Seraphim Posted December 23, 2018 Author Share Posted December 23, 2018 Heading through the big T.O. on our way to family homes. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 My Christmas spirit is so so meh this year. I saw my dad on the 23rd. He tried to tell me he took my cousin and her husband to $1000 concert last year for Christmas. 🤣😂 Yeah, riiiiiiiight. My cousin has agoraphobia so bad she only leaves her house once a year if that and that is only to see her mother . Her husband has had dementia for 4 years and no longer knows who he is. Other than he was ok. My stress is horrendous because everything is a discombobulated dingle shyte which upsets me. My hubby has a cold and I have the beginnings of a sinus infection. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 25, 2018 Author Share Posted December 25, 2018 I put my foot down with my mom. Little M went to his mom’s so see could see him open gifts and so he went last night . Then they text to ask if he could stay until past supper at 6. I said then he won’t be able to open gifts with us. That was not the deal mom. If you want me to adopt someone you better start considering what we want too not just kissing Papa’s family’s azz. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 27, 2018 Author Share Posted December 27, 2018 This past holiday was about on par with my holidays as a kid . SHYTTY. I want to stay home next year. I am sick and my PTSD is sooooooooo bad. I am having violent violent nightmares . Like really disgusting about my husband and his parents. It involves them being cannibalistic zombies who were trying to kill and eat me . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 27, 2018 Author Share Posted December 27, 2018 R&R are seeing the new Transformer movie. I stayed home and slept almost all day. Too much stress and illness and hoopla for me. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 28, 2018 Author Share Posted December 28, 2018 I am so irritated with my husband right now. It has been brewing since yesterday. After this: Well..... that went as stupid as you know what. My SIL took 2.5 hours to shower and come over from one min away. After we already waited about 1.5 hours to come over. Now my FIL with severe dementia doesn’t know what the hell is going on and yelling and changing his mind every 3 mins about he does or doesn’t want to go out. Finally my husband says, we’re out and we pack up and leave, AFTER HE TELLS HIS FAMILY WE ARE LEAVING BECAUSE I AM SICK ( I was not so sick we needed to leave. His mom is in tears and his sister is smiling like the cat who caught the canary. My husband called his mom from the car and said next we would take them for lunch when his dad is still reasonable because by evening he is a mess. And his sister could join or not. I was mad because he made me the excuse. He did know I was going to go donky Kong if his sister pulled stupid crap which she did so he packed us up and got us out. She was 2.5 hours late which agitated her mom to keep calling her . Then his dad was yelling at his mom to leave his “ princess “ alone and then his dad who has severe dementia is pissy for the rest of the evening. Now for visiting we are taking over control and his sister can miss out or stop being an idiot. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 28, 2018 Author Share Posted December 28, 2018 Sick as heck. Need the walk in. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 28, 2018 Author Share Posted December 28, 2018 Been waiting at the walk in since 2 PM. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 29, 2018 Author Share Posted December 29, 2018 In bed with fireplace on and meds taken. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 30, 2018 Author Share Posted December 30, 2018 No power, AGAIN!! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 30, 2018 Author Share Posted December 30, 2018 Power is back thankfully! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 30, 2018 Author Share Posted December 30, 2018 Starting to feel MUCH better. Everything is draining and I am now sleeping all night . My best friend is at the hospital with her daughter, her daughter probably has strep throat . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted December 31, 2018 Author Share Posted December 31, 2018 Something I didn’t mention because I have been sick. Once again my family was a clown car over Christmas. WHY WHY Every single holiday my dad has to mock christianity. A church was going around to every single apartment in my dad’s building to hand out gifts and food. My dad lives in poverty in city housing. The people handed me a gift for him. I thanked them and brought it to him. He wanted to give it back and I said why don’t we just see what is inside . The food he said , hey I eat that. It was all I could do to not roll my eyes and say uh huh hypocrite. Then my mom and my brother sit there Christmas Day to discuss how the Church is evil. I leave the discussion and walk away. And they both say, oh yeah you’re a Catholic. Sorry. And carry on. 🤡🤡 So when they come to my house I need to carry on about heathens? 🤡🤡🤡🤡🙄 Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 1, 2019 Author Share Posted January 1, 2019 Icing my knee because it is so so bad. I need to be cleaning to open a daycare tomorrow but my knee is so bad I could die. I talked to our priest and he said as long as when my parents get full custody of little M and have documentation to prove it then we can have him baptized . Then my son can be his godfather and my girlfriend can be his godmother . