I am overreacting or he is shallow

Hello,

I met this guy in online dating, just talking for a bit and he seems nice. He asked me to do a videocall before we meet in real life (don't know the reason, but I told him I could go for a cup of coffee and we both have enough pictures there). He is not very interested asking about my life just the normal things like living, studying and maybe this is right, since a videocall could help to talk and why would we spend time on texting. We arranged even the time of videocalling.

But then before doing the videocall, talking about movies etc, and with who do we live he talked about how we could both watch movies alone in his flat since he has a flat for himself, and put some laughing at the end.

I am pretty strict in these things and I find this conversation very shallow (and also putting these laughing at the end bothers me so much) before you even know a person. So I told him there won't be any videocall cause I could not fix my pc (a bit rude this one and it is obvious that it is not a pc problem but I just got scared of this conversations talking about doing things alone home before even know each other). He just responded an ok.

And I see that he has selfesteem and didnt bothered me anymore.

Do you too find it shallow to mention things that way, or did I overreact and should I talk to him again and say that I overreacted but maybe we can give another chance to the conversation?

Is the goose cooked right now? I ma just a bit attracted to him cause different from other people he doesnt bother too much but goes straight to the point by arranging a videocall and maybe texting is not the best way to talk to get to know people.

It's not about shallow at all. It's about values. He apparently values and justifies talking to strangers he's never met with sexual suggestiveness - if you were a woman who was looking for a sexual arrangement you would be fine with and welcome his suggestions about movies at his place (and if you were willing to take the huge safety risk of going to someone's apartment who is a stranger, for some that would be outweighed by the benefit of a hook up with someone whose photos they found appealing and if they were horny and enjoyed sex with strangers). You are not that person. You want to go on proper dates with someone and get to know them before having sex or going to their home or having him come to yours. He is making it clear from the get go what he is looking for. It's not wrong or shallow on his part at all. It's just not right for you.

It's not about shallow at all. It's about values. He apparently values and justifies talking to strangers he's never met with sexual suggestiveness - if you were a woman who was looking for a sexual arrangement you would be fine with and welcome his suggestions about movies at his place (and if you were willing to take the huge safety risk of going to someone's apartment who is a stranger, for some that would be outweighed by the benefit of a hook up with someone whose photos they found appealing and if they were horny and enjoyed sex with strangers). You are not that person. You want to go on proper dates with someone and get to know them before having sex or going to their home or having him come to yours. He is making it clear from the get go what he is looking for. It's not wrong or shallow on his part at all. It's just not right for you.

Actually I dont know it is not that he asked for this. He just mentioned it, but his idea is to make a videocall before we even go out.

He wants a booty call. He is not interested in you, either.

You are putting in way too much energy into a stranger. Move on.

Actually I dont know it is not that he asked for this. He just mentioned it, but his idea is to make a videocall before we even go out.

He only wants sex from you. he doesn't have to spell it out.

How old are you? You posted yesterday.

Honey he's looking to get laid. He's not interested in watching a movie! Dont fall for this.

Actually I dont know it is not that he asked for this. He just mentioned it, but his idea is to make a videocall before we even go out.

I bet a video call would lead to him trying to get you to take your clothes off and give him a good look at your naked body. He sounds like a creep. Move on, there's plenty of nice guys out there.

Actually I dont know it is not that he asked for this. He just mentioned it, but his idea is to make a videocall before we even go out.

Really strange that that’s all you took from what I wrote. More to this story - my guess is you’re feeling a bit desperate to meet someone. And that’s how people get themselves into awkward or even dangerous situations with people they meet through on line sites or at a bar etc.

Trust your gut instinct of feeling bad about his statements, etc. Don't second guess yourself because you're lonely and want a male companion. Keep cutting the losers loose in order to be single when you stick to your standards to find a decent one.

You posted yesterday this same question.

He wants you to come over to "watch a movie ", code for sex. If you aren't interested in casual sex then just stop talking to him. Simple.

Why are you looking for justification of this man's attempts to ask for sex before even meeting for the first time? It's pretty clear he is looking for a booty call. You can't change what he's out for, so if that's not what you want, move on. Analyzing the guy to no end will not change the reality of the situation.