Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[NANNYSTUDENT]

Thank you for showing me your true colors. I don't want to believe it-- but I know I have to. I can lie to anyone but not to myself and you have ripped my heart out. My shirt is tear soaked in the middle of a sunny afternoon. I never thought you would be the one to hurt me--- but as they say--- the one's who weren't supposed to hurt you are the ones that do, probably because of the power people like you are given by people like me that love you. So sad.

 

My heart is broken. And you have no cares in the world. Such a sad place to be.

 

I wonder if you will ever understand what it means to love the way I loved you. It is something that takes a strong person.... even though I may appear weak right now... to love you the way I did takes a strong person, someone who understands that happiness isn't what you give yourself but what you give to those around you.

 

For you to realize that, you would have to let go of your selfishness... sadly, I don't see that happening. I pray that God will allow me to meet someone who will erase your memory for my tired, exhausted, heart and mind.

[MissieP]

Forget you,forget you..... You are so not worth my time and energy anymore. I have looked at past e-mails and I have realized I am much better off without you. You were never nice to me and I wish one day karma bites you and you realize how mean you really were but you are so self-centered it probably wouldn't even phase you.

[happy_camper]

you broke my heart before. ripped it to shreds. And though I never meant to hurt you, part of me feels..................what goes around comes around. I am sorry to be the one who hurts you. but you were never sorry. you always said you'd never find someone who loves you the way I did. guess you should have worked harder to keep me then. your loss.

[Springs]

Oh my word.... I'm HAPPY!!! I'm moving on, I'm getting over you, I realise there is such an amazing world out there full of wonderful people and opportunities. For the first time in sooooooo long I feel like me again. I'm getting there I knew it would come but it's about time. Couldn't care less if I hear from you again. Whatever. You missed out and didn't realise how valuable it was to have someone who loved you as much as I did. Too bad. I'm happy

[Colour Me Once]

Dear indie band t shirt creep,

 

I think you are an absolutely disgusting human being. Either your a complete narcissist and arent sorry for anything, or those two piffling times you said sorry you meant it. That means you have empathy - so you should always remember what horrible, terrible things you said and did. I'll never get back all the time and effort and love I wasted on you - I went from being a happy, warm bright bubbly girl into an anxious, frightened woman on the edge all the time. You are a selfish, manipulative man and I feel sorry for the silly insecure little girl you're with right now - because its all sunshine and roses and you're making each other feel fantastic right now - but you don care about being a mature man, getting to know someone, working on problems - its your way or nothing.

 

You make me feel so sick and I feel totally ashamed of how much of a year was wasted on you - who mocked sexual abuse, criticized me to a point where I was screaming at you to stop, slapped me right in the face just for smiling, stole money from my wallet and made me go to yours to get it back, lied, didnt even split up with your ex, went straight back to her, bought her presents instead of me, called me annoying in bed, called me repulsive, called me a piece of * * * * , stuffed tissues in my mouth when I was crying, threatened to go to the police because I hit you after you hit me, took photographs of every mark I made after your constant verbal and emotional haranguing, but made me tear a piece of paper with a list of abuse you'd done to me to shreds. Told friends I was paranoid so that I was too embarassed to ever see them again, wouldnt even give me a hug when I was panicking, made me throw out boxes of furniture, food and clothes because you wouldnt carry half of it to yours on the train, with me carrying the other half and store it for me for a few months. Made me call samaritans when I was having a panic attack becayse 'I can't say anything nice to you right now' and sat right next to me silently listening to me sob to them on the phone.

 

I felt so much guilt for my behaviour - did so much self examination and in the end started to hurt myself so I wouldnt lash out at your disgusting emotional abuse. I have a scar on my leg that will never heal and always reminds me of how mad I became with you. I used to be such a happy strong person.

