annie24 Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 in this economy, there are many people financially struggling who had good jobs and whatnot just 5 years ago. it's not easy times. Link to comment
camus154 Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I honestly have no idea what this thread is supposed to be about. Not being able to find quality men? Finding quality men who aren't into you because you're either not a hairdresser or finished with school? Mad about the ex who wanted to marry you, but didn't because your career came first, but now you're jealous of the woman he's with? Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I know my ex- he will not for the life of him date a woman who is above a size 6. His preference. But that is what he is doing. I guess he wouldn't normally date a 5 (your rating for her attractiveness) and would normally date an 8-10 (your ratings for yourself) but, again, that is what he is doing, well in your opinion. Perhaps he has realised that it isn't cool to be quite so shallow or superficial. Honestly what is with the ratings? You can't go through life judging and rating people and comparing yourself to them. It won't get you anywhere. The point is he is your ex and he was bound to date someone sooner or later. All the rest doesn't matter. Link to comment
FathomFear Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 It's just that someone on here said that it's unreasonable for ME to prefer to want to date professional men with great careers. Hence, I brought in the hair dresser/lawyer thing. No, I said that it's less reasonable to have that expectation when you aren't in the same boat yet. I suspect it will be much easier to attract a guy with a great career when you yourself also have one. Having said that, is there a particular reason why you aren't considering your peers? Surely in med school there are lots of like-minded individuals who share your interests, etc, and who will also have solid careers just as you hopefully will. If you expect a potential partner to be patient for you as you build a career, why can't you do the same? Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I honestly don't think I'm an Adriana Lima or Megan Fox...though with that Botox, she ain't lookin' too good lately. But maybe I'm close...marginally close? Whatever. That's another thing that bugs me. Where my ex lives, there's plenty of hot women with careers. Where I moved, the men first off I do not find physically appealing. Yeah, seen some cute ones but still not into them. Second of all, most of them are not well off, or even off. I've been approached numerous times but the men for the most part were financially struggling men. Oh, I'm not getting this at all. Perhaps you should stop judging people by their financial background. Like annie said, you can't afford to in today's economic climate. Link to comment
Huntress0527 Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Sorry but love does not work on finances alone. It makes no difference how much anybody makes - if that person does not love you, then they never will. Why are you all about the money and the career? Are you afraid of how other people see you, so you need a man with money? This is spot on. Doesn't matter how good looking someone is their personality can make them ugly pretty quickly. Also, this economy downright stinks and a job is never completely safe-proof. So a good job today can be gone tomorrow. Pretty sad that people base on what they are looking for on superficial reasons. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 But that is what he is doing. I guess he wouldn't normally date a 5 (your rating for her attractiveness) and would normally date an 8-10 (your ratings for yourself) but, again, that is what he is doing, well in your opinion. Perhaps he has realised that it isn't cool to be quite so shallow or superficial. Honestly what is with the ratings? You can't go through life judging and rating people and comparing yourself to them. It won't get you anywhere. The point is he is your ex and he was bound to date someone sooner or later. All the rest doesn't matter. Again, the thread got long and winded and there are misconceptions all over. No, he is NOT dating a size 8 girl. He is going on a date with a girl that's size 4. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 Oh, I'm not getting this at all. Perhaps you should stop judging people by their financial background. Like annie said, you can't afford to in today's economic climate. Really? Then how do you explain my hairdresser who earns like 18k (if!) and married to a lawyer owning his own law firm. Newly married to. What the hell was she thinking? Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Again, the thread got long and winded and there are misconceptions all over. No, he is NOT dating a size 8 girl. He is going on a date with a girl that's size 4. So what is the problem then? I thought you had an issue with the fact that she was overweight. Oh dear, this is all beyond me. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 No, I said that it's less reasonable to have that expectation when you aren't in the same boat yet. I suspect it will be much easier to attract a guy with a great career when you yourself also have one. Having said that, is there a particular reason why you aren't considering your peers? Surely in med school there are lots of like-minded individuals who share your interests, etc, and who will also have solid careers just as you hopefully will. If you expect a potential partner to be patient for you as you build a career, why can't you do the same? Because I prefer men who are already financially stable in life. That's MY preference. I also prefer older men. Again, MY preference. Lastly, if I was a man and there was this gorgeous girl with an hour glass body that was also in med school.....I wouldn't say, "Well, gee, I like her but she's not financially secure now. So no to her." Oh and on another point, for all you ENaers that say money isn't everything, apparently, according to you, I should consider my financial and career situation and since I'm only a med student, I should aim for what's in my league. Right? But hey, let the hair dresser get married to the lawyer and let the dental assistant get married to the dentist! Totally cool with that! They love each other and that's what's most important. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 So what is the problem then? I thought you had an issue with the fact that she was overweight. Oh dear, this is all beyond me. I never said she was overweight. I have no darn idea where this came from. I probably gave a random arse example and it escalated into this. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Really? Then how do you explain my hairdresser who earns like 18k (if!) and married to a lawyer owning his own law firm. Newly married to. What the hell was she thinking? What the hell was who thinking? The hairdresser? Is the hairdresser/lawyer relationship for real. I thought it was an example. Nevermind, I guess it doesn't matter. Erm, well if its real then I'm guessing she thought "I love this guy, I want to marry him!". Link to comment
