annie24 Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 it is a good skill. plus, a hairdresser can get a job anywhere. she can move to Afghanistan and get a job there. women may be wearing veils over their heads, but they still need haircuts! on the other hand, the PhD marine biologist might be limited to a few locations in the world where she can work. I think it does make things easier when one partner has a job where they can move easily with it. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 The point is that someone on here said that before I consider dating/wanting to date an established man with a handsome salary, I should consider my financial situation first and perhaps choose a partner in my financial boat. But then when I wrote about my hair dresser with a lawyer, why didn't anybody say, she should have considered her financial situation and choose someone of her own level.....That's what upset me on here. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 The point is that someone on here said that before I consider dating/wanting to date an established man with a handsome salary, I should consider my financial situation first and perhaps choose a partner in my financial boat. But then when I wrote about my hair dresser with a lawyer, why didn't anybody say, she should have considered her financial situation and choose someone of her own level.....That's what upset me on here. That really wasn't the point the was being made. Put simply it meant that perhaps you shouldn't have such high standards regarding your would-be partners salary when you yourself aren't there yet. Thats double standards isn't it. If you have certain expectations then you can't judge the guys you go for in having the same standards can you? The reason no one has said anything about the hairdresser considering her own financial situation and choosing someone ... er ... on her own level (on her own level??? really???) is because no-one has a problem with it. I mean what is it to us or to you what somebody else does or wants? But that aside your posts are full of bitterness and contradictions. You judge people by their appearances, their weight and their salaries. You seem to think that people marry for money and not for love. Quite evidently you think you are a better person than the woman your ex is going on a date with. How do you know? You don't know her. Have you made that assumption merely on her weight and appearance? You think she is punching above her weight because she you put her as a 5 on your attractiveness scale, yourself an 8-10 and your bf a 10!!! I mean c'mon do you really do that .... judge people's worth by how attractive you think they are? Maybe what you don't see as attractive someone else does. That is your opinion, maybe it isn't your bf's. WhenWillILove, for someone who is highly educated you are very emotionally stunted and you are very narrow minded. Maybe you would fair better if you came down off your pedestal and realised that, really, you are no worse or better than anyone else. Maybe if you stopped judging people harshly, you could be out there right now enjoying yourself, giving yourself the chance to meet new people, eventually find a new love interest, instead of looking down on everyone for not earning enough and snooping on your ex-bf!! Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 That really wasn't the point the was being made. Put simply it meant that perhaps you shouldn't have such high standards regarding your would-be partners salary when you yourself aren't there yet. Thats double standards isn't it. If you have certain expectations then you can't judge the guys you go for in having the same standards can you? Right...and why didn't my hair dresser marry someone of her own socioeconomic standing? It's evident when she dated him, she had high standards too. Actually, I do think I deserve a man with good financial standing because I will have that good financial standing, too. And I'm a bomb shell so.....Just sayin'! Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 link removed Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 Right...and why didn't my hair dresser marry someone of her own socioeconomic standing? It's evident when she dated him, she had high standards too. Actually, I do think I deserve a man with good financial standing because I will have that good financial standing, too. And I'm a bomb shell so.....Just sayin'! I really, really, really don't understand why it is such a problem if a hairdresser didn't marry someone of her own socioeconomic standing? Why does it even have to be an issue? So she married someone who earns more than her ... but that doesn't mean to say she married him specifically because of that. Maybe love came into it, you know? Pure and simple love. Maybe they just fell in love ... have you thought of that? Has that even crossed your mind. Link to comment
Flyingpiglet Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 link removed Don't believe everything you read in the tabloids! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I really, really, really don't understand why it is such a problem if a hairdresser didn't marry someone of her own socioeconomic standing? Why does it even have to be an issue? So she married someone who earns more than her ... but that doesn't mean to say she married him specifically because of that. Maybe love came into it, you know? Pure and simple love. Maybe they just fell in love ... have you thought of that? Has that even crossed your mind. I agree. Love is a BIG part of modern marriage. My husband and I married as University students and nether one had money. We had love though. Link to comment