 

I despise you more than anyone else. You were a complete, utter mistake and I cant wait for the day when I forget you. Prancing, make up wearing, arrogant, vain, skinny, shallow, idiot. A grown man who cant chop a vegetable, who cant leave the house without primping himself for two hours, who keeps his age a secret from everyone and is so blindly racist he actually thinks there is scientific evidence to prove one group of women are more attractive than another.

 

Every bloke I've met before and since being with you has been ten steps up on the ladder - especially the one I'm currently with. The kind of insidious control and abuse you did was totally different to the way I lashed out by reaction, yet I was the one blaming myself and feeling guilt, whilst you withdrew basic things from me 'because of my bad behaviour'.

 

Enough. I just want to be free from all this resentment and unbridled hate I have for you. I want to feel sorry for you, as I did when I first met you. I'm getting better slowly. Slowly being the key word. You are the kind of creep that jumps into bed with the next woman a week after you break up. And yet you accuse me of doing that. God knows why I care about your opinion, it is worth absolutely nothing, like you, like your ex turned into from being around you, like I almost became before I saw sense, and like the next poor sod will be once you're done with her.

[Daisy88]

Sometimes it makes me feel like such a loser that I'm still missing you after all this time when clearly you don't give a s**t about me or else we'd be together now. Screw you for wasting the last few years of my life. Screw you for leading me on/stringing me along making me think we were going to get married and have a family together when clearly it was all just a bunch of s**t. I'm sure you're probably having a great time f'ing your new GF tonight. F you a**hole.

[gardnergirl2]

I am sure you are with your new gal tonight. That's fine. Well, not really, but we'll say it is. I didn't respond to you today and I am very proud of myself. I told you that I will cease to exist for you and that is what I have done. You don't deserve a woman like me honestly. You have got the kind you deserve. We'll see how she plays you.

[LSgirl]

It's Day 11 of NC, almost Day 12 in a couple hours. I'm pretty buzzed from drinking wine out with a friend tonight. It's Friday night, 10:24pm, and I'm here at home thinking about you. Whenever I drink, I do want to text you, but I'm glad I have kept up with NC since the day of the breakup. You drink so much, I'm surprised it doesn't make you want to contact me, too. I havent heard from you since Day 6 of NC, not sure why I expect you to reach out to me again. You said you wanted me to talk to you again someday, I just can't do that right now, not even in a month. It will take at least a few months to get past this emotional stage and see you in a different light. I want to feel indifferent, to not care if you met someone new. Maybe you hooked up with somebody, who knows. I know I haven't and not interested in anyone right now. Do you miss me? Why do I even ask this..it doesn't matter anyway but it would help to know you still did have strong feelings for me. I'm not trying to ignore you, sometimes I feel angry at you, but I don't regret our time together, even though you didn't see me in your future, you really challenged me. It just makes me sad you couldn't get over your ex, or I just wasn't the right one.

[Musical77]

How are you T?

 

I've been doing pretty good in regard to you. I still think about you every day - crazy at it is. But I don't feel pain or hurt, just still a little sad at different points.

 

I have other worries at the moment. My dad is not himself and my mum is worried sick about his memory. She has stomach pains and her blood pressure has shot up. He turns 70 next month and has had a really bad last 5 years with his heath........diabetes, heart trouble, cancer. He takes so many pills. I know he's worrying about his cancer blood test coming up in May and I told my mum that stress and worry make you forgetful, so I hope to god that's what it is. I know she worries about it being something else.

 

I've got to be strong for her because she is even more of a worrier than I am. And I will.

 

Honestly I just could do with something really nice happening to me right now and I don't care if that sounds selfish. Anyway I don't know why I'm telling you this! Guess just saying life goes on, there is always something to worry about and that's the same for most people. I'm sure you still have worries, but you choose not to share them with anyone.

[blueplanet22]

Wondering why a week after I asked you, my package of "my stuff" that you said you'd send still hasn't arrived.

