THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[bitebenot]

round 2 day 5

 

feels longer and jus confused as to whats happening...are we split? is he jus taking time away from me?

 

when i did nc i said what i was doing

 

but this....this is really strange. i have the feeling that maybe in few weeks he will ask what im doing and say he thought i ended it...well if he does i wont be taking the responsibilty for that, ah na

 

so i am taking this as over anyway....ive reached out a cpl of times and they have been ignored. love ya lee but love me more

 

Just wait a litle longer,im sure he will get into contact.Hes probably testing you to see how far you can take it.Dont move till he does first.

[1guygirl]

Just wait a litle longer,im sure he will get into contact.Hes probably testing you to see how far you can take it.Dont move till he does first.

 

thanks bite

 

im online and hes either ignoring me or not at his lappy...im givin it 20 mins then i'll go off. was gunna send msg but i stop - think theres summit in that

 

edit: ok nothing, nadda...this isnt bout getting back with him now this is about getting over and onwards....

[syxx87]

Day 29

 

I've been pretty upbeat today! I've thought about her a lot today but it hasnt been anything negative or bitter like last week was. Its' been mainly nostalgic and thinking about all of our "first times" we shared with each other (luckily it hasnt put me in a funk either). I'm just trying not to let it build false hope and am trying to keep in mind that she may come back or she may not, but that I will be fine either way. I'm going on a date tonight with a girl I've been talking to for a few weeks now so that has been a plus. I also found an old friend from years ago on FB last night and we chatted literally for hours about basically everything. I'm suppose to go clubbing with her and her cousin on Friday (as friends so I'm looking forward to that as well.

[1guygirl]

all sounds good and positive....have a shimmee for me

[syxx87]

all sounds good and positive....have a shimmee for me

 

lol thanks! Will do

[1guygirl]

sod it...i had to get closure on this so i sent him...

 

lee..

 

i jus want to say that i truly loved you, that is all....

 

i dont want any response, you jus take that with you, find happiness (which you will) and i will go and work on me

 

guess they call this closure and/or letting go in love....yeah i can do that... *lovin that feelin of being able to tbf*

 

 

Wildhorse

 

 

..............time to move on now.........thanks guys for jus being here on ENA

 

we're in this together and our exes jus lost out - jus maybe anyways

 

im done, feel liberated yet gutted naturally

[mwh67]

Day 30. another difficult day...2 in a row...kinda strange. one of our mutual friends asked me today about her and kept asking why i havent contacted her and stuff and i told her why would i do that? nothing would get accomplished. but she kept asking a bunch of questions. thankfully i still didnt contact the ex. it was tough...luckily right as i was about to break and call her it was time to go to work and we got so busy that i forgot about it for a while...i have to keep telling myself that calling her is the worst idea in the world.

[bitebenot]

Day 30. another difficult day...2 in a row...kinda strange. one of our mutual friends asked me today about her and kept asking why i havent contacted her and stuff and i told her why would i do that? nothing would get accomplished. but she kept asking a bunch of questions. thankfully i still didnt contact the ex. it was tough...luckily right as i was about to break and call her it was time to go to work and we got so busy that i forgot about it for a while...i have to keep telling myself that calling her is the worst idea in the world.

 

I think your friend is reporting to your ex...thats ok,it means the ex wants to know ! Whatever you do,dont call ! Be patient and wait to see what happens.

[bitebenot]

sod it...i had to get closure on this so i sent him...

 

lee..

 

i jus want to say that i truly loved you, that is all....

 

i dont want any response, you jus take that with you, find happiness (which you will) and i will go and work on me

 

guess they call this closure and/or letting go in love....yeah i can do that... *lovin that feelin of being able to tbf*

 

 

Wildhorse

 

 

..............time to move on now.........thanks guys for jus being here on ENA

 

we're in this together and our exes jus lost out - jus maybe anyways

 

im done, feel liberated yet gutted naturally

 

What if he starts chasing you ? What will you do ? Are you shutting all the doors ? If you still want him back,you surely cant communicate with him any longer,it will be NC full time.

[vertigoxo]

Day 153...

 

fhejfhlekjflelkerljerlgk

 

Will be posting thread now about how I feel tonight.

 

 

[bitebenot]

Day 153...

 

fhejfhlekjflelkerljerlgk

 

Will be posting thread now about how I feel tonight.

 

 

 

lol...great post

[FoundYet]

Into Day 15.

 

Feels like I'm stuck. Not moving forward but neither falling back, just stagnant. arrg and sigh.

Is this a good or bad thing?

[kvb10]

day 3...

 

doing okay today!

[1guygirl]

What if he starts chasing you ? What will you do ? Are you shutting all the doors ? If you still want him back,you surely cant communicate with him any longer,it will be NC full time.

 

I am not thinkin about what he does, whether or not he chases me, or do i want him back...i jus want to take time out and get me back, heal, and really work on me. I wanna move house, I want to put my pole up and I am gunna go fight for my daughter. They are my priorities now as much as i love this guy *sigh*

 

but I see it as day 1 NC again. this time im not in limbo

[DazB]

I haven't kept track of how many days into NC I am now...but anyways I had to break it at one point because we own a house together and she needs to send me some letters to sign so I had to send her my new address. I kept it friendly and to the point. I didn't ask any lead on questions, so all is good.

 

So far since the break up I have got in contact with all my friends and have been invited out to places etc, joined the gym and have an interview for a new job lined up. I have arranged some councilling and have got myself some self help book - mainly on Self Esteem.

 

I often feel like crap but I just have to wait for them moments to pass.

 

Do I want my Ex back - yes, I think so. So here we go:

 

''Claire I love you and I wish you happiness in your life''

 

There we go, I said it.

 

I'm off for breaky.

