Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[blnm]

Missing you so much right now.

 

wine is really not good for me at the moment as it seems to make me cry more.

 

Why are you emotionally unavailable? I would be happy to be with you even when you don't even want to support me. Am I but a friend to you?

 

Why did my heart choose to fall in love with you?

[Hi Its Me]

Dear Ex,

 

Today is the first day I woke up knowing that the hope is gone. It's exactly 3 months to the day since you said it's over and I still don't know why. The past four years have been amazing and yes, I know we had our ups and downs but who doesn't? I thought that this year would be the year we really would look back at in 10 or 20 years time and smile. You might still do so, but not for the reasons I had hoped.

 

When we first met our bond was unbreakable, as time went by our love grew beyond anything I could ever imagined. Everyone I knew was jealous of our relationship because we were perfect together. As the weeks turned into months, I started to realize that you are the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I sacrificed everything, gave everything to be with you even though at time you simply went after your goals without considering my feelings. You found a job abroad, took off and it was down to me to follow you. I did, I tried to adjust but I can honestly admit I wasn't mentally prepared for it.

 

I made a lot of mistakes, mostly letting outside problems effect the way I was with you. I went back home to work on myself, to work on becoming the man I always knew I could be, the man you deserve. It was you who told me that you want to be with me again. It was you who told me that you cannot imagine yourself not being with me. I always made sure that you know it always was the same for me too. Things were going great now, we had actually become the couple we once were, even better actually. Marriage was just round the corner, a new life abroad was something we both looked forward to - everything we ever wanted was suddenly possible and without warning, you dump me like I never even mattered. Four years gone, just like that. You immediately started something with a new man and even though I was the one crushed, I kept chasing you.

 

You came back to our country, still spoke with me every day and met up with me often. You never took away the hope of us getting back together, especially after all our talks and more importantly, you actually seeing that I have made the changes I promised and was happy with the result. It was only a week ago when you told me you no longer was dating the rebound, that you wanted to meet up again even though we agreed to give each other space. I picked you up, we had dinner, went back to my place and fell asleep in each others arms. I know you felt something but you chose to ignore your heart and let your mind take over.

 

After the conversation we had yesterday I know we are done. You blamed me for not giving you time and space when we both had agreed on the meetings we had. You told me you got irritated when I became an emotional wreck and that it drove you back into the rebound's arms again. We are now on separate paths yet I still wish it was not the case. I woke up today feeling nothing, no pain, no sadness, no regret. I am empty and I guess I realize that you will not be coming back, even though you told me you need this time to think. You told me you want to come back and it will be once and for all but I doubt this will happen, especially since you will be spending your birthday on holiday with my replacement. In exactly 3 months you will move back abroad, something which I thought we would do together. Now I know this will not happen, the hope is gone and I am left to pick up the broken pieces of me.

 

I love you and always will. I wish you all the happiness you desire and I am sorry you could not see what I see, that together we would have an amazing life. You never know if our separate paths might lead us to be together again but I know I will not be holding my breathe. Thank you for the wonderful times. I am sorry for the bad ones. I know you will bounce back whilst I remain trapped between the past and the future. If only you see what I see...

 

Take care ex

 

Always,

 

Me

[Chinafish]

I just found out your taking **** on holiday in a months time. A few days ago we were talking about going away together.

 

You've been using me all these months, taking my pain and turning it to hope.

 

I'll never understand why.

 

Does she know you spent the night here with me? does she know you message me, call me constantly

 

I always thought she was your rebound - someone you chose to fill the void left by me. You've cheated on her, yet you prefer being with her than me.

 

. I left my children for you.

[r0ckox]

you've been lying to me for years, and you tell me what you think i want to hear to shut me up. you demand respect but don't ever give any. everything i do/say/think/feel is wrong, but it's perfectly okay for you to do/say/think/feel whatever you want without conviction.

 

you're a terrible person in my eyes and i truly cannot wait for the day i've forgotten all about you.

 

f-ck you.

[GrowingUp85]

I dreamed about you last night. The first time, I woke up happy at first, but then grew sad when you weren't there. I feel asleep again, only to dream that we were together again. Today is your birthday. I hope you enjoy yourself.

[Ezzie]

Day 12 of NC...18 days left, i gotta stay strong! I had a dream last night about you... woke up feeling sad and longing for you...i miss you a lot and i hope you are doing well. i hope you miss me too and will be willing to talk to me again soon. and thank you for not shutting the door on us.

[GrowingUp85]

Haha! When you dumped me, you told me you were rid of boys "for a while." So today, I run into you at a bar we both frequent. It's your birthday. We're both obviously nervous to see each other, but we say hello and exchange pleasantries. You then introduce me to Mark. I then watch as you walk away, two drinks in hand, to get into his car, on your way to dinner with friends. Haha. I used to be "Mark." In a way, it feels alot better.

[Roundabout]

Its been 1 week since you got the remainder of your belongings, I wish I didn't still miss you. You gave up on our family and the future we could've had. If you weren't such an introvert I would've known how you felt, instead I'm alone in our apartment unable to believe what has happened. I still sleep on my side of the bed, wishing you were next to me. I keep telling myself move on, there will be another, but all I want is you.

