takes on whatever significance you assign to it, which we all do differently according to our values and what makes us happy. If you're getting bored having sex with the same person, you're probably not cut out for monogamy for whatever reason and shouldn't even bother ever trying to just have sex with the same person over and over. But you should understand what you're giving up to live that lifestyle as well.

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