Seraphim Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 Well it took me forever and a day to fall asleep last night. Oiy! Last night little R and I went to the store around 9 o'clock and as we stepped out our back door the neighbor and his wife were in their yard. R almost knocked me backwards in his effort to try and race back in the house. He said that guy scares me mom. I have asked my son if he wants to go see the children's mental health counselor about his anxiety about this. He says no. And being that he's 16 I can't force him. She is the same lady that we took him to to get an agreement for an assessment. She told him he could talk to her anytime and she gave him her number. She told him he could talk to her and she can not tell me without his permission because he is 16. I told him that was fine and I would drive him anytime he wanted to go. At the same time she said she can not protect him from the neighbour because my son is 16 and therefore deamed able to defend himself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 She did however report them to CAS on something that I told her that happened a year and a half ago. She said that CAS had seven days to respond because it was a nonemergency. For emergency situations they have 12 hours to respond. And since CAS didn't show up,I'm assuming because he didn't pound my door down, that they did not consider it a critical problem. The lady did say however that probably they would not respond because of the length of time that had gone by but at least we've made a record of it. And I know CAS has been called on them before but not by me. She was wrestling whether not to call because she might make the situation worse for me with the idiot. I told her that she had to make the call just for those kids' sake and I would take the heat if it came. But the only thing I would not put up with would be him targeting my child and if that was the case I would just take my child to my mother. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 Today I took my son to a bee farm. They have some of the honeybees in glass hives. So we got to see the inner workings of a hive and the bees. He sat there for quite a while studying the bees. He was looking for the queen. Then he said, "lucky they didn't market honey as bee vomit ." Lol. He is priceless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 A year and a half ago? Why didn't you report it then? Can they even do anything about that anymore? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 A year and a half ago? Why didn't you report it then? Can they even do anything about that anymore? I reported stuff to my counsellor and she said she would handle it. And they were called on at the time. So I'm assuming either she made the call or the counselor that was counseling their daughter made the call. As far as I know they've been called on three times in the time they've been here. They didn't come out this time. The incident that I saw was him open hand smacking one of his sons in the back of the head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted July 5, 2014 Share Posted July 5, 2014 How come you don't call? Is CAS like CPS? I'm a little confused. If you originally reported to your counselor a year and a half ago and they called at the time for that incident, why would they do it again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 5, 2014 Author Share Posted July 5, 2014 How come you don't call? Is CAS like CPS? I'm a little confused. If you originally reported to your counselor a year and a half ago and they called at the time for that incident, why would they do it again? Yes, CAS is like CPS. I figured the report would mean more coming from another social worker as opposed to Joe Blow off the street. The recent councellor who called knows the family and she knows he abusive. She wants to protect the kids but me at the same time because I am her client. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 I got a sad call earlier from my mom earlier. My dad had called my brother and wanted him to visit. It seems my dad's health is failing more. They have told him that it is dialysis or death pretty much. He told my brother he is not choosing dialysis it's his life and he wants to die he will. He said he has no will to live and no reason to live. So I called my dad. And he pretty much told me the same thing. I started to cry and I said you know I love you, don't you dad? I said if you want to die dad it's your life. I won't push you into something you don't want. But I really want you to understand that I love you and I forgive you for everything daddy. And he said ,"yeah whatever I'll talk to you in a few days." * Sniffle * I told my mom that I felt like I was giving up on him. But my mother told me you're not giving up you are accepting reality. Your father wants to die he has no reason to live and you cannot give him a reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 As much bad feeling ,resentment, rage and acrimony have been between my father and I it is still going to break my heart when he is gone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 Eh just eh.....I HATE R being on nights. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 And the neighbours have abandoned their last cat. In the three years they've been here they have abandoned FIVE cats. They get rid of cats and then they get more. So I have been putting out food and water for the last cat they have thrown out. Man I despise these people. Plus they never get their cats fixed so then they go around mating with the other stray cats and create more stray cats. And they just laugh about it. If I get enough in taxes back I'm putting it for down payment on a house and getting the hell out of here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Being that counselors are mandated reporters, I am shocked she would have to grapple with the idea. She is mandated to report it. Ultimately, I am super glad they were contacted! I feel bad for your son. Try to be strong for him and show him it is reasonable to be cautious but not scared to leave his own home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 Being that counselors are mandated reporters, I am shocked she would have to grapple with the idea. She is mandated to report it. Ultimately, I am super glad they were contacted! I feel bad for your son. Try to be strong for him and show him it is reasonable to be cautious but not scared to leave his own home. She grappled with it because she says she has to protect her clients as well and I am her client. And she knows I suffer from very severe anxiety and that he has weapons in his house and a temper. She talk to her other colleagues in her office one of which happens to my counselor as well. They all agreed that they had to protect the children over me. And then she phoned me and told me her decision and I told her I was fine with that. I agree they have to protect children over an adult. They do not want me to have another severe relapse. That ultimately affects my child as well. I told her to go ahead I completely understand. And I told her not to feel bad she was doing what was right. And she gave her name to CAS to deflect it from me . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Well, it's not going to be directly linked to you. That family has been called on before as you say by others. It could be anyone. It is a difficult situation to be in, Vic. I empathize with you being afraid of backlash. Like I said in that one thread, K's ex always said "Yeah, remember that time you called the police.." Even though it was many times. Just so happened he was told it was me that time. You don't want to see people being hurt but a line has to be drawn somewhere. If she had kids there, shyte I would be sick over it and I don't know what I would do, if I'd be able to make the decision to stop calling the police. Knowing they were in there helpless. Here in the US, child deaths due to abuse/neglect in foster care are on a major incline. Really sick that anyone would take in kids just to exploit them or get some money then throw them to the wolves so to speak. It makes you wonder where the hell the lesser of the two evils is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrose85 Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Okay really? What do they do? Adopt kittens and when it’s not “cute” anymore, throw it away like garbage? Disgusting!! Grrrrrr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 It's just really hard for me because he is very aggressive. And after being beaten unconscious before I get very uptight. But I do want to protect those kids. And the counselor who called she's also the counselor helping my son get his reassessment. Plus she's also my boss and coworker. So she knows me really well. The base community is very very small and everybody knows everybody and everybody's business. And everybody is intertwined on many different levels. An extremely difficult community to navigate. True ,they might not tie it to me but since we have a really acrimonious neighbour relationship he very well could tie to me. He's just plain a very scary guy. He's also an enormous on a mountain kind of scale. Yeah ,there are bad foster parents but I just think of my mom too there are some really good ones. I'm just having a really hard time today. The strain is really kind of becoming unbearable because I've started to cry again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 Okay really? What do they do? Adopt kittens and when it’s not “cute” anymore, throw it away like garbage? Disgusting!! Grrrrrr Well ,they don't officially adopt anything Sherry. They get pets from their trashy friends who no longer want the pets they adopted and then when they go on holidays or get tired of the animal they throw it outside or kill it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheetarah Posted July 6, 2014 Share Posted July 6, 2014 Vic, you honestly need to put things into perspective. You can't be breaking down like this. It's not good. Your son is going to adopt your fearfulness. Yes, I understand that you have previous traumas. I don't have this particular trauma, but I know what it's like to get thrown off by someone. Like my attorney, I had about 45 minutes there where I regressed to the way I behaved after speaking to my ex. Shaky, crying, etc. Then I just had to tell myself I can empower myself here. I can move to resolution. I do not have to sit here being helpless, I will not let this paralyze me for another minute. I don't know if you're a gunowner, but if you are maybe you might considering going to the range for a refresher. Or investing in a pepper spray, or some other means of defending yourself, family and home. NOT because I think this guy is going to come barreling like a moose into your house, but because preparation is empowerment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 Guns are not easily obtained in Canada. You also can not carry a concealed weapon in Canada. I do know how to use one yes because of my military service. I believe mace is also illegal in Canada. But, yes, I need to find a way to empower myself. I was thinking security cameras which are legal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 My child is just so well behaved listen to this........ me: ( in a very calm matter-of-fact tone) please bring me your headphones you have been wearing them too much and you cannot hear us calling you and that is disrespectful ,you have lost those headphones for a week. Him: ( headphones in hand) here you go mom keep them and tell me when my punishment is over. No argument , no nothing...... Lol. Like I said that boy is every parent's dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 6, 2014 Author Share Posted July 6, 2014 It is the same old crap again with my mom. I will call to talk to her ,foster sister will start screaming and carrying on because she doesn't like us talking. She causes a big huge emotional upheaval drama every time I call. My mom will say talk to you later I can't talk now bye. I will call a few hours later my mom will say I'm feeding the baby or putting the baby to bed I have to go bye. She will tell me I will call you after they're in bed. I will call at 9 o'clock she'll say oh my gosh I'm so tired my head hurts I can't listen to another person. I'm taking my medications and going to bed see you tomorrow honey bye. It just pisses me off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 7, 2014 Author Share Posted July 7, 2014 [video=youtube_share;7NB9Ocs2eLU] ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 7, 2014 Author Share Posted July 7, 2014 Insomnia insomnia insomnia! I hate you insomnia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 7, 2014 Author Share Posted July 7, 2014 Well ,Cheet is right I have to figure out a way of conquering this anxiety. We have now gotten to the point where it's acting on my body rather harshly. The neon green diarrhea that's a big tip off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seraphim Posted July 8, 2014 Author Share Posted July 8, 2014 40 years of insomnia. God I just can't take it anymore. * cry* I have to go to work and I just can't take it. I just get so tired and it takes such a toll. When I'm tired it's almost impossible to control my emotions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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