[MasterPo]

Ahh... I hate Friday nights. Listening to a mix I put together when I was hurting pretty bad, I do this every now and then ... probably to make it real like the Jesuits that beat themselves every time they feel good. Yeah, something like that.

 

Music brings back the memories of being heartbroken but still functioning. I remember helping my Dad in the high country, getting wood and running that godawful chainsaw. I thought of you every beautiful cold day. I missed you so much and several times I just sat and wanted to bawl. Bawl and let out whatever was festering inside of me. Oh my god, it hurt so bad. I was only at a year point five I think.

 

Last December you told me that particular time was hard on you and you came looking for me. I never took you to the ranch but you told me that you tried to find it ... and find me. I remembering being instantly furious, so angry that I couldn't speak and when I could I changed the topic. I was furious because I didn't believe you. I didn't believe you! It would have been such a happy time if you had only ... well, what am I getting worked up for.. its friggin over.

 

You should be married by now. For some reason, maybe just me being me, I thought you would call or text telling me you were either married or changed your mind. Raising a child is expensive so I don't see you ducking a marriage for me. I don't know what to think of your activities, I know I should let it go and be happy. I know that but it keeps coming back and I am weary of doing battle every damn day. Maybe I'll just ask for divine help and be done with it. lol. Maybe..

 

So its Friday and I'm alone. I wish I had someone to talk to or someone to disappear into but I can't do that. I won't. Whoever comes after you needs all of me not the me that pines for you.

 

Tomorrow I will go up north again. I will keep busy, I will visit people I haven't seen in a long time and from time to time I will remember you. Please go away I want to be happy and not have your damn ghost following me around. Ach...

[tness]

Day 60 I think.

Difficult. The same Friday in 2011 me and my Ex went to USA. This year I'm sitting here alone. What shall I do?

The only thing I can do is wait, I'm praying every day that she will start to think positive about me, perhaps when she see me now, maybe I will create a new spark? But I'm just fooling my selves, I know. But I just love her, and it's nothing wrong with that...

[quirky]

Really miss having fun with you, not many are as excitable and enthusiastic as we were. Why are you not contacting me at all..why? Somebody asked me the other day 'was it a bad breakup?' and I said 'no, just a very painful one' and they asked me why did we break up and I didn't quite know what to say.

[Aleina2011]

So it seems that dating other men eventually does the trick, I no longer pine over you, my heart no longer aches because of you. I don't seem to have much luck though, I don't seem to have grown a thick skin after the BU. I am back on here and this time it's not because of you. He is not an ex, he was never a bf...still, I had hopes and expectations, and it hurts all the same, a mini BU, but it hurts, it stings...anyway, at least this must mean that I am over you.

[Squito]

I can't stand that you are out there having a great time and going on all these dates with this new girl of yours, meanwhile a little over a month later and I'm still stuck picking up the pieces of how much you hurt me. It sickens me that I know you feel absolutely no guilt about what you did and in that twisted head of yours you've convinced yourself that you have reason to be mad at me and that I'm a horrible person even though I was NOTHING but good to you. I'm trying my hardest to think of one thing I ever did to wrong you and I honestly from the bottom of my heart can't come up with anything. I only wanted to be there for you and get some kind of solid answer but you took the coward's way out. Somewhere buried deep in that conscience of yours you know how much of a complete heartless bastard you are and someday it will rear its ugly head, and who knows how many people you'll have pushed away by then. You come up with so many reasons to hold grudges against people and you never let them go. That's no way to go through life. It's true that we need to look out for ourselves first and foremost, but that doesn't mean you should lose all tact and courtesy whatsoever.

 

But I'm done with these silly little fantasies I have in the back of my mind of if or when you'll contact me again and what I'd say or how I'd react. The memories of when you were good still hurt me and I miss them. The thought of this new girl of yours being able to experience that person I thought I knew still hurts me. But you were right about two things. 1) When you would tell me I'm strong. Damn right I'm strong. I'm going to get through this in time and learn from it and truly will become a stronger person. I've been doing really well and making strides but I've just been hitting a rough patch the last week or so. But you didn't learn anything and you'll keep up with your ways and sit there wondering why your life turned out the way it has. 2) "It's not you, it's me". You're right. Completely and totally right.

[Ezzie]

Day 13 of NC! I can't believe it's almost been 2 weeks, it seems pretty fast actually. Just 17 more days and I'll still be working on myself in the meantime! Hope you miss me!!

[soybeans]

So happy to say that there is no more longing, or questioning why you did what you did, wondering where you are, whatever. Its become ridiculous at this point to still care so much. I barely thought of you today. You're so far gone its not even funny. There is literally no way in hell you would ever come back now. It feels weird because the memories are becoming more and more hazy in my mind. Its like sand slipping through my fingers. But I still remember so vividly how I felt when I fell for you, and it really was something amazing.

 

I've been going on dates lately. Yeah, maybe it isn't really going anywhere or happening the way we began but at least I'm meeting new guys and seeing that there are better out there. I have some hope for myself.

