RitaTrue Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Day 48 It doesnt seem that long. Hopefully that's a good sign. My biggest problem is that the memories keep coming back. I wish I could find the off switch. If I could, I feel that I'd progress faster. Link to comment
RitaTrue Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 A guy I met at the grocery store 3 days ago, talked to me. He had a good attitude and sense of humor. He asked for my number, and I gave it to him. I figured wth =) But now, I'm not so sure talking to him. For whatever reason, I've thought about my ex a little more recently, and his memories seem to keep popping up. I dont want to feel like I led this guy on. I dont want anything serious, just a good time. He called me and left a text. I feel fake right now. On one hand, I want to go out. But on the other hand, I dont feel motivated to do it right now. Link to comment
mecastillo1987 Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 I'm the one at fault in the relationship. It's been 3 weeks, and he said he needs more time and more space to think about what he wants to do with me in the relationship, although he did lash out at me when I tried talking to him a week after the break-up. I went to his house, begging, crying, pleading he take me back... saying sorry for everything I've done in the relationship. He was so hurt and angry he told me he didn't deserve any of the things I did, that he was really hurt, that he was in his cave, that he realizes how sad his relationship was with me for all the times we fought. It's been Day 13 since that "time". I broke the No Contact Rule 2 days ago because there was a typhoon and I was worried-sick about him. He didn't reply. Will the No Contact Rule still work for me? Or should I just move on? Link to comment
RitaTrue Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 You use the No Contact Rule TO move on. It's not either-or. It's both-and. And yes, it can and does work for healing. You should do it. He already has. Link to comment
Sanity Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 I just have to say wow. My ex started talking to me last week. And I only talk to her when she approaches me. Her and her rebound are on the verge of breaking. This all happened so quickly. Link to comment
madine Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Back on two weeks NC. And it doesn't seem I have to deal with having to be around her for a while. I've kinda moved into a sort of 'revenge-mode'. A couple of days ago I really felt like pulling something, but I am wise enough not to do so. I guess the best way to get my revenge is just living a good life. Unfortunately I've got the flu right now, but as soon as I feel better I'm going to increase my work out time and lose those few extra pounds. And I'm going to buy me a new wardrobe. Next time she sees me at one of those political gatherings I'm going to look so good she can't keep her eyes of me. Link to comment
Dryyoureyes Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Day 11 O no, I've suddenly got the urge to contact her.. to tell her what a [insert a whole lot of very very bad words] she is. It is almost uncontrollable. I hate her guts right now. What do I do? thats what i did. depends on what you want. I honestly didn´t care anymore if she remembers me like that, because she did everything to turn my memories bad anyway (cheating, lying...the lot). I was always the nice guy, always been always will...but I still feel great (4 weeks later) about telling her, that I detest her from the bottom of my heart and whish her that karma gets her one day. At least one time, I had the guts to stand up and not be totally weak, needy etc and for me, that was soo worth it. I don´t really care if I ever hear from her again and I don´t really get, why it is important what she thinks about me in the end ....`?(in 95% of the cases you won´t hear from your ex again so...whatever floats your boat in my opinion). day 20 of NC again. I cant check her Fb anyway and kicked all her close friends too ( I am on block after that msg...and I am a bit proud for the reasons i mentioned already). Got a new Skype account as well Link to comment
Melting Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Day 4 BU 1st Sept. definitely dont have any urges to contact you. Having my good and bad days, so far the bad out weigh the good, but I know in time that will change. Just trying to be strong and put my energy elsewhere, cos you don't deserve it. Going to start going to gym soon and also organising my passport, so I can have a nice relaxing holiday. Having a goal to work for is great for confidence and occupies the mind. 1 Link to comment
Tomuch2hope Posted September 29, 2011 Share Posted September 29, 2011 Nearly cracked today. Apparently she recieved a delievery of flowers in work today. I found out when I got a text from her saying 'thanks for the flowers, there are lovely' But I didn't send any......... I'm thinking about leaving it a few days and sending a short, cool reply saying I didn't sent them. Link to comment
jeepman41 Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 A guy I met at the grocery store 3 days ago, talked to me. He had a good attitude and sense of humor. He asked for my number, and I gave it to him. I figured wth =) But now, I'm not so sure talking to him. For whatever reason, I've thought about my ex a little more recently, and his memories seem to keep popping up. I dont want to feel like I led this guy on. I dont want anything serious, just a good time. He called me and left a text. I feel fake right now. On one hand, I want to go out. But on the other hand, I dont feel motivated to do it right now. Hey Rita, it's OK to go out and have some fun. You are not being fake. Just let the person know up front that you are not looking for anything serious. That's not being fake, it's being honest. Link to comment
