How can I improve my appearance?

[Fretless]

I am a 19-year-old male, and suffice it to say, I am below-average in the looks apartment. It's probably because of this that I've never dated, despite trying. What I want to do is figure out how to improve the way I look.

 

Here's my pic:

link removed

 

And here are some of the things I've been considering doing to myself:

 

-Alter/remove facial hair

-shave head

-keep losing weight (I've lost 8lbs since that photo was taken)

-microdermabrasion

-have moles removed

-get a slight tan

-rhinoplasty - I can afford it if I postpone my college plans

-go on antidepressants again - the side effects were a biatch, but at least I smiled once in a while

 

I appreciate everyone's input, especially from women.

 

Productive answers only please. I don't consider "self-confidence is more important than looks" to be a productive answer, and it's just not true at my age.

[WaitForever]

from what i have learned form women around me, although i am younger than you, is that it isnt about what you look like. for example theres this one goth kid and he is really ugly and wears torn shirts. but, he is alwayd talkin to many girls around him. why? because he has a good self esteem and scoializes with everyone. sure, you can get all that done but it would only help you for about a couple minutes. when you know a girl, she usually wants to know the real you and your personality. so what i would suggest is be very confident even if your dont fell you are, but others will see you as one. have high self esteem and have fun with everyone around you. i hope this has helped!

[1Adam12]

Fretless those are all very good ideas..I did the weight loss one right after graduating I lost a good bit of my weight and I still am able to keep it off with being able to workout all the time..Yes its helped me gain some self-confidence but...

 

WaitForever is right you gotta have a better self-esteem..if you walk around with your head down you'll not only run into a wall but you'll give off the vibe of unapproachable or depressing ..etc...but if you walk around with your head held high and walk with confidence stand tall dont slouch people will notice that also say Hi to people..act approachable and talk to girls more..just strike up a conversation with them..they won't bite you well maybe if your lucky!!!lol!!

 

Hope that helps some

 

Phil

[pherb]

Well, I'm a girl and I don't think you look bad looking at all!!

 

.....Just smile. Even if your just faking it!!!!!

[Suavemantotherescue]

Obviously losing weight kicks major butt! A good way to lose weight is to run everyday except maybe 1 day in a week, of course if you don't run much you might have to skip some days in the first few weeks. When you first start, you get killer sweat which is good, then go home and do another few exercises like push-ups or sit-ups or squats or whatever. Its best, if your a beginner, to begin with 3 sets of 10, then gradually increase the number you do by every 2 weeks or whatever your fancy. Cut back on Nacho chips and soda and other sweets. Eat breakfast everyday becasue that boost your matabolism, but its a good idea to work out before you eat because your body's matabolism is at its lowest when you get up, and all the fat from your body is prime for the cooking! You'll lose extra weight and get your heart rate up for the rest of the day so your matabloism will be higher, especially after breakfast. Working out also makes you feel great so you may actually be in a beeter mood. Like I said before, cut back on nacho chips and soda, but remember that still need carbs to run yor body, but dont eat too much, learn from your doctor how much you need. Remember to stay below 2000 calories a day because you gain 1 pound of fat per 3500 cals, but you burn that when you function.

 

Another good thing to do is to wash your face and stuff like that. IF you want to get rid of your bread thats good, but you don't have to nessacarally. Try trimming your facial hair like the little hairs around your face, all around your bread so your skin looks smoother. Wash your face with Clean & Clear Morning Burst, it actually does wake you up because it feels pretty cool on your face becaue of those bubble bead thing-ama-jigg dudes. Also smells like oranages so you'll smell nice I guess, try spraying deodorent spray or coloange (I can't spell) so you'll smell good too.

 

One last thing, talking to girls. (Oh no!!!) Never fear, Suaveman is here! (yay....). What you wanna do is be yourself, however, be your good self; don't be like "I'm so depressed. The world sucks and the economy is in shambles..." Try to be funny, like don't tell jokes but try making obviously funny observations of your dayly life. Try to find out wat your date is in to, like if she likes puppys try to think of puppy stuff you do, "I have a dog named Bart and he barks too much, maybe you could help me train him." Complament her on something like her hair or whatever you notice is nice, but don't go too deep, you can tell her shes funny but thats about it. Don't forget to laugh and enjoy her company and try to find the goodness in her, she could be a vet so think of how kind she is and nothing else, this way you'll always be happy with her. Well thats about all I got, I'm not good at woredrobe so maybe someone else can help you with that. Good luck.

[VickiRose]

Hey Fretless,

Okay first of all you dont have below-average looks. You are a decent looking guy. We live in a society where beauty is everything, and also there is a huge trend in the makeover industry on television...

Okay, so you want to improve your looks... First all it comes from the insideout, like self-confidence is the most sexiest thing a man could have. As for you outside appearance, like I said your a goodlooking guy... It wouldnt hurt to shave to have a nice clean cut look, that includes all facial hair, and maybe a bit plucking of the eyebrown. Also clothing makes the man, a GQ style is very sexy... Good hygenie is a plus... You could start lookin in mens magazines for new looks and stuff, to get a brief of idea of the style you would like to accomplish... Good luck on finding your new look...