 

I'm making some changes at my job. Getting ready to start my internship and go into my last semester of college. You will not share in these moments like I had hoped for but its for the best. I'm proud of me. Thats all I need right now.

[GrowingUp85]

You're so pretty. I miss you. I hope you're happy

[humanity]

She broke your spirtits and u admitted that u had emotional problems from her.

 

And then you and I began dating, and I helped u gain some self confidence again. And now you left me..... for her?? the same girl that gave u oh-so-many emotional probelms????? And now I'm the one who is all shook up by you, by her. Why did u do this to me?? why???? I was perfectly happy until u came into my life. And now I'm the sad one. While u and her are having the time of your lives.

[OkayThen]

I invested all my time, all my effort, all my love, all my ambitions, all my future, all my money, all my spirit, all my health, all my care, all my sexual expression, all my patience, all my forgiveness, all my pride, all my reasoning, all my sleep, all my credit, all my lunch breaks, all my thought space, all my dreams and all my everything for you and there's a huge part of me that thinks you ended what we have so that I can find the girl out there in this world who would give me all of that back and more but that does not make me sleep, does not make me stop crying, does not make me eat, does not make me smile, does not make me stop thinking of you every second of the day, does not make me feel so crushed, does not motivate me, does not make me want to get out of bed, does not make me feel less physically sick, does not make me stop going to my psychologist, does not make me have a mini heart attack when my phone rings because I think it might be you and does not make me love you any less.

[einsteins_girl]

I've been doing so well - much better - but I woke up, and it's pouring rain, and suddenly I miss you. A-ha-ha! It's hilarious in its own tragic way actually. Oh well, I'll just ride the wave, I guess.

[Moggs]

You told me very early on that your dad taught you to always treat women with respect......... well you didn't seem to get that message properly, because IM sure treating a woman with respect includes saying goodbye when its all over........ you let me down, i thought better of you.

[einsteins_girl]

Ok, I amend my previous statement. I don't think this is actually me missing you; this is me missing companionship. Big difference.

[dmarie86]

I was going to say I miss you but if im honest with myself I dont think I do, I miss the feeling of thinking that you loved me. Its still killing me inside that you moved on so quickly, I know healing takes time but I can't help but feel that it's so unfair that im struggling to forget you and I doubt I even cross your mind anymore. It's been two months.... Will you think of me on the holiday we were suppose to go on together? Why do I even care. Keep trying to remind myself about the fact that it doesnt matter what you're up to anymore we are split and its for the better I know that I really do. But it doesnt make it any easier

[soybeans]

I didn't have to see those photos, it's my own fault for looking. But its interesting, you weren't smiling in any of them. But you look like you have been working out...you actually have a six pack going on. Damn.

 

But I can look past the physical and see how ugly you truly are inside.

[dmarie86]

isn't subconscious cruel sometimes.... have been busy with the move the last couple of days but feeling good, you still crossed my mind alot but not to the point where i felt helpless or overwhelmed with emotions, but then i wake up this morning and the realisation that you would of taken her up to your sisters the w.e we were supose to say goodbye hit me like tonne of bricks..... you called her the night before and i'm guessing you offered to take her partway up, thats why you called your sister so late and why you were in touch with her the next morning, sorting it all out. thats how you knew id done the crazy thing of calling the number and why shes became friends with your sister, and why else would she have messaged her in such a familiar way without having met her. you seemed so upset that you wouldn't get to say goodbye to me but i now realise that must have been guilt because you put her first, you choose to drive a girl you barely knew over ending a relationship of 3 years on good terms. i know we were broken up and thats what i have to focus on, that and the fact that if you moved on that fast i need to accept that i didn't mean what i thought to you. i know i deserve better but this is yet another setback i have to deal with. i don't want to keep bringing it up anymore but my personality is obsessive and im struggling. i need to stop allowing myself to wallow in the horrible memories that keep bubbling up, use them to remind myself you're not worth it, but it still seem to be addicted to torturing myself. i don't think what you felt was feeling bad anymore, i think it was just guilt that you hurt me as much as you did. i know the future will be better and there are many amazing things waiting for me.... i just need to let go of the past!

[soybeans]

You are so off that pedestal. I'm looking at things a LOT differently now. I know everyone says after a break up that their exes have changed...but it really is true with you. And Im not saying that just because you didn't want to be with me anymore but because your whole lifestyle and overall demeanor is different. I know for sure that you are not who I fell in love with, thats plain to see. I don't even recognize you.

 

I'll admit I am kind of jealous of this girl but I'm trying to keep it in check. I don't know if there is anything going on between you but I can assume so. Maybe you treat her nice or maybe she just isn't as submissive to you like I was. You definitely do drugs with her so thats a plus, right? Must mean you respect her, maybe she's more girlfriend material. I try to control it in my head but you're going to do whatever you want no matter how much I wish I could stop you.

 

I also realize that nothing you do could ever help. I know I want closure, an apology or something but it won't take away the hurt you caused or the hell I endured to move past this break up. It might be a temporary good feeling but I don't need that from you. I can't look to you to make the pain go away, the one who caused it.