Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Me ex broke up with me about 5 months ago and just now I started NC with him.I was looking some relationship sites yesterday and I was wondering,you think is too soon for me to start to date? Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Only you know if your ready. For some people its a month after, for others its twelve. Its if you feel ready and comfortable in yourself and your sure it wont be a rebound. Link to comment
felinex Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 i've been asking myself the same question. my ex broke up with me over month ago, i understand his reasons, but of course still felt the pain and i'm still managing the pain, and it does get easier every day... thank God! anyways, yeah, i've been asking myself when its okay to date, but the thing is, the idea only comes to me whenever I feel horrible, its like a small part of me believes that the quickest way to deal with the pain is to find somebody else. but i know i'm only fooling myself because i'm not the type to date so soon after a relationship (all of my past relationships lasted more than a year)... everybody tells me that i need to do whatever i need to to make it through the day, but really its easier said than done. my ex is very special to me, i never felt that way with anyone... so i don't think i can date anyone for a long while. i know i have to deal with the pain for now, and focus on picking up the pieces and make myself whole again before i'm ready. sorry for ranting, but yeah...i think that no one really knows when, i guess once you've dealt with the breakup and feel ready then you're ready. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 If it feels wrong or weird, it usually is is my two pennies. I started dating after pretty soon after my ex and it felt fine, but for some people ti doesnt. Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 Im not over him yet but I think could help me to forget him Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 You shouldnt date just to help you forget someone, thats not fair on the next guy if their just for you to forget your ex. By all means move on, but when your emotionally ready and SURE. Link to comment
annie24 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 i think going on some casual dates can often help remind you that your ex wasn't the only man in the world. you don't have to jump straight into a relationship, but spending some time, hanging out with new men, that is a good thing. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Also Annie has a point, casual dating could be an eye opener, just dont jump straight into anything serious. Link to comment
felinex Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 going out with friends and meeting new people can really be refreshing, i agree Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 We've all been there it sucks, but you cant just jump in and hope you find a bf straight away, just test the waters, enjoy yourself and you might meet someone lovely. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 You will. Just be happy in you and know your great and you'll find someone who deserves you. Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 Thank you My ex treated me like I wasnt worth the effort,I want to find a guy that treats me good. Link to comment
felinex Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 i agree with Blue. its a good idea to focus on yourself and do whatever it is that makes you happy... read a book, watch a movie, go out with your friends... find positive, happy distractions. stay strong and get happy! Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 My ex was the same. But I found someone whose the complete opposite. There are people out there that'll value you. Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 My ex was the same. But I found someone whose the complete opposite. There are people out there that'll value you. Good you found someone that treats you better Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 I hope so What your ex did to you? If you dont mind saying of course. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Of course not! He was just unloving, verbally, sometimes physically abusive. I never even knew what healthy love was before I met my guy I have now. Moving on and learning to love ME was the best thing I ever did. Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 I see,I dont think I know what health love is too.My ex acted like if he couldnt care less for me,he said he loved me but didnt act much how somebody that loves should act in my opinion. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 i dunno if you are ready. you are really hung up on that ex. only you can decide if you are ready though. Link to comment
penelope13 Posted May 18, 2009 Share Posted May 18, 2009 I'm not sure either if you are ready yet for a new relationship (nothing wrong with casual dating though). I'm not sure if you have fully realized yet what made you stay in your last relationship for such a long time despite not getting what you wanted out of it. I'd be a bit afraid that you might transfer your expectations too soon onto another person, without having taken enough time to learn how to be comfortable with yourself, how to be confident and assertive and how to be able to realize when/ if a situation is not healthy for you Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 18, 2009 Author Share Posted May 18, 2009 Right,I think maybe I need some more time. Link to comment
Anusha Posted May 18, 2009 Author Share Posted May 18, 2009 I was thinking,maybe casual date could help me to develop my self esteem and see that are more guys out there. Link to comment
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