Furbys Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 So basically you want to be with a guy who is earning more and is not under your level of education, and because of this he will be 5-10 years older. If that is your preference then fine but you will probably struggle quite a bit especially in this economic climate. How about focusing on getting your career instead of what type of guy you would like and trying to find this mysterious guy? Also you made a point earlier that men who have educated etc partners end up going for some younger woman, well that suggests that would happen to you, because you (if you complete your course) will be educated. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Really? Then how do you explain my hairdresser who earns like 18k (if!) and married to a lawyer owning his own law firm. Newly married to. What the hell was she thinking? Maybe the lawyer is not an elitist. Most people are not elitist, even well off people. Those who are, well, they belong with other elitists. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 So basically you want to be with a guy who is earning more and is not under your level of education, and because of this he will be 5-10 years older. If that is your preference then fine but you will probably struggle quite a bit especially in this economic climate. How about focusing on getting your career instead of what type of guy you would like and trying to find this mysterious guy? Also you made a point earlier that men who have educated etc partners end up going for some younger woman, well that suggests that would happen to you, because you (if you complete your course) will be educated. How about this.... You can focus on your career/schooling and be in a relationship or even marriage. Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 I never said she was overweight. I have no darn idea where this came from. I probably gave a random arse example and it escalated into this. Because you said this ...... Yeah but it's like this.....Case in point. The girl's overweight and though she does have a good degree and a good career, she's aiming for the Brad Pitt that's also a professional. She's a 5 in looks and he's a 10. And she's huntin' him down.... While here is the other girl who is between an 8-10, great super model body, educated, still in school except without the cash...and she thinks she doesn't deserve a guy like that! What's wrong with this picture??? I took it you were referring to yourself and this girl that your ex is going on a date with. Afterall that is what this thread was about. If it isn't then I'm sorry for the confusion but, honestly, if it isn't real then perhaps you should keep it real. Random examples that aren't even real have no significance! Link to comment
Furbys Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 How about this.... You can focus on your career/schooling and be in a relationship or even marriage. Of course, but you seem very focused on finding a guy who has these specific requirements. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 It is possible but first you have to find a man willing to support you during that time. Also too if you consider money to be the utmost when it comes to someone's worth in the world that might be difficult, because the man you find might look down on you because he has to support you through your education. Also too if you are only looking for support to get you through school and then you get to look down on HIM because you make more don't expect a lot of people to sign up for that. Link to comment
WhenWillILove Posted January 17, 2012 Author Share Posted January 17, 2012 It is possible but first you have to find a man willing to support you during that time. Also too if you consider money to be the utmost when it comes to someone's worth in the world that might be difficult, because the man you find might look down on you because he has to support you through your education. Also too if you are only looking for support to get you through school and then you get to look down on HIM because you make more don't expect a lot of people to sign up for that. First of all, I'm not looking for a man to support me financially. I'm not looking for him to pay my rent, or food, and especially school. All I want is wining, dining, and lots of fun of course. The rest my parents can take care of. Link to comment
camus154 Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 First of all, I'm not looking for a man to support me financially. I'm not looking for him to pay my rent, or food, and especially school. All I want is wining, dining, and lots of fun of course. The rest my parents can take care of. I think you're having a go at us. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 First of all, I'm not looking for a man to support me financially. I'm not looking for him to pay my rent, or food, and especially school. All I want is wining, dining, and lots of fun of course. The rest my parents can take care of. Why don't you look after it? You want to be an independent woman after all, right? Link to comment
Tanzi Posted January 17, 2012 Share Posted January 17, 2012 Really? Then how do you explain my hairdresser who earns like 18k (if!) and married to a lawyer owning his own law firm. Newly married to. What the hell was she thinking? WhenWillILove, I would really like to know what point you were trying to make here. Just curious. What do you think she was thinking. Link to comment
annie24 Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 Because I prefer men who are already financially stable in life. That's MY preference. I also prefer older men. Again, MY preference. Lastly, if I was a man and there was this gorgeous girl with an hour glass body that was also in med school.....I wouldn't say, "Well, gee, I like her but she's not financially secure now. So no to her." Oh and on another point, for all you ENaers that say money isn't everything, apparently, according to you, I should consider my financial and career situation and since I'm only a med student, I should aim for what's in my league. Right? But hey, let the hair dresser get married to the lawyer and let the dental assistant get married to the dentist! Totally cool with that! They love each other and that's what's most important. I don't understand where all this bitterness is coming from or what is the point of your rant (sorry). Has some guy told you he doesn't want to date you because you're not established in your career? What's the deal? Why so upset? So what if some random lawyer wants to marry some random hairstylist - what's it to you? What if a marine biologist wants to marry an auto mechanic. So what? How does that affect your life? Link to comment
lilypadgirl Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 Lastly, if I was a man and there was this gorgeous girl with an hour glass body that was also in med school.....I wouldn't say, "Well, gee, I like her but she's not financially secure now. So no to her." Has any guy said things like that to you? Or is this what you believe he thinks because of the values you're assuming onto him? It seems like he asked you to marry him and you were the one who turned him down? Did he ask you to leave med school for him? What is the context here? Without more information, it's really hard to understand your points, which are jumping all over the place. Finally, if YOU measure your self worth only as a "gorgeous girl with an hour glass body that was also in med school" and a list of superficial qualities rather than internal qualities like a kind, funny girl with a good heart and attitude, then you're either going to attract guys that only judge you based on superficial qualities, which include money so it's no surprise that they leave you when you're poor or you're not going to have any more to offer guys that look for internal qualities and guys will see right through the superficiality and leave. Link to comment
bulletproof Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 Really? Then how do you explain my hairdresser who earns like 18k (if!) and married to a lawyer owning his own law firm. Newly married to. What the hell was she thinking? I totally don't understand this. What do you mean, what was she thinking? Is she not allowed to marry a lawyer? Chances are they really just enjoy each other. What's wrong with being a hairdresser, anyway? It's a skill. I couldn't cut hair to save my life, so I'm glad some people are good at it. Link to comment
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