[klafeoj]

Four weeks today. Two since she last tried to contact me. I wonder every day if she really will "give up forever" in her words. It's weird i find all this week my thoughts are focusing more towards here than before. My dreams are now entirely consumed by her...seems like a backwards step. I had to take more aggressive action on removing her from my conscious life. I kept noticing when i was on fb on mutual friends sites that her profile picture kept changing always pictures of her and her new squeeze together. Every time it changed it tore me up more. So i had to make it so i couldn't get to mutual friends pages either. Anybody ever get that terminally single feeling? ah anyway 3 more days till the big 30. Will post then.

[anon12]

Anybody ever get that terminally single feeling?

 

Got that too! doing my head in.

 

2 weeks today, since the second time she came back, and left again.

 

got a text message on the 28th, askin about the flat. Hasnt been in contact since. I dont think she will be again to be honest.

 

I still dont understand her at all. Shes ruining what she built up with me, i helped her sort out college, and she was doing really well. Now shes failed her last test, on her final behaviour warning. And says "whys my life so * * * * ?"

 

Well it never bloody used to be! Figure it out...

 

rant over.

[bitebenot]

Got that too! doing my head in.

 

2 weeks today, since the second time she came back, and left again.

 

got a text message on the 28th, askin about the flat. Hasnt been in contact since. I dont think she will be again to be honest.

 

I still dont understand her at all. Shes ruining what she built up with me, i helped her sort out college, and she was doing really well. Now shes failed her last test, on her final behaviour warning. And says "whys my life so * * * * ?"

 

Well it never bloody used to be! Figure it out...

 

rant over.

You would understand her only if you studied biology !

[bitebenot]

Into Day 15.

 

Feels like I'm stuck. Not moving forward but neither falling back, just stagnant. arrg and sigh.

Is this a good or bad thing?

 

At 2 weeks is completely normal.Just hold on a litle more.The first two months are really tough.

[bitebenot]

Well its been 4 months today ! 3 months and a week of total NC.Feeling better all the time,dont think about her as much.No more dreams or "if" in my mind.Shes gone for good and she will become just a memory of the past.Moving on is the way to go,i wouldnt be at that stage if i kepted chasing her.Now i can listen to music whitout being sad.Not to be in contact with my ex is like getting rid of a virus.It would the best for her to never communicate with me because i would give her the third degree.

[syxx87]

Day 30

 

I'VE DONE IT!!!!!!!!!!! 30 DAYS OF NO CONTACT WITH MY EX!

 

But I feel so terrible today! I should be proud of my feat yet, instead I am feeling horrible. I woke up this morning because I had a dream that she came back and I was so excited until I woke up and realized it was all a dream. I was doing good all day until I really stopped and realized that it has been one month since we talked. She has only attempted to contact me once and that was on FB a week into NC and I ignored it since it wasnt anything but her telling me she was proud of me for something I did. But besides that, she hasnt reached out to me at all. She tried to talk to my best friend about the situation a few weeks ago and sent my mom and grandma a message last week saying she missed them but nothing to me at all.

 

It hurts because it appears as if she has just moved on so easily and quickly. She appears to be so happy and enjoying life so much with the guy she left me for while I'm here in pain and lonely. The last thing she said to me a month ago was that she loved me while crying! It seems now as if that was all just talk. I told her that we cant talk or hangout while she is with him and that was almost five weeks ago so with each day that passes and I dont hear from her, its obvious what her preference is. It feels as if she is never coming back and it sucks because what I had with her was so special. I plan to continue NC since I'm obviously still not 100% healed and because she is still dating the guy she left me for. I dont know when me and her will talk again or if we ever will but I just want all this pain that I'm enduring to go away.

 

Rant over

[bitebenot]

Hey.hey ! Its not over yet.You dont know if she gave up on you ! Let time show her that her novelty aint better than you ! That will usually take a few months.Let her new bf remove his mask and she will see the true him.Right now she is still comparing him to you.Give him time to mess up a litle.If your relationship whas good, you still have a fair chance.One month aint much in those situations.The average is 3 to 5 months.But just dont stand still and wait for her. OK ?

[1guygirl]

Now i can listen to music whitout being sad

 

think that is the greatest thing, listening to music without their memory or a feeling of loss hitting you...that beats the 3+ months timeframe *nice 1 btw*

 

syxx congrats or comiserations...you have reached a milestone and should look at the nearest mirror to see what strength looks like but yep i would take the slant of a month without speaking and not be best pleased about it, but i can tell you now that feeling will pass

 

anyways...ive jus done a workout and my legs are like jelly from all the squats with dumbells argh but in a good way!!!!

[mwh67]

Day 31. I worked and i slept all day haha. Lazy day today but I only thought about her a little bit so it was a big improvement over the last 2 days from hell.

[syxx87]

Hey.hey ! Its not over yet.You dont know if she gave up on you ! Let time show her that her novelty aint better than you ! That will usually take a few months.Let her new bf remove his mask and she will see the true him.Right now she is still comparing him to you.Give him time to mess up a litle.If your relationship whas good, you still have a fair chance.One month aint much in those situations.The average is 3 to 5 months.But just dont stand still and wait for her. OK ?

 

think that is the greatest thing, listening to music without their memory or a feeling of loss hitting you...that beats the 3+ months timeframe *nice 1 btw*

 

syxx congrats or comiserations...you have reached a milestone and should look at the nearest mirror to see what strength looks like but yep i would take the slant of a month without speaking and not be best pleased about it, but i can tell you now that feeling will pass

 

anyways...ive jus done a workout and my legs are like jelly from all the squats with dumbells argh but in a good way!!!!

 

Bitebenot and 1 guy girl, thank you! Its been a rough day but your words are very encouraging. I'm trying to stay strong through this and people like you on this site have helped me out a lot over the past two months or