FatFeline

Hello, Well the girl that used to consider us "best friends, but more", has started her Junior year at college, and I havent seen her in 2 weeks, although she still calls me and we have ketp in contact. After we spent everyday together this summer, I knew this was going to happen, but it's been a little harder to deal with than I had originally thought. Well, yesterday, I told her on-line that I missed her, and missed spending time with her. She says that with school and work starting, and with seeing old friends, and meeting new friends, that she hasn't had any time to see me. I told her that I understand, but that I still miss her. Her mom even asked her about it, and she said that it wasnt an excuse, that she really has been busy. My question to you all is, is it time for me to let her go, and see what happens? And will letting go accomplish anything? Any stories similar to this and any successes would be nice to read, thank you

Attention Women...Have you or anyone you know, ever had a guy in your life that you considered to be just a friend , and thats all you wanted, but he wanted to be more? You and this guy are very close friends, do almost everything together, and so on, but you just didnt want anything more with him or anyone else at the time. And you found that after time, of being close friends , that feelings started to develope...and if so, what did the guy do , or is all determined by the woman? Please tell me any positive stories, and give any advice to me if you have any...Thank you all

Hello all...Stepping back from her is what Ive tried to do, by not being on-line or not answering the phone every time. I even went so far as to tell her that if we are meant to be friends only, that I needed to step back away from her for a while until my feelings fade enough where I can be "just friends". she doesnt seem to want to let that happen, she says she still wants to hang out with me as much as always, etc.... My question to you all is, does a woman ever develope feeelings for someone after that had said all along that they didnt have them? Im not saying that I am holding out hope that this will happen, because I will step back, but maybe it would provide just a little comfort , if anyone knows of this actually happening...

Ok, here is part of the IM she sent me last night: "...i dont know what else to say except that your away messages have been rediculous and now i feel like a total bi*ch and like i hurt u which is not what i wanted to do thats one of the reasons y i told u i didnt want to have a relationship because u were hurt in the past and i dont know what i want and so i dont want to hurt u......i guess thats y i never wanted to be intimate with u because those arent what my feelings are and im sorry but now i feel exactly how i didnt want to feel and it sucks i dont know what u want from me or what u want to happen but my feelings about us are the same and im sorry thats just how they are..." My only choice now is to walk away, it hurts and it will be very hard, because I love every minute with her.....any comments?

Well, here is where it stands as of now....she has given me no other choice but to walk away....and see if that wakes her up at all...EVERYBODY thinks she is making a big mistake, but Im tired of being sooooo damn nice to her and having us do all these nice things together, only to have nothing to show for it.....

Thank you all for your replies...Another note to add, regarding what one of you wrote about waiting for her to make the call, well....EVERY time we talk either on the phone or on the computer, its is her that makes the 1st contact..EVERYTIME...not me.... Last night this girl told her mom that she just doesnt want to be in a relationship with anyone right now. I know that someday she will want to be with me, how do I do that?

I have been "hanging out" with this girl since July 4th, and its been great. We both admit to having strong feelings for each other, but after every date, its a stretch to even get a kiss out of her, she is afraid of something. Well, this past weekend, her cousin came to visit her, and they talked about us. Her cousin tells me this: She doesnt wanna get into a relationship with me for 2 reasons 1) She doesnt want something to go wrong and then lose my friendship too 2) She doesnt wanna start one, because she thinks I will ask her to marry me too soon Im at the end of my rope, and Im ready to walk away, but I dont want to What can i do? DO I continue to wait it out and see what happens? We do everything together that a couple does. And her entire family and all her friends cant understand why she wont give us a chance. Im not looking for marriage, all I want is for her to open up a little to me

Hello, I've been "hanging out" with this girl for over a month now, and it's been great. I enjoy EVERY minute with her. We enjoy each other's company very much, and although we are "just friends", I have met her parents 2 times, and her best friends 2 times, and they all love me....she has met only my Dad so far, and he loved her.....We do alot of things together, dinner, movies, clubs, concerts, drives, or go out on my boat....after each time , we end our night with a hug and an "I'll call ya tomorrow". Which is fine, but not kissing this girl is killing me!!!! We kissed early on in our relationship, and since she told me she just wanted to be friends for now, we only hug and flirt. The other night while we were out , she put MY arm around her 3 times....her friends all think she likes me, by the way she is around me, but they can't figure out what is holding her back...My guess is she thinks I will hurt her, I have NOOOOO plans on that!! Someone please tell me what ya think...is she just being careful to not get hurt? or is she playing hard to get,?

