sprocc

Okay well i just wanted to get some opinions/advice about dealing with being social around the ex... my ex and both have family who live in the same town and so over the summer break have both come home, we had a lot of dramas and words said for about a year after our break up (was very dragged out i know) but seem 2 have managed to get over that in the last 4months or so and have been acting resonably civil if we happened to see each other (which being in a city admittidly wasn't that often) anyways heres where i want the advice... Over the summer we've had more contact with each other through being at the same place/functions/gathering/sports events etc ( its a small town) totally coincidental but im never really sure how to act around him... im always nice but am never sure how far i can go as to talking to him etc as some times he's really receptive towards me and other times he'll almost completely ignore me (while still being friendly etc towards others) i know you can't talk to everyone all the time but im not sure how to take this hot and cold attitude towards what i thought was a newly found civil relationship? Does this make sense? lol im prob just reading into it too much as usual but im confused as to how 'friendly' i can act towards him... i.e i don't want to push it by talking to him too much, (which i still feel quite comfortable doing) but don't want too seem rude by ignoring him completely (which he sometimes does to me.... ) ](*,)

unfortunately yea i do....its strange though, i know im probably gonna sound like im contradicting myself but i'm finally over him to the point where i feel like im able to move on but i also feel that its a 'habit' that i havn't been able to break that i still have feelings for him.... wish i didn't but its just something i think i'll have to live with for the time being.... and yea rionmccloud its a total mind game... the song was popular about 3years ago but doesn't get played alot anymore, don't worry im not trying 2 take it as a sign or anything

wow, this is gonna sound silly i know, but the strangest thing just happened.... im sitting here in my room writing in my diary, feeling kinda down and lonely and as a result thinking of my ex-whom after a long period of no contact i saw the other day and lo and behold 'our song' comes on the radio....(an oldish song which hardly ever gets played anymore) Kinda freaked me out....

Good idea! You'll never believe it but after all that he txt me last night....... wasn't the longest convo though because he was just after a number and i didn't exactly feel the need to drag it out any longer than necessary

Thanks for the support guys But yea the break up turned out to be pretty messy - it's a very long story but the latest is that i went 3months without contacting him at the start of the year, saw him one day and then ended up in bed with him the next night..... not a good idea as we fought once again and parted on bad terms - this has happened 1 other time since then and i know theres no chance of getting back together It just makes me feel stupid because i let him use me and then i feel like crap the next day - and the thing is i know this will happen everytime! silly huh..... oh well... hopefully next time he tries to initiate something i'll be strong enough to say no but on a positive note - i didn't txt him last night!

Okay just a very brief post, mostly just to get out what im thinking! Im home alone on a friday night and feeling quite bored and of course i get the urge to txt my ex (we're in different citys at the moment so no worry here about asking him to come over - altho i doubt that he would anyway) Am really trying hard not to txt because it won't accomplish anything and have had 3weeks without talking to him so would like to keep that up but just trying to keep myself occupied here... Why is the temptation so great?! i don't even know what i'd say.... life is strange sometimes!

wow thanks guys thats some good advice, update on the situation though - he still continues to text me even though i havn't topped up my phone to reply! i just got a text poem saying bout how he was wishing on a star that i could be there with him.... so obviously i need to tell him hes coming on 2 strong but is it ok to do this over a text or should i wait till i can say to him in person?! thing is i won't be able to see him for another two weeks because of holidays.... i did want to get to know him despite his being so forward intially, and still kind of want to give him a chance but now i wonder if i'd have any time to myself if i was to continue anything on.....

im probably going to sound like im making something out of nothing but im just after some outside opinions.... so just to put everything as briefly as possible i met a guy while i was out with my friends last saturday night (5days ago for me) and had a really good time with him, he was really sweet etc etc, he gave me his phone number as he said his phone was away being fixed and wouldn't get it back till about friday, so obviously i can't txt him can i? wrong! last night (wednesday) i got a txt from him (he got my number off my ex b/f....) which is fine except then he starts talking about coming and staying with me for the night (im at my parents house and 3 an a half hrs away) and then he asks me to send him a photo of myself so he can show his flatmate what i look like and starts talking bout how he didn't think i was interested because i didn't txt him first, and just generally sounding (to me at least) quite clingy for having only met once before.... also sending hugs and kisses (xoxo) at the end of the night and then txting me again this morning (to which i didn't have enough money to reply) and then again tonight saying goodnight with more xoxo! is this to much for only having met once? im just a bit confused and slightly weirded out... if this turns into a relationship it will only be my second one so im quite new at this all, and the first one ended quite badly and i think i've changed and grown alot an am a lot more independent so not sure i can handle jumping straight into a full on relationship....

