Why does......

[Vince99]

I haven't laughed in a long time...but this thread is getting me pretty close.

[yeawutever]

While you DO need money to survive--money and success isn't everything, nor is it an accurate measure of the quality or character of the man.

I have a clear understand it isn't everything, at least not when it comes to terminal diseases or STD's, I know but other than that it benefit you economically in the sense that if you wanna buy something better you can and do don't have to be limited like some people are or depending on someone to give it to you.

 

As far as your boyfriend and you were happy good for you but would you still have stayed with him if in like 10 years from now he still works at the same place barely has any money?

[yeawutever]

I haven't laughed in a long time...but this thread is getting me pretty close.

Ok good for you. So what's so funny about it?

[insecurefool]

I think you need to go back and re-read Resonance Theory's post. That's the first step.

 

In some ways I want to really get at what you are trying to say, and try to agree with you. It's true that a lot of times people tend to date those with a similar level of education (e.g. someone with a bachelor's will date someone else with a bachelor's, etc) However, this doesn't always mean their incomes will be similar (although it can.)

 

I'm assuming that since you are from Peru, English is not your first language. If this is not the case then I highly suggest that you finish your BA (and not "leisurely"), and really focus on your studies. As someone with a college degree, I would find a potential partner with such poor grammar to be off-putting.

 

Just as you would find those with a lower salary to be unattractive, many educated people would not see the "sparks" with someone who apparently didn't actually learn a whole lot during their time in school (or from their other life experiences.) The piece of paper is just that, and if you do not come out of school with a stronger, more rational view on yourself and those around you, then you really aren't "educated." I think you have a long ways to go.

[chigal28]

Anyone who is 32 and only can get a job at subway is a LOSER. Sorry.

 

Customer Service is a lot better than Subway when you are 32. Even Telemarketing

 

I had a friend who worked in telemarketing for one week, and she absolutely couldn't stand it. She said she felt like she was completely wasting her time and energy, trying to cold-call people and wasting their time. At least Subway is honest work, and you are offering people a product they've sought out.

 

I think if someone is happy doing what they're doing, and it's meaningful for them, that's all that matters. You're certainly free to disagree. I'd also like to add that there are some highly competent, intelligent people working seemingly "menial" jobs, and high-earning CEOs who have no talent, got their positions through connections, and accomplish absolutely nothing in a day, week, month or year.

 

My husband is a journalist, and has barely cracked $30K. I was a journalist for 8 years, and ditto for me. Now through a slight career change I'm making $20K more. We both loved journalism, but we certainly didn't choose it for the $$$. What if one of us had fallen in love with someone who made considerably more, and married that person? Would that have made us a gold-digger?

 

I dated a guy for 4 years who was making six figures straight out of college, and now (5 years after we broke up) is earning probably close to half a million a year or more as an executive VP at his company. He was fantastic on paper--great guy, cute, funny, smart, driven, etc.--we just did not and could not get along. I could've put up and shut up, I guess....

[chigal28]

Well see if I was judge a person in real life then I would at least have a clue on what they actually do for a living and for what purpose. Those aren't loser but motivators. They are making a living for real purpose in life, real improvements.

 

The losers I was referring to are the those that like the poster StrawberryYogurt described a girl that works for 10 years or more works on a simple Walmart or those as mopper or cleaners all their lives. That, that's all they do for a living and seem satisfy with not working towards improvement. Then some expect to have life easy meeting a wealthy one to provide them their needs. In that case no I don't think no man should be a sugardaddy as no woman should be sugarmommy.

 

You think working at Wal-Mart is easy? I worked at Hardee's for my first summer job, and it was TOUGH. We had demanding managers, and we had to be tops in service and keep the place spick-and-span. I learned my work ethic at my first seemingly "menial" summer jobs, which have carried over to my career.

 

People provide for themselves and their families as best they can. I'd place a lot more emphasis on HOW someone does their job--are they enthusiastic? do they work hard? do they go above and beyond?--than WHAT their job is. I'm always impressed by excellence, whether it's a waiter, barista, doctor or business owner.

[pinkrobot]

yeawutever, I'm still awaiting a response of why you even posted this on ENA to begin with. Obviously you weren't looking for input, since you seem bent on arguing with every sensical point anyone has made; and you definitey weren't seeking advice on the matter. And as strongly as you feel you're right in this matter, I'd really like to know what prompted you to write it on here. Just out of curiosity.

[yeawutever]

I'm assuming that since you are from Peru, English is not your first language. If this is not the case then I highly suggest that you finish your BA (and not "leisurely"), and really focus on your studies. As someone with a college degree, I would find a potential partner with such poor grammar to be off-putting.

I was born in Peru but it's only been 2 years since I'm here (I left here long ago when I was 4). So my grammar is poor?? LOL, I can't write well in Spanish.