Hello all, Thanks to this site and your posts, I was able to get over the Ex GF...now I have met someone else that I really like...however, I have a small problem with it so far, and I need all of your advice!! This girl and I have been "hanging out" for almost a month now, and it's been great, I really like her alot, and she says that she likes me, but not the way I like her...we have gotten intimately close on one occasion, and I hope to do that more often. She says she doesnt want a BF, and I told her I dont want a GF, but I do want more affection from her, and dont wanna feel like I can't lean forward and kiss her. She said , that may not be a good idea right now, even though we already have, and with passion. We've been hanging out alot lately, and it seems as though a huhg is all I can get...I wanna kiss her in the worst way, but it just doesnt happen. She also makes comments about me being used to women falling at my feet, and that she isnt like that. So , we go from being physical to basically , just hugging...My question to you all is, how do I go about spending time with this girl , and hoping it developes into something more?? To the females, my question to you is, do women ever say what she is saying, to protect themselves, and to also play the role of hard to get? Please respond...thank you all

Hello all, Thanks to this site and your posts, I was able to get over the Ex GF...now I have met someone else that I really like...however, I have a small problem with it so far, and I need all of your advice!! This girl and I have been "hanging out" for almost a month now, and it's been great, I really like her alot, and she says that she likes me, but not the way I like her...we have gotten close on one occasion, and I hope to do that more often. She says she doesnt want a BF, and I told her I dont want a GF, but I do want more affection from her, and dont wanna feel like I cant lean forward and kiss her. She said , that may not be a good idea right now, even though we already have, and with passion. My question to you all is, how do I go about spending time with this girl , and hoping it developes into something more?? To the females, my question to you is, do women ever say what she is saying, to protect themselves, and to also play the role of hard to get? Please respond...thank you all

Well, me and me my Ex GF got back together on Christmas Eve, and up until 2 weeks ago, it was great!!! We had been together for about 7 months before she moved out last June. We both agreed that we still love each other and that no one else could take our place in our hearts. She was openly announcing her plans to marry me and ws inviting people to the big day and everything!!! Well, 2 weeks ago she decides that she isnt ready to marry, she is only 20...and I agree!!! I am 15 years older and she thinks that I want to get married right away, which isnt true. I told her I just want us to be together and to be happy. The last week or so, she has been kind of distant with me, and Im starting to see the signs that she gave when she first broek up with me and moved out. So we talked yesterday....she said that she knows she has pushed me away recently, she needs to get her life straightened out and earn the money that she needs to , to take care of bills. She says she still loves me and doesnt want anyone else, that she still wants to be with me, but that she is still having a hard time getting over our age difference. She said it never really bothered her that much, but it does now, and she says she will just have to learn to get over it. My question to you all is, am I being too cautious, and reading too much into this, having been hurt by her before? Or should I just back off her a little bit and let her figure things out? I know that this is a phase that she is going thru and will go thru, and I told her yesterday that I dont wanna lose her again due to a lack of communication like the the last time. What do I do??? Thank you all....

You are so right!! My fear with her is that I will open myself up and she will hurt me again, so I guess this time around, I am being over protective. It has to mean something that after almost 6 months of being apart, and all the games, that we still have feelings for each other, right? As far as me putting my life on "hold", I am not, I am seeing a few women that , yes, satisfy my physical needs, but the fact is, I think of her the moment I get alone again. The people that I have confided in this whole time, say that she just needs a little more time and she will evenutally come back. Again, me, being new at this, does thtis actually happen?

Thanks for your response....part of the story that was left out was, my fear of her seeing another"friend". She has the tendency to do this, as she is afraid of being alone. I'm so new at this break-ups to make-ups game, so someone please tell me, is it possible that she does want to be with me, and is just afraid to committ right now in her life. That she wants me to be there when she is ready....does this happen? She alwasy maeks comments about people that I may be seeing, like she wants to be sure that I'm not with anyone....

Well, after not speaking to the EX for a month, she began calling me again around Thanksgiving. It was that day last year that we offically began our relationship. Well, we spoke on the phone, and it went well...she said she thought of me that day, and it wouldve been a year, the usual small talk. It was loud where I was so I asked her to call me later and she did. We had a good talk, she tells me she can't figure me out, she doesnt understand why I go periods without talking to her. It's only because she started to see someone after begging me for a second chance back in October. Well, anyway, on the phone Saturday, she says that if we do get back together, that it will be final, no games, no dating, just back together and that's it. She even mentioned marriage, which we had talked about before. In October, we rushed right into to being physical, and I got burned... this time , when I saw her, I was distant, I wouldnt flirt with her, I wouldn't sit close to her when we had lunch, and she sensed it. She asked what was wrong, I told her I wasn't going to get close this time until she agreed it was what we both wanted.. She said she loves me and cares for me but is confused. I replied that it says something that after all this time and all the games, we still feel this way for each other, she agreed. My question to you all is, do I give me her more time to sort things out? I am moving on, but I know that the holiday's may be tough for both of us....Please advise...Thank you...

My GF of 6 months and I broke up in June. In August after a week long period of talking, we stopped talking for 6 weeks. Last week, she came crying back to me, beggin for a second chance...so we hung out for 4 days, and it was magic!!! But the next week, she started to sound out a different tune....she wants to be 20 and find herself before she can be with me again. I am 35, just so you know...Well, when she called me for a second chance, she had just moved out on her "rebound", and the next night she was in my bed...Well, she tells me on Saturday how much she loves me and I say the same, but she says she doesnt wanna be with me right n ow. I then find out that she is apparently seeing some new guy...so I called her and told her I wanted nothing to do with her, and for her to stop calling me. I feel empty, because there is a ton of love between us, but she is younger and has to do this...what can i do to let her know what I do understand and that maybe I will be here when she is ready??