shellie12345

Thank you guys so much! I have never heard such good advice before. I will truly listen to what you guys have told me. I think I can be happy even if I have to pretend sometimes. Some days I feel fine like when I have all my friends around me and I am not thinking about it, it really comes and goes though. But when I feel o.k I know that deep down inside things will end up fine. I can't thank you all enough though you were such big helps! I am going out tonight and I know he will be there but your advise will help me through the night! Thanks shellie

Hey Lucky, I am just in the middle of a breakup myself, however my situation is a lot different than yours is. From what I have read from you I can tell that you really love this girl. But you need to realize that although you love her and hold her above everyone else she is not doing the same for you. Yes she calls you before she goes to bed but I get the feeling that she is holding on to you when she shold be letting you move on--if she truly cared for you she would want you to be happy aswell. Having you around must be a comforting thing for her because she is with her ex and knows that if that does not work out you would be there in a second. If she is not willing to let you be happy then she is not worth all this heartache. I think that what she is doing is selfish. If she wants to be with her ex then fine, but she should not be breaking your heart at the same time. You seem like such a nice guy I don't know any guy who would put up with what you have for that long, Iam sure if you move on she will realize what she is missing and want you back and if she does not then that is truly her loss. You are worth more than that, trust me tons of girls out there are looking for a sweet guy like you!

Thank you all so much for the advice. I have all my friends to talk to but none of them have ever been through anything close to this. I agree with everything you all have told me but I just thought I would ask a few more things. I truly believe that if something is meant to be it will be and that is helping me a lot to get through this. I know that I need to let him go and if he was meant for me he will eventually be with me again. I am just having so much trouble dealing with seeing him all the time. And when we are out at bars and I see him talking to other girls it makes me so upset. I was never the jealous type and it frustrates me so much but I just can't ignore my feelings. I try to hide it but inside it is killing me. How do I deal with him being around? And when will the hurting stop?

Please help---I can't deal I posted a message a few days ago and had some great advice given to me. however, I am afraind that I am in need of some more I will explain my situation again. I am in love with the guy I have dated for almost 4 years. We were eachothers first loves and best friends. However, when we entered University our first year we began fighting and decided to break up. I wanted to get back together and for almost a year he kept telling me he did not know. I waited out of love for him and he decided that he wanted to try again. However, after a couple of months of seeing eachother he decided that he could not love me the same anymore. I am finding this so hard to deal with because I know that we can be so good together. We know all of the mistakes we made in the past and if we both wanted to it could be perfect. I know I cannot force him and I can't show him what it would be like unless he opens his heart and lets me. So I am trying to accept the fact that we are not together but for the first time it is actually real. It is so hard because he is my best friend and we talked everyday. We belong to the same group of friends and I see him everytime we go out. Also he goes to the same University as me so I see him all the time. I want to be with him so badly but it kills me to see him. I am so hurt that he would let me go after all I have done for him and after all that I know I can give him if he would let me. I just don't know how to deal with this. I am losing my lover, best friend, and a life that i loved so much. I am so scared that he will start dating someone else when I still feel this way, I don't know how I could handle that. I am also scared that if I try to date again I will never find someone that I like as much as him. How do I deal???

I just want you to know that I know exactly how you feel. I am going through almost the same thing I want to be with my ex, we are intimate a lot of the time but he does not want to be my boyfriend. I know it must make you feel really hurt to be able to be that close to him yet not get a true commitment in return. I have tried pouring my heart out aswell but if he knows that he can come to you when he needs someone, and he knows that you and him will still be intimate he is probably in no real rush to commit. All I am saying is that you are worth more than that and if he does not want to commit to you then you need to realize that you two are after different things. I know you are attracted to him and must love so many things about him but you are hurting yourself in the long run and you need to find exactly what is right for you. If you have tried dating and feel hopeless don't worry, things happen when you least expect them if your Mr right is out there he will find you. Hope I helped!

I can't move on..please help! I dated this guy for over 3 years. He was my first boyfriend and I was his first girlfriend. We were best friends and spent everyday together. In our first year of University we decided to break up. We were fighting and needed space from eachother as we attended the same University and saw eachother everyday. We stayed close and after a couple of months I told him I wanted to get back together. He kept telling me that he did not know and he needed time. After waiting for months and going through hell not knowing what was going to happen he told me no. A month or so later I was starting to move on and becoming happier. He then told me that he wanted to try again. So I dropped everything at the chance to show him how happy we could be. After months of "trying" he kept saying that he could not love me like he used to. My self-esteem has dropped so much I feel worthless because the guy who used to love me more than anything in the world cannot anymore. I can't let myself give up though. I almost wish he would do something horrible to me so that I do not want anything to do with him. But all I can do is sit around wondering if he is looking at me the same. I feel so pathetic but I can't let him go. I love him so much. How can I move on when my heart feels the same?