How do you reconcile with an ex who’s blocked you?

My ex broke up with me four months ago. We’d been dating for almost a year. I really loved him, but the end of the relationship took a negative turn. I didn’t handle the breakup well at all and made a bunch of mistakes (begged, pleaded, crazy stuff like that.) My ex got a new “gf” 3 weeks after we broke up. From what I hear they aren’t exactly serious. I don't know how to contact him because he blocked me on everything shortly after he broke up with me. I really miss him and have been thinking about this for a while. I feel like I’ve changed in a positive way. In the end, I’d be fine with or without him because life goes on, but I really truly do want him back. How do I get someone back who I can’t talk to? Please don’t say “just move on” because I’m not going down without a fight.

They blocked you means leave me alone. You don’t want a restraining order.

Reconciliation only happens when both people want to reconcile.

You cannot "fight" someone into loving you or wanting to be with you.

I understand, this hurts. But insisting on "fighting" for someone who doesn't feel the same will just make the pain worse. It hurts more to keep getting rejected over and over.

Take care of yourself.

Unfortunately, you have to wait it out in my opinion.

If you acted a little crazy during the breakup, the only way to show you are not crazy is by... not being crazy. Anything you do to try to circumvent the block is going to make you look even crazier.

In addition, this will likely prompt him to talk to his girlfriend about whatever stunt you pull to get in touch with him - and really - nothing drives people closer together than having a common “enemy”. So what you could end up doing by trying to get him back is actually push him further into her arms.

It has to come from him. Statistically, the relationship likely won’t last (most don’t). When they eventually naturally breakup, he may think of you and unblock you/reach out. It has to be his idea. Once he opens the door in that way, you will be in a better position to try to win him back.

Grace20201, you just might perhaps be in denial. I was there once so I know. The problem is they blocked us. When someone blocks you that means they don't want you in their life. Period. No matter what you say or do it simply won't work. The only chance you have is allowing him space and maybe, just maybe, down the line, he will reach out to you. Until then please do NOT reach out to him. You have the "I'm gonna save this no matter what" will only further push him away. Please believe me. I'be been there, done that and it simply doesn't work. You will be in much more pain when he rejects you again. Just let him come to you. This is your ONLY option. Until then do your best to move on. It's going to hurt like hell but you have no choice. WE have no choice. I say WE because what you're going through has happened to us too.

You're in the bargaining phase of processing. It's my worst and most persistent phase when dealing with breakups, so trust me when I say my comment does not come from a judgmental place. In many ways, your desire to "fight" makes us kindred spirits.

However, the tough lesson is that you can't make someone talk to you, miss you, or come back. Those desires and emotions are internal. He got to the point where he completely removed you from his life. I hate to say it, but it's likely over for good.

If you're wondering why he's bouncing back quickly, it's because he found an emotional airbag in the form of a girl he doesn't care much about (at least according to your comments on them not being serious). However, even if he leaves her, he likely won't be flying to you.

It will be extremely painful to accept the end of the relationship fully. He did you a favor, though. Now you're spared from actively obsessing over his social media accounts and comparing yourself to the new girl and/or the next relationship you get into with the one he's in. You may not appreciate it now, but one day when your head is clear, you will.

Good luck with your healing. This community will help you find your way if you listen to the advice given.

Honestly, move on. I know it's hard to hear. But I am just healing from a breakup 5 months ago. It hurts like hell. I'd ask more questions around why you want to be with someone who doesn't want you for whatever reason. It's like swimming against the current. Take the path of least resistance. And move on

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You can't contact him if he's blocked you, OP.

If he doesn't unblock you, you have to assume he's not interested. You can fight until you're blue in the face but it won't change anything if he doesn't feel the same way about you.

I would delve a little further into why you two broke up in the first place. Were you possessive or controlling. I’m just assuming here,

but perhaps do some more reflecting about your part in the breakup. Concentrate on those areas and learn from it. Be a happy person. Live life. There is nothing more attractive than a person who is happy and enjoying life. Down the track, if the planets align and you have healed and learned more about yourself you will seem more attractive to him.

He blocked you? Okay then.

Reconcile with YOURSELF. Not with him. Then move on.

How do I get someone back who I can’t talk to? Please don’t say “just move on” because I’m not going down without a fight.

You already tried to put up a fight and it backfired. Let time run its course and work on "yourself". If you keep doing so it will push him further away and eliminate the tiniest chance of reconciliation. You said his current relationship isn't "serious" so wait it out then. Give him some time and space and he might see things a little different after all the emotions settled down, however, DO NOT wait for him. Time is the most precious commodity on earth, use it wisely.

In my opinion, people always underestimate the power of time and No Contact. Have faith in these tools.