[Celadon]

I like what everyone's suggested so far. My suggestion is to figure out what YOU think looks good and DO it. That way, you'll like how you look and feel comfortable and confident.

 

Like VickiRose said, look through a bunch of magazines and find a style you like. It doesn't have to be extreme or expensive. Just whatever rocks your boat. Notice the details that go into a style -- like, for shirts. What kind of fabric, how long are the sleeves? Is it button up? IS there a big collar or small one? What do guys wear with that type of shirt?

 

You could get some tips by going into a department store and asking a clerk to show you some things. (You don't have to buy.)

 

But aside from that, clean and neat is usually a plus. No one is attracted to someone who doesn't look like they care about themselves. Good luck!

[stevo89]

Here's what I suggest.. You should first shave you entire face for a nice clean look. Next you should try experimenting with various hairstyles, its amazing how different you can look depending on your hair. For losing weight I suggest eating just a regular healthy diet, taking a multivitamin everyday, and most importantly exercise! When first starting to run, start small then gradually work your way up because you want to run at least 1-2 miles a day, but remember that even if you feel a bit tired and you're burning all over just keep going because thats the only way you'll get stronger and lose weight! I hope that I helped you out a bit..

[amaranth_04]

Hi,

 

I think you look just fine. If you're looking for tips to improve, try creating a style that suits you. You don't have to spend a whole lot, just attention to detail. For example, if you're going out, try wearing a shirt with a collar, make sure your clothes are pressed, things like that. It seems a trivial issue but it's the little things that people pick up on to get a whole impression of you.

 

As the other posts have suggested, good hygiene is a must. You could try shaving your facial hair as you said, trimming the eybrows. They are only a small part of your face but the eyebrows give a 'finished' look to your appearance. Talk with your hairstylist about which haircut suits you. Instead of drastically shaving your head and not liking it, then waiting months for it all to grow back , try a different style. You could try a short fringe that falls lightly accross your forehead to ''slim'' down a wide forehead. Just go for the little things as they all add up. There's no reason for you to go for surgical options.

 

And lastly, as everyone has said, you need to work on your self-confidence. Just by appearing cheerful, people will be drawn to you. See if you talk about the right things when you meet people; some of us are quite sensitive and could take offence when none was intended. It's easier to start off a conversation on shared interests; keeps it from being too prying but at the same time, you feel a connection with one another.

 

Start hanging around with a group of like-minded people. Once you gain confidence from the sense of belonging there, you can venture out easily to try and know all sorts of people.

 

Hope this helps some.

[JonnyG]

The picture was not what i expected. Thought u looked better than u were making out.

 

Right, heres what i suggest:

 

Continue to lose the love handles, try to tone up your muscles (go the gym). Give yourself and advantage over the average guy.

 

Shave the facial hair, but keep a bit of stubble if u like. I like a bit of a stubble cause it makes me look more mature and suits me.

 

Get a tan. It makes u look nicer and healthier.

 

Those 3 things alone will help make u feel much better looking, raising that inner confidence.

[single4good]

Yeah I agree with most comments here ...there is nothing wrong with your looks, i think self confidence is the key. Having said this I think changing your appearance losing weight ect is a good idea in large part because it may help boost your self esteem.

[NightLily]

Well a lot of people here have said stuff about self confidence which is very true, but I won't get into that.

 

If you want an honest answer on how I think you can improve your looks, here it is:

-I would suggest maybe plucking your eyebrows or getting them waxed so that thy are still manly, but not quite as thick or bushy.

-smile! Chances are, if you had been smiling in that picture I would have thought you were a lot more attractive..

-I would agree that you should shave to the point where you have maybe a shadow or a little stubble. Especially if you have a strong chin hidden underneath that beard.

-just work on losing a few pounds or spend some time outside enjoying yourself.

-also, I would try updating your hairstyle.

 

Other then that, you have cute eyes (big and brown puppy dog eyes. heh) and you aren't in any way repulsive looking. And oh yes, about the nose job? I really doubt you need one. If you were female MAYBE, but guys can pull off noses with a little bit of character to them. In most cases, it actually makes them look better.

 

Peace,

SuzyQ

[downout]

The most important aspect of your appearance is to feel confident and happy with who and what you are. I think we all have features about ourselves that we wish we could change and in this day and age and after watching the swan it is possible to siginifcantly alter your looks with extensive plastic surgery. I know its hard to feel confident and good about yourself when you arent happy with your personal appearance. But we are who we are, you were born that way and there is nothing wrong with feeling good about that. Also everyone is attracted to something different some like fat some skinny some like blue eyes and others like black. Its important to find someone who will like you for who you are and there is someone who will. With that being said there is nothing wrong with improving your physical image. A good diet and excercise has incredible benefits both physically and mentally. You might even meet someone in a local gym while working out. I personally love to swim, it works all of the muscles in the body and is low impact. As for excessive body hair I guess you could try nair or something like that. Laser hair removal is permanent though fairly expensive. A rhinoplasty is more drastic but I guess if you feel your nose is really that big or you want to re-sculpture it then go for it though it looks fine to me. Clothes can help but i believe its whats wearing them that really counts.