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 Making a blanket and sweater for my soon to be son. 🥰 He is just so dang cute. He doesn’t look anything like us though we are also dark-haired and he’s blonde . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 6, 2019 Author Share Posted January 6, 2019 Omg my son has the stomach flu. He is barfing all over the bathroom even in the bathtub when he was having a bath. 🤢🤮 Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 6, 2019 Author Share Posted January 6, 2019 Took my son to the hospital. My mental health first aid came in handy . He had a total anxiety attack melt down on the ER floor . We did breathing exercises together and he calmed down . It was a super long wait for the ER about six hours and he couldn’t make it that long . I brought him home again and he has managed to keep down a Gravol and some Gatorade. And I had taken him in because he had stopped being able to pee but he has started peeing again . An older lady said she could see the strain in my face and eyes and asked if I had help with my Autistic son. I almost started to cry . I am so thankful that everybody was respectful of the fact that his meltdown was not within his control . I said no I don’t have help but thank you so much for your respect for him and for me . And she said oh it’s no problem he can’t help it . They are so very sensitive to pain and anxiety and can’t help melt downs. I said thanks so much for your support . ❤️ It means the world you have no idea . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 9, 2019 Author Share Posted January 9, 2019 Thank God no more puking!!! I passed that stage !!! Norovirus is on the way out. Hopefully hubby won’t get it and it won’t circle back around. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 12, 2019 Author Share Posted January 12, 2019 Finally a day for my husband and I go to out!!! Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 14, 2019 Author Share Posted January 14, 2019 Something I forgot to mention about Christmas time. My son met up with my former foster sister . My mom took him. I left that up to him but told my mom under no circumstances is she to get his cell number. He said it was good and he is glad he got to see her and he was glad she was doing ok for herself. My mom texts with her and meets her once in a while for a coffee at Timmies. She wants my mom to intercede with the family to accept her back after what happened. My mom said, “ for Papa that will never happen I am sorry. L makes up her own mind and B is not with D anymore and D most likely won’t either. “ Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 19, 2019 Author Share Posted January 19, 2019 My Shay continues to improve everyday. Having canines removed is very difficult for a little cat . They said it’s a very difficult surgery . His poor lower jaw had some swelling which is gone down now . She only had to remove three canines the fourth was still stable and the bone still looked good . She didn’t want to have to break his lower jaw by pulling that one . His tongue protrudes a tiny bit when he’s not thinking about pulling it in . He is still on soft food for now and is still trying to figure out how to lap up his water . And he’s in a lot less pain now . He’s on an antibiotic and an anti-inflammatory ,non-steroid med and gabapentin . I made up with my husband despite everything that happened . I can’t ruin a 30 year relationship and my child’s life over something that my husband just refuses to do . As heartbroken as I am I can’t destroy my child’s life . My mom and stepdad are heartbroken too. I still feel a lot of deep resentment though that will take time to go away . And I told him you are playing retirement exactly the way I want to do it . Everything has been your way ,one child ,the military, moving to butt crap nothing towns . You taking off to exotic lands while I sit in said bum crap town. Leaving my family . So retirement is played my way or else . I don’t want to hear any BS from you. And he started to say but but but but for someo that he wanted. Butts are for sitting on dude don’t even talk to me . Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 20, 2019 Author Share Posted January 20, 2019 Last night was the first time in a few days I actually felt any affection for him and cuddled up to him in bed. He had been sleeping on the couch. Even after 26 years in the same bed I still sleep better alone. I don’t think I will ever get used to sleeping at night and with people. He goes away this weekend and I am headed to my mom’s. This week they are deciding what surgery options she has for her wrist. Right now she is in a cast. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 20, 2019 Author Share Posted January 20, 2019 I feel like being mean in the moment but I will just shut up. Some opinions just drive me. They really do and drive me to want to be mean. But phew just control myself. Link to comment
Seraphim Posted January 21, 2019 Author Share Posted January 21, 2019 Wth!!!!!!!!! Is making a racket clearing the sidewalks at 5 AM really necessary ????????😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬 Link to comment
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