Thanks guys, that sounds like really good advice i really appreciate it i must admit im quite worried though, i just hope i can be strong enough to last the day without getting upset and maybe even enjoy myself! and hehe yea i did think about the alcohol aspect thanks locolady, and ive come to the conclusion that i don't think i'll be drinking anything stronger than coke! wish me luck

Hey, im just basically looking for some advice and/or support as to a wee situation i have to deal with in a few days! so here it is - my ex and i have both been invited to a 'going away' party by a mutual friend, although i must admit she is more his friend than mine, i still consider her a good friend of mine. but anyway heres the problem - i've just been told that he's bringing his new girlfriend i know this girl, not very well but we've talked politely a few times and i guess im just scared of how things are going to be and how im going to feel being around both of them..... i can handle either my ex or his girlfriend on their own but im not sure about both at the same time and place.... i don't want it to ruin my day with friends but i have a feeling im just going to end up feeling uncomfortable and unhappy if im forced to see them together... i know i should just ignore them but i don't know how easy that will be.... any advice would be most welcome! thanks

okay fair enough yes i know i need to get on with it but how am i stalking him? i havn't talked or said or had anything to do with him for over a month until 3days ago when all i said was basically - hello, how are you?

ok i feel kinda silly for having to post this, but i can't help the way i feel and it's not good, i've been completely away from my ex b/f for over a month, no contact or anything and things had finally started to become good and exciting again - i was actually starting to enjoy life again BUT now he's come back home for the summer and just knowing he's around has got me feeling unhappy again, i didn't realise he was even home until 4 days ago when he turned up at touch where i was playing, he barely acknowledged me and didn't even mention my bday which had been only the day before, oh and he brought one of his casual sex girls along which didn't help! he came over (i was with some of our mutual friends) and i tried to be friendly to him, with hardly any reaction, so okay i know where i stand now Next part to the story is last night i got a text from 1 of his other casual sex girls, (altho this one i think they had a bit of an unofficial relationship) anyway she said she'd been talking to him and asked me how things were with him being back, and that he'd told her i was still trying to be friends with him and that he wasn't wanting the same thing and was anoyed with me, she then goes on to say that they never stopped being together like they told everyone and shes sorry if she ever lied to me about being with him! argh why would she think i'd want to know this?! she tries to come accross as being helpfull and friendly but i just feel like shes trying to shove their relationship in my face! i know i shouldn't care but being told all this has just completely put me off track with getting on with my life! i don't want to become best friends with him or anything but i would like to at least be able to say hello without having to think twice about whether i should or not?! sorry i know this post has been kinda jumping from one thing to the next but i need to get it out of my system....

sorry about the gross title, but thats basically it- im feeling really quite sick at the moment - the kind of feeling where it feels like if only i could throw up id feel a whole lot better ive tried using my fingers but i don't really know what im supose to be doing and its not working..... sorry again for the topic but any advice would be much apprieciated thanks

wow......... what can i say.... from what i've read of your posts i think it's safe to say i've been in a very similar situation all this past year.... i don't really have any advice, but i guess i just want to say how much it has helped settle my mind to know that im not the only one who has had this kind of experience with their ex..... you've practically taken the words right out of my mouth, after evey mean thing my ex has said and done i've always forgiven him thinking it was my fault anyway - he's said quite a few nasty things after i've gotten a bit upset trying to talk to him and so forth, (but he somehow always manages to forgive me long enough to sleep with me a few weeks later.... stupid of me i know but i still do care for him alot even though i know i shouldn't) anyway i kind of want to go into more detail because what im saying probably doesn't make much sense (its quite early in the morning where i am) but that might take a while and this post isn't really supose to be about me! lol (FYI -my story as all over the place in various posts) but right now im kind of in limbo and i worry all the time about exactly what you've said - but i guess only time will tell.... it's my birthday in a month and i wonder if he'll contact me in anyway to say happy birthday.... silly huh but whether we talk again is really up to him now, im kind of at the stage where i've realised my behaviour towards him and whats been going on has got to stop and even though i don't want to leave our relationship on a sour note i think i've pushed him so far that there's nothing i can do to make ammends until he forgives me enough to talk to me again.... sorry if this all seems like a whole lot of babble, my minds in a bit of a jumble at the moment

sorry, that was a stupid question, im just hurting (emotionally) so much right now i can't stand to go to work or do anything that i would usually do and the cutting just isn't helping tonight..... i just need to find another way out (yes i guess it's running away in a sense but i don't care)