BigSurge

I have decided to take exactly 2 years off of actively trying to find love starting on the first of '07. I will spend this time improving myself, finding out who I am and what I really want out of life. You think you know that kind of stuff until you take a step back and look at the big picture that is you. I will also spend this time bringing my body to a place where I feel comfortable with myself and socializing with others. A persons body is a temple in which they pray to God, and I feel like right now the condition of that temple is in disgraceful shape. I will not actively discourage love. If it finds me it finds me. I must become the best me I can before I can expect anyone to love me for who I am.

Sometimes hopeless causes are the best causes. Even if you feel you will never find a special person to share your life with doesn't mean it's not going to happen. You fight on because you know that if you don't all you are is a coward, and this world does not take kindly to cowards.

I don't think I'm the only shy guy this has happened to. Okay, so, you meet a girl, probably through mutual friends. You feel immediately attracted to her, but, of course, you say nothing because you're just too shy. Over time you become good friends, and the opportunity to become anything more has passed as she has assumed you are not interested. She begins to confide in you all those little personal details and problems she feels she can't tell anyone else. So now you're in the friendzone. Of course, this show of trust and emotional openness only deepens your romantic feelings for her, but you know it's too late because most girls wouldn't want someone they are dating to now how vulnerable they really feel. Do you think it's possible for a guy to have a deep emotional connection with a girl without having a romantic one? I know for me those connections always come hand in hand, I'm just curious about other people. I would guess its easier for girls to have emotional connections with no romantic feelings.

I made the monumental decision to accept Christ as my personal savior. I was confused about it until I looked at the television which I could have sworn was off only a few minutes before. On it was a televangelist named Joel Osmend on (he's the nice one who talks about why we should love each other rather than why we should hate so-and-so) he looked straight into the camera and said "If you're not sure about becoming a christian, it's not hard. All you have to do is sit down and say in a prayer 'I accept you Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour and I repent my sins' then all you have to do is join a good bible based church, and your life as a child of God begins." So I did it, and a huge weight was lifted from me. I feel so much better now, and I don't expect to change too much but I am starting to see things in a different light. Thank you for all your posts. God Bless you all.

I'm not sure if religious posts are allowed, so please forgive me if they are not. okay, so I was recently surfing the net, looking for stuff to put on my myspace, when I ran into some quotes about love, after looking at a few, I read one by St. John Of The Cross saying: "And I saw a river over which every soul must pass to reach the kingdom of heaven and the name of that river was "suffering". And then I saw a boat which carries souls accross the river and the name of that boat was "love."" And I was truly moved. I got the feeling that I was on to something big. I found more religious quotes and I kept feeling moved. I finally got to a page where there were quotes by Jesus and after reading a few I realized there was something on my face, I reached up and touched my face and realized that I was crying. I had been literally moved to tears by the words of Christ. Now I have never been a particularly religious person. Never put much thought into it until now but now I wonder, Is God trying to tell me that it has come time for me to accept Him and His Son into my life?

I guess I'm the male equivalent of those girls who always get back together with someone who treats them like crap

There's this girl that I've been dating on again, off again for a couple of years now. We've already gotten together/broken up three times! every time it was her decision to break up, then we won't see each other for a few months, Then we will meet up to be "friends" which always leads to us jumping into bed and getting back together. The thing is, the relationship only lasted while she had nothing else to do. We were together during summer vacation last year, then she dumped me. After that it was spring break, again she dumped me. Then we were together during the last summer vacation, then I was once again dumped. Now it's near Christmas time and she's wanting to start "talking" again. Are you starting to see a pattern? Whenever we are near the end of a relationship, we start fighting like crazy over tiny, unimportant issues, (mostly brought up by her) Which she uses as an excuse to dump me. By the Way, the sex between us is MIND BLOWING(not bragging, really). I've always been interested in a long term relationship with her(she's the one who always ended things). Should I talk to her and hope things turn out different? Or should I expect more of the same?

Never feel like someone is too good for you. always keep in mind that they are just a person like you you, with all the same fears and insecurities. It's all about confidence.