RitaTrue Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 Day 50. Dear Ex, Damn. Can't believe its been this long. I occupy my time at work. And lately, at the gym. That makes me feel better. I envy you sometimes. You're very outgoing, and I know you'll have hoards of girls just waiting to hop your * * * * . Whereas, I, the more introverted type, dont attract attention like that. I feel like I'm missing out somehow because I'm not partying and living it up since you've been gone. I joined a health club and did some self introspection. I can see where I contriubuted to our problems. I can see where you contributed too. Sometimes my mind still goes over the shoulda-coulda-woulda. But its pointless. And in the end, its funny, but I could intuitively sense that we were going to break up WAAAAY before you did. Months before you did. Maybe that's why none of this surprises me. None of this would be so bad, if you werent so special to me. And if I could at least erase half of your memories. No, maybe not the memories, but just what each of them mean to me. Link to comment
madine Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 I don't know. If you do that it shows you still care. If you act real cool like you don't care, wouldn't that hurt your ex more? Link to comment
Gladewalker Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 Well today marks day 3 of no contact, it has been once again another interesting day thus far. At first I really felt strong today, happy to be moving forward and doing this, but over the past hour those feelings have turned into a strong feeling of anger towards my ex. How she could already be with someone a month after our relationship baffles me still, and I just wonder what she was thinking jumping right into it. I don't think they will last now that I'm gone, and I know I should not worry about it, and that I have no control over it. It is very hard not talking to someone who you consider your best friend, we get along so well when we hang out it's hard to be apart, but I know it is for the best for both of us to move forward with whatever it is that we end up deciding to do. Link to comment
Melting Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 Day 5... Feeling good, im free Link to comment
madine Posted September 30, 2011 Share Posted September 30, 2011 Well, four months ago at this day and time I was being dumped. I am a long way from being healed.... Link to comment
Melting Posted October 1, 2011 Share Posted October 1, 2011 Day 6 again.... just need to get past Day 8 and then I will be on a new record. Link to comment
Dryyoureyes Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 well it wasnt about hurting her...it was more about saying everything i wanted to say. Otherwise I would have gotten stuck with the feeling, that i was just a weak.... and that she was able to do everything she wanted with me. Now I made my point clear and for me at least, i feel great with it. I haven´t actually felt that good in 5 months time since the BU. It was the valve for letting go my anger and letting go of the past. I don´t wanna be friends with her anyway, I honestly don´t really care and I am more than sure... for her it´s exactly the same. Link to comment
jolbell69 Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 BU 3rd July 9 weeks NIC and LC 21 days NC Is it supposed to get easier?? I have been really down the last couple of days, and can't get my ex and our relationship out of my head. I am sure I am doing the right thing with NC, but I admit I'm disappointed that he hasn't tried to contact me, or one of my friends - to see how I am. I miss him so much, and really continue to hope that we can get back together one day. You see - I know he loves me, I know he doesn't want anyone else - it was his circumstances that led to him breaking up with me. Am I stupid to hope??? I spoke to one of my closest friends, (male) and he told me that I should give up and move on. He thinks that there is no chance we can get back together, and he doesn't want me to wait. His comments made me feel much worse - I appreciate his honesty, but he doesn't know my ex very well, so how can he be so sure? PLEASE eNA friends - what do you all think???? Link to comment
mecastillo1987 Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 BU: Sept 8 NC: Sept 20 Broke the NC rule, because it was his birthday yesterday. Being the dumpee and the one at fault in the relationship, I wanted to do something to help remind him of how much I cared for and loved him -- even though we were no longer together. I stopped by his house and left him a present I knew for certain he would like. I made sure he wasn't home, so he was getting all the "space" he wanted and needed. This afternoon, I got an e-card from him saying "Thank you for your gift. I appreciate your thoughtfulness." It had the flash animation of an elephant repeatedly giving hugs with the words 'Thank you! You made my day very special!'. Will continue the NC rule, despite mixed feelings. Link to comment
Mellie Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 @OhSunny. Well you are in this forum and it would seem you want to get back together with him. Unfortunately, I do not know 'your story', but from my own personal experience (many breakups) we NEVER addressed why we broke up. Just kept hitting the reset button you know? And what is the definition of insanity? I think you should ask him what you just asked us. I agree completely. Link to comment
Melting Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 BU Sept 1st.. Day 7 again. I am getting out in the real world, but still in my mind taking him with me. I am finding that a little hard, but I am being strong with the NC. He broke me and now I need to heal. Its a shame I still think of him constantly throughout the day, but the saddness has gone. Think I am going through the acceptance stage now. Link to comment
unkown1921 Posted October 3, 2011 Share Posted October 3, 2011 BU:sep 14 NC:sep 24 Its been a week of nc pretty much because she said she never wanted to see me again, she pretty much left me for another guy(wont have to worry about her contacting me anytime soon), still hear from her family though (they freakin love me and still want to see me) its still hard to not think about her but i just gotta keep moving on and bettering myself. been walking alot to take my mind off things. Link to comment
NICEMAN99 Posted October 3, 2011 Share Posted October 3, 2011 i take the challenge niceman99 split up june 18 2011 have been doing everything wrong for the past 3 months started no contact yesterday today she contacted me for kids (how long will they stay with each other)answer text messages but now ill go for no contact starting today Link to comment
Hastyhand Posted October 3, 2011 Share Posted October 3, 2011 Dude! NC is not for people who have kids! Certainly not! Link to comment
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