wileycoyotee18 Posted April 16, 2010 Share Posted April 16, 2010 This is very tough for me to write as I have not told anyone in my life about this yet. (even though its only been a couple days).... Quick background - Girlfriend and I have been together for 5 1/2 years. lived together for about 4 1/2 years. Have a pet/lease together. On the verge of engagement.... So, the other day i'm laying in bed while my girlfriend is in the shower. I pick up her phone to play with it because i am bored. I find myself going through her inbox of txts. 85% of them are from me and her family, then just a few from random friends. I then went through the outbox of txts since i still had time to kill... I get near the end of the txts and see there are picture messages sent to my best friend of 17 years. 1st thought was pictures of our pet. 1st pic i see that was sent, was indeed of our pet! pheeew!...the next three however are pictures of herself half nude showing herself with shirt unbuttoned and bra hanging out, next is half laying on the bed in front of a mirror with her holding her breasts with no bra on and just panties, etc.......I didn't say anything to her when she got out, I held back any emotion since i was numb anyway. ~~~I must mention that my best friend and I have some history. Back freshman year of high school I did sleep with his girlfriend, whom told me they werent together anymore(no excuse i know). I was 14 years old, young and stupid and no grasp on what consequences to actions meant. I did however do the honarable thing and tell him what happened. It took him a couple months and after they broke up he forgave me and a couple jabs through out the years have come but none in the past 10 years!... 2nd part - he has been engaged for 6 months and the wedding is in 5...I am due to be his best man. We always hang out as couples. He has a history of cheating on his soon to be wife, along with getting girls to send pictures of themselves to him, up until now i thought it was ignorant, but funny(as far as the txt pics go not the actual cheating). Now its...well havn't figured that part out yet~~~ I have no idea where to begin on how to handle this, both with her and him. I fear that if I do bring it up I will find out things that I don't want to know. And if I don't that this will continue further and get more intense(if its not already) I want to be able to tell her to give me the full truth about everything now and eventually forgive her, but not sure if that does happen that i would. They have hung out on numerous occasions while I am at work and his fiance is either in bed to work early the next day or if she's at work. I actually encourage her to hang out with im because she doesn't really have any other friends other than work friends which she does not hang out with outside of work! Up until now i never suspected anything, largley due in part that we have been such good friends for so long that i feel that they he would think of her as a sister, which come to think of it he has said to me before!!!! How do i go about talking to her? She does mean a lot to me. I have played a bunch of different scenerios in my head. Blowing up at her and leave for a few days, come back to either talk about it, or to get my stuff and go...go the sobbing emotional route making her feel like complete poop which she has done to me...tell her she's crazy if she thinks i'm going to propose now...forgive and forget??? I think the way i react completley relys on the way she reacts when i tell her that i know. As far as handling this situation with him, I would really hate for him to say this is a 'what goes around comes around' deal, because this is a completeley different situation. . . I feel like I have a hold of two lives in the palms of my hands, and its not a power i want... This is the other dilema, do i tell his fiance what has been going on?!? She would be devestated! I have though of just dropping out of the wedding all together and letting him explain to everyone why his best man isn't there. That way they can go on and be happy together. I love this kid like he is my own brother, and I love my girlfriend as if she were my wife. This is just so heart wrenching that my mind is numb. I just don't know what to do... help! Link to comment
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