Morbid funny? I so get what you're saying. There are more people with that kind of sense of humor than you think. Sarcasm is a defense mechanism a lot of people (including myself) use to hide their true feelings about things. As for randomness, you really can't help that. Weird stuff just comes out of your mouth or your body impulsively makes you do stuff. I don't know about you, but a lot of times I get the urge to just dance. Weird huh? Anywhoooo... Don't give up. Loneliness is a constant part of life, and never really goes away completely. I know it sounds depressing, but no matter how many people you date, or how deeply you fall in love, there will always be a part of your mind thats just you and no one else can reach that or be a part of it. That being said, I could spew a bunch of cliches like "Just stop looking, love will find you" or "It all works out the way its meant to", But I don't believe in fate, so you gotta do stuff yourself. How about trying to ask guys out? Most guys would be extremely flattered that a girl found him attractive enough to take the initiative. Good Luck!

First off, I love this site. Absolutely great people make a website like this a pleasure to be a part of. Okay, I am a quiet guy. Extremely quiet. Sorta like Silent Bob from the Kevin Smith movies. I say very little, and everything I do say is carefully thought out. Now to some people I seem like I'm cold and distant, but I see everything going on around me and I empathize with people. I'm the guy everyone either calls "thoughtful and deep" by people who know me or "creepy and too quiet" by people who don't. I have very few real friends, and they always look to me for advice and a shoulder to lean on. I've asked my friends to write down what they think of me. One of my friends who is a girl wrote "The warmest, nicest, guy I've ever met who would do anything to make his friends happy. Although... he seems profoundly lonely and tends to forget about what he needs." Also It's hard for me to meet girls because I just can't seem to get my mouth open. All the "what ifs" just kill me. So, what do you think?

I'm only 18 and have only had one serious girlfriend so I'm not too experienced in the whole relationship and dating scene. I have been on a couple of dates with different girls but I realized recently that I hate dating. I am much happier in a serious monogamous relationship with someone I love than dating around. I know I may be too young to be saying this, but I really just want to find THE ONE. and have a happy life with that one special girl. I know it's cliche and corny, but all I've ever wanted was a special someone, a nice house in the suburbs, and some kids. I think I have the mental age of a 40 year old. My only problem is finding a girl my age interested in that kind of commitment. Any advice?

I'm afraid that if I don't tell her how I feel soon, I'll be stuck in the friend zone as her sounding board for her complaints about her boyfriend.

I'll begin at the beginning. I've Known this girl for about a year and I immediately had an interest in her. I was about to ask her on a date, when a friend who had known her longer beat me to the punch. They have been dating since then and I have become good friends with both of them. Last night we got together with some other friends for dinner and had a pretty good time, except that the guy kept saying mean things and wise cracks. I defended the girl as she had done nothing to deserve the abuse. She smiled at me broadly and said "Thank you, you're going to make some girl very happy someday." Her sister then commented on what a nice guy I was and she agreed. I was helping her in the kitchen a little later while everyone else was in the living room, and as I was exiting the kitchen I could have sworn I heard her say "If you want to ask me out to a movie or something that's okay." I immediately backtracked and said "what?" her face just got red and she said "oh, never mind." A little later she had to go to the store and I offered to give her a ride. In the car we started talking, (we always found it really easy to talk to each other, like we're on the same wavelength) After a little while she asked if she could confide in me I told her she could tell me anything, and she got to talking about her boyfriend and his mother (they've become a support system for each other). she told me how unhappy she is with the way her boyfriend is and asked for advice on what to do. She also said a few times that she still loved him, but it sounded forced like she was trying to convince herself. Now I was in a conundrum. The part of me that was deeply attracted to her wanted to tell her to dump him. But I was also his friend, so I ended up telling her that she needed to do what was best for her and if she wasn't happy, she needed to find a situation where she was (very vague actually). At the end of the night she said goodbye to every body. She gave every one else a "Friend Hug", with one arm because she was holding something, and when it was my turn last she actually put down what she was holding and gave me a tight two-armed hug and then everyone dispersed and went home. Please, someone help me, I'm very confused on what I should do next. Thank you