[yeawutever]

yeawutever, I'm still awaiting a response of why you even posted this on ENA to begin with. Obviously you weren't looking for input, since you seem bent on arguing with every sensical point anyone has made; and you definitey weren't seeking advice on the matter. And as strongly as you feel you're right in this matter, I'd really like to know what prompted you to write it on here. Just out of curiosity.

I believed I answered your question.

 

I was making a point why I feel about certain issue. This is the same as commenting on movies you like. What some like, others won't.

[pinkrobot]

I believed I answered your question.

 

I was making a point why I feel about certain issue. This is the same as commenting on movies you like. What some like, others won't.

 

Hmm, I just think it's interesting...

 

So is that to say that it would make sense to start a thread on ENA entitled, "Movies I like," in which you comment on them? Lol.

 

I could understand if you were having a current problem with someone that was based on your viewpoint on this issue. But just to come on here and state that, knowing it would offend some people and definitely start some arguments, that's interesting to me.

[yeawutever]

I could understand if you were having a current problem with someone that was based on your viewpoint on this issue. But just to come on here and state that, knowing it would offend some people and definitely start some arguments, that's interesting to me.

I get what you're referring to. Thoughts are yours to keep but not to spread out. I didn't think just writing it out on an anonymous forum could actually hurt people.

[Night Pumpkin]

Yeawutever,

 

I am sorry, but just admit that you are wrong, Ok.

 

There is nothing wrong with anyone working at any job. As long as it is legal, they are paying their taxes, and it isn't "immoral" work, I don't see why you should judge someone else's job. So what if they work at Subway? Who cares if they work at Walmart? I don't. Why should you?

 

If you don't want to work at Subway, then don't. If you don't want to work at Walmart, then don't. But don't look down upon other people who do. Don't say that some guys aren't good enough for you just because they have a low pay and "low"" status job. What you do for work really isn't who you are.

 

There are homeless people working collecting cans who were once war heros. There are low paid chefs who were once bankers making 6 figures. My own roommate is unemployed. But for decades, he was a paramedic who saved hundreds of lives.

 

My own girlfriend who is 29 makes just barely above minimum wage, but I love her to death.

[pinkrobot]

My own girlfriend who is 29 makes just barely above minimum wage, but I love her to death.

 

I'm so glad you said this. I tried to emphasize this in one of my earlier responses on this thread, but in her eyes it just wasn't possible.

 

What kind of person would that make Night Pumpkin if he were to tell his girlfriend, "I love you, BUT you barely make minimum wage, so I'm gonna have to break up with you." ?

[StrawberryYogurt]

I'm so glad you said this. I tried to emphasize this in one of my earlier responses on this thread, but in her eyes it just wasn't possible.

 

What kind of person would that make Night Pumpkin if he were to tell his girlfriend, "I love you, BUT you barely make minimum wage, so I'm gonna have to break up with you." ?

 

Look, it's cool for anyone to be working, but let's face reality here. If I remember Night Pumpkin correctly, he's a good guy, but he's not in the upper echelon of income and occupation so he's not going to see things the same way I do.

 

Why would I or any other person who has a good occupation,has a high income, has high net worth, and is a college graduate, be with some girl who can only work at a "lower level" job? That's just setting yourself up for being used for money. Now if that girl was working at Subway after having been in the workforce and has millions in the bank, that'd be different b/c it shows she was and is capable of something better.

 

Not to mention, I just don't have that much in common with someone who works at Subway fulltime anyway.

[StrawberryYogurt]

There are homeless people working collecting cans who were once war heros. There are low paid chefs who were once bankers making 6 figures. My own roommate is unemployed. But for decades, he was a paramedic who saved hundreds of lives.

 

Yeah, I'm sure that's the vast majority ](*,)

[pinkrobot]

Why would I or any other person who has a good occupation,has a high income, has high net worth, and is a college graduate, be with some girl who can only work at a "lower level" job? That's just setting yourself up for being used for money.

 

Now tell me, what's the difference between being "used" for money and being "loved" for money? Oh wait, there is a difference. In one case you're used for your money, yet in the other case it's kind of flip-flopped. Let me explain.

 

If you're a college grad with a high income, dating a high school grad with a lower income, you're afraid they're with you for your money.

 

However, if you're a college grad with a high income, refusing to date anyone with LESS than a college grad and a high income, you're technically dating them for their money...if you literally refuse to date someone with the same financial status as yourself, you're seeking out their money before you're ever seeking out a life partner who shares common interests with you.

[StrawberryYogurt]

However, if you're a college grad with a high income, refusing to date anyone with LESS than a college grad and a high income, you're technically dating them for their money...if you literally refuse to date someone with the same financial status as yourself, you're seeking out their money before you're ever seeking out a life partner who shares common interests with you.