 

I am guessing your holding onto it as an excuse, so that I have to talk or chase you. Its pathetic. So commitment phobe. I'm never coming back, know that so holding onto my stuff won't work in your favour either, it just makes you even more of a C * * * especially as I asked you to give back my dead Nan's cookbook. How low can your moral compass actually be.

 

Totally unexistant in your case.

[Melting]

I will always have a piece of you in my heart, but I am moving forward now.

[CreativeMind]

Idk what to do right now. I want to send you a text. I'm so worried about you. I don't trust him, I think he's going to hurt you and I'm afraid you wont come to me and you'll end up doing something stupid. I feel so helpless right now.

[CreativeMind]

I really want to know if you're okay. I hate this feeling. Why don't you just understand that I'm * * * * ing worried about you? Why do you push away the people that care about you the most? I'm going to end up texting you later tonight, I'm feeling so weak I don't think I can hold back. And I just know you're going to tell him I texted you, because he's been controlling and manipulating you even more than before. I'm so * * * * ing sick of this.

[soybeans]

I shouldn't have went on my sister's phone before to snoop at your FB and now I remember why it is best to stay away. Saw some check-ins at bars, as if you are bragging that you're doing fine. Saw some newly added girls from random locations....saw you added your psycho ex-girlfriend too, who just so happened to recently date the guy I am seeing now. Small world. Well from what I hear about her, you're both absolutely perfect for each other. Wonder why you ever broke up. I also can't stop laughing about how my guy dumped her solely on the fact that she was dumb. Match made in heaven, you two!

 

I thought about it and I don't think you even want a nice girl. I think you WANT someone like her because you know you're incapable of a good healthy relationship. I guess it makes a little more sense if I tell myself that. I don't miss you anymore, I'm not sad, now I just feel anger building up.

[Love1336]

Yes, I am ignoring you.

You really didn't believe i was going to break up with you.

I am moving forward. I hate... the fact I can't text you back.

But I can't lie I am glad I am seeing your text.

After a month... maybe i will contact you.

Ignoring is hard, but after a week you'll let your pride get to you, and stop texting me. *hopefully*

I'm done being unhappy.

I am done trying with you. Maybe, with your next girlfriend, you will GIVE EFFORT.

Maybe you won't be such a cruel cold wall? Hopefully.

I love you & miss you.

[Love1336]

Maybe in a month, you'll miss me so much and change?

I don't know... but I am hoping for some type of change.

Whether it's for me to accept we're over, or for us to get better. SOMETHING. Any type of change is better then, us fighting, me trying to figure out what's wrong. You never asking me how i am doing.

you drive me crazy with your non sensitive comments!

You being CRANKY.

US NEVER HAVING SEX. YES. I am a WOMAN who LOVES SEX.

Geeze.

I can DO better, WATCH ME.

[Love1336]

Tonight, all I have to say to you is...thank you. Thank you for freeing me so I was able to move on to better things. You letting me go was the best thing you could have done and I now see that it was for the best.

 

Have fun trying to find someone like me. You'll never find someone who cared about you as much as I did. Your loss. I mean that with every fiber of my being.

[soybeans]

 

Well it's true. We have so much love inside to offer and we deserve someone worthy of it, who will cherish us. It hurts now but soon enough you and I will both realize how toxic those relationships were. Someday you'll laugh at his pathetic existence when you find someone that would never even imagine of letting you go.

[secondchance67]

Thank you for going completely NC from day 1.

I watch so many good people here struggle and go thru so much pain because their ex's continue to throw them breadcrumbs, contact them email, text, etc.....and all it does is prolong the agony and impede their healing.

 

Thank you for being the cold hearted, cheating , lying scumbag you really are inside....turning your back on me is, in reality, the best thing you could have done for my healing.

 

Thank you for walking away into the arms of someone else, never giving me another thought.

 

Guess what?

 

You did that......and it allowed me to meet someone new.

