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I'm asking this question on behalf of my friend. Maybe he'll shut up if I can get him some answers. No, this is not one of those coverup things that make it look like i'm trying to help a friend when i'm trying to really get help for myself.

 

Here's the deal...

I'm not really "experienced" with girls that much. I'm not gay, bi, none of that. Totally straight. I just live in a family that forbids dating until 18. I'm currently 15.

 

Anyway...

 

My friend likes this girl at school. Quite a bit it seems. Keeps telling me about her every few minutes. Everyday is the same thing... "I like *****"..."I like *****"... You know?

Well... it seems that this girl he likes has been single for her whole life, and about the time my friend starts getting the hots for this girl, someone sends her a "secret admirer" boquet of roses.

 

Hmmmm...

 

He's a bit stressed out now. Starting talk like "Everyone would live better if I was gone", and "I'm gonna go home and kill my self" and stuff.

I watched a movie... Left Behind 2? and got an idea on how to talk him out of the suicide thing and it seemed to work, but he's still depressed about not being able to pick up this one chick.

 

I had to let him down friday when he came up with the "genious" idea of me looking back at her in science class and then turning around and saying loudly to him "Who? *****?"

I told him the risks that were involved with that, and he backed off, but seemed very mad. That's understandable.

 

I don't know what to do... I'm all out of ideas. This girl seems to not have any intrest in him, yet he still pursues her like she's a goal in his life or something.

 

Any ideas?

All suggestions and ideas appreciated.

 

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Hmm. this is a very interesting post you have. First, even though you are unexperienced with girls, I like how you have your head on straight. In other words, its good that you know the consequences of shouting out her name like that. She could think that he is making fun of her or something. Besides, it is an immature gesture on his part and she will recognize that.

I think that your friend has deeper issues if he is seriously considering suicide over this. I don't know your friend so I dunno how serious he is about this but sometimes people just say it to either get attention or just prove how frustrating it is but never go through with it. If you thik he would actually go through with this then there are definitely problems that you may not even be aware of.

Try talking to your friend to see what is going on with him. See if he can understand that death is not romantic and how permanent it is. Try to tell him how not every girl he has his eye on will feel the same. That a big part of life is getting rejected. I dont know if that will help but it is something that he will need to learn to grasp. maybe you could talk to the girl and pick up a friendship with her. The both of you to do so. Then maybe she will form an interest in him but if not, at least you guys got a new friend. You cant force her to like him or anything. But if for any reason she becomes interested in you, try to brush it off like you dont care about it so you dont hurt your friend.

I know that I didn't give very much advice here, but I think it would be better for your friend to sign up on the site so we can get his perspectie on this and find out what is really going on with him. Its sorta hard to give advise to a third party. Maybe you can mention this site to him and see how he feels about it. If not, I hope everything works out in any case...

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I don't think he's serious about the suicide thing... Like you said, It's probably some plan he's devised to get attention. He's said many things that he would almost swear about, then never do. Same here too, but I try to do something if I say I'm going to do it...

 

I've already talked to him for a little at school, and alot online though MSN Messenger about how he can kick, and scream, and trash everything in his house, but nothing is going to help him, and suicide should he completely scratched off his list. That's a no go.

 

Oh, and if you don't mind, I've got a small question for myself...

I've got a small problem with cursing. I've trained myself not to use it at home, or around my teachers, but I'm afraid that I might be using it around some of the girls that I personally think have the hots for me. Should I try to cut the cursing thing all together, or just wave everything and go on with my life?

Thanks

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well, regarding the cursing, you can look at it in two ways...one, you are yourself and anyone who is uncomfortable with you can either accept you...or not. And two, if you dont like that quality about yourself, you can change it.

From my experience, I have learned that the less you use profanity, the more respect you gget. Not to say that you cant use it at all because some situations just call for it. but use everything in moderation...that goes for a lot of thing...drugss, alcohol, food, anything, but it also includes cursing. The more cursing you use, the less intelligent....err...uneducated you look. Girls like a guy to be respectful, but have a bad boy side to them as well. So, like I said before, try not to use it compulsively or too much, but just when it is needed and you can't think of another word to use that would get the same message accross. Try to find a happy medium...not too much but not nothing....I hope that all made sense

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