 

Why would you assume I or anyone with my opinion refuses to date someone of lower income? My G/F makes half what I make, but I respect her occupation and she graduated with honors from college. But I will never date a girl below a certain floor occupation wise.

[ghost69]

this isn't fiddler on the roof.

[waveseer]

Isn't the word for the notion of "sticking with your own kind" socioeconomically bourgeois?

[hers]

Ok I have to jump in here.

 

If one doesn't want to be used for their money, they don't have to be used for their money. Sign a pre-nup, keep your finances separate. You know when your relationship fizzles out (and if you don't, then you shouldn't be trying to be in a relationship), so if you suspect that your SO is staying with you only b/c you make more money than he or she does, then leave. You don't have to stay. It's your choice. No one will force you.

 

My dad is married to a woman who uses him for his money. They don't even live in the same state but she refuses to sign divorce papers. Why? B/c she gets a free ride with him. Does he complain? More than I'd liek him to (actually, prtty much constantly). I don't feel sympathy for him though. No pre-nup, no marriage. He knows he "married beneath him" (his words) but he still thinks that if he had married her if she were financially stable, he still woudln't have been happy.

 

And who's to say that the second you get married, if you make about the same income, that one person won't stop working and you'd have to support them anyway? It's a silly argument.

 

And if you make $100K and you fall in love with a girl who works at Subway, who's to say she'd stop working at Subway just b/c she found a guy who made $100K a year? If she kept her job, if she were going to work each day to earn her own way, however meager that it is, who's to say she's a bad person?

 

Someone who works is much different from someone who wants just money. Someone making $6 an hour isn't money-hungry, obviously, so you probably wouldn't have to worry about them stealing all your money and taking off with it (and if they do, I don't have pity for you b/c you should protect your assets better than that).

 

I'm a pet sitter. I have a college education. I will pursue my graduate degree within the next few years. Guys look down on me for my job b/c they assume I'm uneducated. I don't care. I am happy with what I do. That's all that matters to me. If a guy is working as a plumber for $10 an hour while I'm self-employed, who am I to judge? If he's happy unclogging crap, more power to him. Passion goes a lot further than money.

 

You can say all day you aren't superficial, but no one will really believe you if you're passing such judgment.

 

yeawutever--you are freeloading off your parents. You're rich by association. You're no better than the person working at Subway b/c you're not really advancing either (you're "free-spiriting through college" by taking your time). But at least that person at Subway is working. You're not. You're rich b/c mommy and daddy are. You are, in a sense, using your parents for money just in the same way you look down on people who are using their SO for money. Where is your contribution?

 

And splitting up your little brother's hypothetical relationship is just awful. You yourself have a boyfriend who's judged frequently by your family and you're unhappy with that. How do you not notice the contradiction in your statement about your brother?

 

By the way, if it werent for those people working in Subway or delivering your pizza or unclogging your sewer or ringing up your groceries, the economy woudl be much worse than it is and you wouldn't have a sandwich or a sewer or any groceries to bring home.

 

Some of you need a lesson in gratitude. Stat.

[StrawberryYogurt]

I just love how most of you ignore the reality that marriages work better, generally speaking, when people have similar values and socio-economic backgrounds. It is what it is.

[hers]

I just love how most of you ignore the reality that marriages work better, generally speaking, when people have similar values and socio-economic backgrounds. It is what it is.

 

I am not ignoring it b/c I honestly don't know. I am not married. But I do know that marriage can work out also if money is not your main concern.

[ghost69]

I just love how most of you ignore the reality that marriages work better, generally speaking, when people have similar values and socio-economic backgrounds. It is what it is.

 

that's what i've always thought. hence 'clicking'. BUT, money can change those values.

[pinkrobot]

Why would you assume I or anyone with my opinion refuses to date someone of lower income?

 

Let me quote you from a previous post:

 

Why would I or any other person who has a good occupation,has a high income, has high net worth, and is a college graduate, be with some girl who can only work at a "lower level" job? That's just setting yourself up for being used for money.

 

This is why I assume you would refuse to date someone of lower income--you state, "Why would I . . . be with some girl who can only work at a 'lower level' job?" So, I'm not assuming, I'm just going off of what you stated about yourself. Not to mention you said later in that passage that it would make a difference if the "lower level" job was preceded by storing millions in the bank.

 

In that post, you made it clear you disagreed with someone of your "worth" dating someone who made quite a bit less than you.

[hers]

Let me quote you from a previous post:

 

 

 

This is why I assume you would refuse to date someone of lower income--you state, "Why would I . . . be with some girl who can only work at a 'lower level' job?" So, I'm not assuming, I'm just going off of what you stated about yourself. Not to mention you said later in that passage that it would make a difference if the "lower level" job was preceded by storing millions in the bank.

 

In that post, you made it clear you disagreed with someone of your "worth" dating someone who made quite a bit less than you.

 

Not to mention he said his own girlfriend makes significantly less than he does.