Huntress0527 Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I really, really, really don't understand why it is such a problem if a hairdresser didn't marry someone of her own socioeconomic standing? Why does it even have to be an issue? So she married someone who earns more than her ... but that doesn't mean to say she married him specifically because of that. Maybe love came into it, you know? Pure and simple love. Maybe they just fell in love ... have you thought of that? Has that even crossed your mind. I agree and really none of us have a right to judge anyone. You don't know what goes in their relationship, you only see what's on the outside. I think you're going to have a hard time finding a guy the checks off all your superficial boxes. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 "Sometimes, I get a bit jealous of those girls that are extremely attractive yet are like hairdressers. They hold themselves like queens and date very successful men. Not all of them but I've seen plentiful bomb shells dating lawyers, doctors, etc. " I am in awe of my hairstylists and their skills/talents/how many of them have transformed my day from eh to ahhhhh. I don't think lawyers have to marry lawyers or however you put it. People have different needs in a romantic relationship and of course you don't know if the hairdresser is in law school part time and who cares if she's not. I'm also not saying that a hairdresser fulfills a different need than a lawyer- just saying that your black/white thinking about socieconomic background and status doesn't translate well to relationships and comes accross as a bit elitist. I did look for men who admired and respected my decision to spend years working on an intense and successful career and for men who were financially stable like me and had similar levels of education, etc. I thought that gave us more in common and in my personal situation it did. But I'm sure that's not true for everyone. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I did look for men who admired and respected my decision to spend years working on an intense and successful career and for men who were financially stable like me and had similar levels of education, etc. I thought that gave us more in common and in my personal situation it did. But I'm sure that's not true for everyone. Quite right. To flip this around I do think our own day-to-day lives ... how we live it, who we are living it with (ie. work and work colleagues) do dictate to an extent who we can become attracted to and who we are more compatible with as we are undoubtedly mixing with likewise people and I think we are naturally going to be more attracted to people who we have a common ground with ... but that doesn't mean to say we are setting it as a standard as such and it doesn't mean to say that we can't one day meet someone whilst in a completely different environment and be blown away by them despite the fact that they may have a totally different socioeconomic standing ... and even if we are setting ourselves standards, that's fine too, but that does not give us the right to judge others who may well be from a different socioeconomic standard than ourselves as WhenWillILove seems to do and I certainly don't think we have the right to assume that the hairdresser is with her lawyer husband merely for his money and that he is marrying beneath him. . Link to comment
FathomFear Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I agree. Love is a BIG part of modern marriage. My husband and I married as University students and nether one had money. We had love though. I agree. Right now it seems like the OP sees the world through salaries, waist lines, and physical beauty. Let's hope that love, common interests, and compatible personalities don't get lost in the mix. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 I agree. Right now it seems like the OP sees the world through salaries, waist lines, and physical beauty. Let's hope that love, common interests, and compatible personalities don't get lost in the mix. Really, that is all people have. Money, well that can be lost and it does not warm the heart. Waist lines those change with time and age and babies. Physical beauty well one is not the same at 70 that they were at 20 so don't count on that either. Compatible personalities and love, those two things can stand forever and stand alone over time. Link to comment
bulletproof Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 The point is that someone on here said that before I consider dating/wanting to date an established man with a handsome salary, I should consider my financial situation first and perhaps choose a partner in my financial boat. But then when I wrote about my hair dresser with a lawyer, why didn't anybody say, she should have considered her financial situation and choose someone of her own level.....That's what upset me on here. Because your hairdresser is not posting on here saying that she would *only* consider someone who makes x amount of money. Perhaps the hairdresser was open to any man as long as she loved him, and he just happens to be a lawyer. You, on the other hand, have certain expectations. Which is fine for yourself, but don't expect that others will share them. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 Because your hairdresser is not posting on here saying that she would *only* consider someone who makes x amount of money. Perhaps the hairdresser was open to any man as long as she loved him, and he just happens to be a lawyer. You, on the other hand, have certain expectations. Which is fine for yourself, but don't expect that others will share them. and because there is no reason why she should have to "choose someone of her own level" just because some people get jealous and don't like the idea that she is batting out of her league and taking what they presume should be their level of man! Level?? Honestly!! Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 Thanks for the assumptions. No, I would not marry just for money. Attraction would be the first. Yeah, surprise, surprise. Plenty of successful men out there but with beer bellies that I ain't attracted to! And as far as my hair dresser is concerned, love is first for her but so is a successful man. In her own words. Thread closed. Link to comment
bulletproof Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Thanks for the assumptions. No, I would not marry just for money. Attraction would be the first. Yeah, surprise, surprise. Plenty of successful men out there but with beer bellies that I ain't attracted to! And as far as my hair dresser is concerned, love is first for her but so is a successful man. In her own words. Thread closed. I think you need a moderator to close a thread. I don't think anyone here assumed anything. You put all the information right out here for us to see. How is that assuming? Plus, the title of the thread is asking for "thoughts?" That's exactly what people gave you. Link to comment
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