Emailed the ex and got an interesting reply

Asked the general BS how she was doing etc. then asked that we could have a drink together sometime or that I could call. She rerplied that right now is not good and that "we need a bit more time." And that she started seeing someone and "right now hold off on the phone call". She was going out to lunch but said she would like to catch up and chat.

Maybe it's just benign but I wanted to see what her reaction would be and I totally expected her to say bug off as I knew she started seeing someone else recently. But knowing her as I do she seems still open to future options.

Umm, I think she was saying bug off. She was being nice about it, but bug off is bug off, you know?

Well from her response, it seems like she is trying to get over you, but wants to catch up and see how things are going with you.

If she told you that she still needs time and she has started seeing someone, then chances are she isn't really interested in getting into a relationship with you.

She said she still needed time and to not call her yet. So respect that and wait for when she feels that the time is right.

Oh, she's definitly interested in seeing me again.. The whole time thing goes back to conversations we had about her fear of commitment and needing time to get past her wanting to get out and date etc. She asked a while ago that I give her time, that she woukld like nothing better that to meet me again in a year, that we cannot have a life together until we get through our issues right now. The new guy? Says it is nothing serious and no commitment!

Leave this one alone. Let her go, learn from this situation and move on.

Oh, she's definitly interested in seeing me again.. The whole time thing goes back to conversations we had about her fear of commitment and needing time to get past her wanting to get out and date etc. She asked a while ago that I give her time, that she woukld like nothing better that to meet me again in a year, that we cannot have a life together until we get through our issues right now. The new guy? Says it is nothing serious and no commitment!

Not to be a cynic...but that is something you hear OFTEN from girls and guys. Thing is they may very well mean it at the time, but does not mean they won't get very involved with someone else and tell him the same thing. It may be as they are just too young, unsure what they want yet, or you just are not the one.

Don't let her keep you on the backburner like that - she may come back, she may not, but you need to be okay with it either way, rather than analyzing a small little email message like that for clues.

The thing is if someone is worth it, you work through those "issues" together, you don't run away. She ran. Does not make her bad, but means you need to move on and stop believing that she wants to work things out with you again. Because the chances are greater in the end it won't happen.

This chick is fire. DO NOT PLAY with fire. She's done with you . . .she's just being nice by saying "now is not a good time, but later." Zippo, nada, finito. She's done (for now at least). You should be too. Like others said, move forward with your life.

I'm curious why you wanted to email her in the first place. Are you interested in getting back with her? Did you want to hear it from her about the new guy?

It does seem like the relationship is over for her, based on her response.

She may say that her relationship with this other guy is nothing serious and there's no commitment, but anything can change in a year.

Maybe she will meet someone new, maybe something serious will happen with this new guy.

She says she needs time before seeing you again. Give her that time. Don't expect her to come back to you wanting a relationship though. Anything can happen.

I think you need to try getting over her. Maybe you will meet someone new. Who knows what could happen, but you need to realize that she might not want a relationship with you.

I asked her to go out for a drink or that I could call or come visit her at work. She replied that we need to give it more time before we can do that. And that she would like to keep in touch with me.

The email was a condensation of several that we exchanged today.

basically I asked if we could go out or talk. She replied she's into it and needs more time. I asked if we should keep in touch she said that is fine. I made it clear that I did not want to interfere with her situation and that I would only see her if she was not attached.

To be honest I am kinda disappointed because if she would have sent this to an ex while I was dating her I would have been pissed. To me it seems that she is not very committed to the guiy she is with. To even entertain anything with me.

Oh, and she is usuaully pretty straight up in dealing with stuff. So if she was objercting to ever seeing me on a romantic basis she would have masde that clear.

But I think I will pass on her. Too much issues buried I think..

I'm curious why you wanted to email her in the first place. Are you interested in getting back with her? Did you want to hear it from her about the new guy?

 

It does seem like the relationship is over for her, based on her response.

I miss her al ot. And she likes to hear about me though our mutaul friends. So there's more to it than what I can convey in a few paragraphs.

Boiled down, yes she ran. But I can tell from her prose that she is thinking of me.

To me it seems that she is not very committed to the guiy she is with. To even entertain anything with me.

Don't you think that thought applies in reverse, as well? If she were really interested in being with you, she wouldn't be going with another guy.

But I think I will pass on her. Too much issues buried I think.

*Now* you have the right idea.