 

Yep, that's right...I did it the right way - you did it the way you have always done it, you overlapped, set it up, pulled the trigger, and vanished into thin air and right into the next relationship without as much as a breath between him and me.

 

She seems interested, friendly, genuine and mature.....and I am glad to have met her..... I am not ready for a relationship with her or anyone , nor she with me, but a friendship seems very likely - she just came out of something messy as well, and we connected immediately over our similar story of heartache......

 

I have you to thank for this, and every other woman I meet, get involved with, and give to what you didn't want or recognize the value of: my heart and ME.

 

This is not your " free pass to forgiveness ' from me by a long shot....that will come in time.

 

This is just a "thank you" for doing what I wasn't strong enough to do, but knew was needed: ending it once and for all

[Daisy88]

I actually didn't think of you very much at all today. When I did think about you, it was with indifference rather than anger & bitterness or sadness. It felt pretty nice to just feel neutral towards you today and most of all it felt great not to obsess about you. I'm finally starting to believe that I really will be okay even GREAT...with OR without you.

[Snowy]

You said you think about me when it rains.

 

Well, let me tell you - I think about you rain, hail or shine; though with indifference.

[potty46]

Yes this again is long, but I hope you read it.

 

Thank you for last night. It's not nice arguing but its something that needed to be done (although it didn't change how I feel). I'm still struggling with all of it, and now knowing how you coped after... I dunno, maybe if i had of done things differently post BU we also wouldn't be here. I do want to make clear that I called you a coward out of anger and spite, I felt ripped off of a conversation... It shouldn't have taken two months, for us to be drunk and for me to bail you up to have had it. Maybe the conversation when I asked for it would have been nicer and I wouldn't be feeling as though you somehow hate me

 

I believe you when you say you miss me, and that this had to be done. Because it did, obviously you had your issues with us and (I guess) tried to deal with them but got to the last straw. I can't help but feel bad because I didn't see these signs. I was and still am a true believer of communication and compromise... we lost that. I used you as an emotional crutch coming off that boat, I didn't know how to deal with what was going on and the only thing that (i thought) was going okay was us... And when that was ripped out from under me, I literally had no one to turn to. I struggled for weeks, I didn't get out of bed until I had to leave for work, i cried for three weeks straight at work, nicky was leaving and it just cemented that i had no one left who knew what was going on. I got a new job. I didn't eat. I slept at stupid hours. I bombarded you with * * * * loads of bull * * * * , embarrassing and desperate text messages... This all doesn't matter anymore. It never mattered. Nothing matters but how i feel about you, and now it's too late.

 

There were and still are alternatives. I've tried hating you, I've tried blaming all of it on you, I've tried forgetting you, and even you being cruel wasn't enough to change how i feel... I have done everything and I just end up wanting something I can't have. I do hope that you're right, and in time we can talk and be friends and "go from there." *

 

But I'm tired of missing opportunities, its surprising how many guys have asked me out, probably see me as a vulnerable girl who can be used... I've turned them all down. Initially i felt guilty, the first guy * was three weeks after our spilt and I got the same exciting feelings I had with you, but it got me so upset. The ones after only wanted one thing, and I'm obviously not someone who can do that. I am going out with the first guy and I will see where it leads, I don't want to use him and I'm petrified of being seen with a "rebound," but for now, it's about getting to know new people.

 

* I can't close this door for good or at all, I don't feel comfortable (especially with the plans we made) and that's probably my weakness, because no matter how long I go on, and no matter how much you're slipping from my mind... You're still there.

 

I don't believe you when you say you have no feelings anymore, the amount of anger you had when you were yelling in my face... I choose to take that as a positive. Means I'm not alone in this. People love differently and deal with things differently, but I know you were feeling what I was last night. I think you forget that you let me in as much as i let you in. I should have never tried to kiss you either, im sorry. Having your arm around me though, it felt right. This is why I'm still in two minds, I need to move on, but parts of me don't want to.

 

And as for the two girls, who again went out of their way to make their presence known... I don't know where they fit in, but I have zero tolerance for petty bull * * * * (unless i initiate it ) No one tells me that you and I are cute after lapping up our 'fight' at the bar... and then hang off of you, after hanging off your best friend two weeks ago... That pissed me off, and if I am faced with them again I probably won't be so nice. The fact that I was accused of coming between you and Matt (but as he said, I was "friends" with him before I even knew you) and that you apparently had numerous conversations about me and that issue... And then turn around and do exactly that. Maybe her jealousy has rubbed off on to me, but so be it. It * * * * s me to tears that I don't even * * * * ing know these people but they seem to know enough about me.

 

Anyway, removing the * * * * * iness and resentment... It's time for me to stop dwelling on things and look forward. Its an everyday battle not contacting you, and I'm sorry if I have moments of weakness in the coming weeks as I try to fully comprehend moving on without you. I do hope to hear from you eventually, about how life is going genuinely and how uni is, how your sister is going etc... I really don't know what to do to move forward, this is not easy for me, but for now I think limited to no contact like the last two weeks is the only way. It kills me knowing that you were my person, I turned to you for everything big and small and now you're gone.

 

I miss you.

[markie6]

Hey, it's been 2 weeks since you contacted me, longest time since we have known each other. I didn't take my photos of you off my FB profile, I just de-activated

 

I wonder how you are every single hour of every single day but I am trying to let it go

 

Just because you don't hear from me, doesn't mean a thing and yes I do still miss you and us but I am doing what you asked and leaving you alone. Please do the same for me

[Fraggle]

So it's the weekend and i feel v lonely and exhausted for still not sleeping well. Its been 3 weeks since you confirmed in the coffee shop it was over. After such a long time together you didn't put up a fight to try had sort anything. You just told me you didn't want to have kids w me and you were moving on to find someone else. In that instant I lost my best friend (or who I thought was my best friend) my soulmate and my lover.

 

Looking back on our relationship maybe it was destined to fail? We had some really good times together but equally some difficult times too.

 

I doubt very much you will find someone who will try and care for you as much as I did but I hope you find the utopia you seek in the world. Much of you I will miss but there are other bits I will not.

 

I thank you for not contacting me and leaving breadcrumbs as that would only be harder, although given that you wanted to stay in the apartment because I was in a difficult place you no longer seem to care.

 

You also seemed reluctant to take all of your stuff w you as if it would give you an excuse to come back? Was that so you could keep an eye on me or just laziness- I'll never know.

 

The recent pain you have put me through as been awful and probably worse than you will ever fathom or care to know. I guess you will compartmentalize the last 9 years as you do everything and not bat an eyelid at moving on? I know that soon I'll be but a fleck in lifes rear view mirror. You barely have any pictures of us but I'm sure you don't care as that's not your style.

 

I'm sorry I put youbthrough some difficult times but I could not help that my father and then sister got I'll and that it took it's toll on me psychologically. But then you never knew hownto deal with that and just buried your head when I needed you most.

 

I'm not sure how end is so I shall just say goodbye....q

[ANuBeginning]

It's been three weeks since i last heard from you. I knew from those texts that would be the last time. I'm strangely indifferent right now. I'm proud that i've initiated NC and kept it for three weeks now, hasn't really been much of a struggle... strangely. I admit, i had a setback and cried in therapy but mostly because i've become so damn angry. I hope all the drama that you brought when you contacted me in December was worth it. I hope dragging me into your problems and having me relive all those painful emotions from when you first left brought you some satisfaction. As much as i tried to push you away and close the door on you and your bull, you kept on with your woe is me pity party. Welp, that was the first and last time i'll fall for that. I don't expect to hear from you until something else goes horribly wrong and even then.. i can't promise you i'll even care. You made your bed now you have to lie in it.. and i hope it swallows you alive.