Should I give him another chance?

We were together for about a year and it was discovered that he was seeing another woman, we addressed all the reasons why he done what he did, no sexual activity was involved and it went on for 2 weeks. He stated that because we were arguing a lot more than usual that he gave in to attention elsewhere. 7 months down the line and I feel like he has matured so much and he is making such an effort to win me back. We tried seeing each other again a couple of months ago after not speaking since the break up but I wasn't ready to start that process with him and he was gutted. Once again we stopped speaking for months and then one random day started again and met up and we have started spending a lot of time together again. We seem to fall back in to it every time we see each other. Yes he hurt me but I believed he was the one and still do, I look at him now and everything that happened I've learnt to block out and see the boy I fell in love with. I can look at him now and see a future with him, never has a boy made me feel so special and loved as he does. He still does drop every thing to do whatever makes me happy and if I need him he's there. He is my best friend and I am still in love with him. I believe he is genuinely sorry and he is proving that and is willing to do everything at my pace. He is the only person I have been with to make me so happy and when I am around him I'm always in such a good mood and my family say that when he is around in my life I am a better person. I've dated since him and no one has compared to him and how he makes me feel. My family adore him and think he made an honest mistake and should try again, I don't believe he would go to so much effort if he thought he could betray me again. My heart says to try again but I know my close friends would not agree and call me a fool. Should I take the risk again?

This is something that you'll have to decide for yourself. Remember that it's entirely possible that the ex hasn't changed at all and if he has that he will revert back to his old self. Why don't you take it slow and go out on dates and keep it fun before diving into a "we are a duo" mentality

Just tread lightly.

He stated that because we were arguing a lot more than usual that he gave in to attention elsewhere.

Based on the reason that he gave you, there is a risk that he will cheat again if you two run into a difficult patch again and can' t agree on things. Has he learned to handle disagreements more constructively? All relationships have disagreements. Have you two addressed this problem? How can you be sure that he's changed? Right now, he is on his very best behavior because he wants what he can't have and thus you are having a second 'honeymoon' period. What happens though when things turn back to being "mundane"? You don't state your ages. Was this his first relationship? If he is very young and inexperienced with regards to relationships, I guess you could give him a second chance to see whether he has really learned from it and changed, so that you are not left with "what ifs" in your mind. However, you need to go into this with open eyes, knowing that he may do it again. The trouble with these situations is that once they do it to you once and you take them back, it gets easier for them to do it to you again. It's like a boundary has been broken. Sadly many people have trouble learning their lesson if they manage to avoid consequences. Can you take the risk? Can you handle having it happen a second time? If yes, by all means try again.

Life is too short to have to live in constant worry or anxiety. Also, as of 2014 there are over 3 billion men in this world. Now, I don't know how they equates to single men in your region and or age bracket.

But my point is, if there are that many men out there, do you think ONE of those men is willing to treat you how you should be treated AND respect your boundaries? All you need is one.

Just something to think about. Good luck.

Go for it.

Feel out if he actually matured, but if you love him, go for it. 100%.

You don't state your ages. Was this his first relationship? If he is very young and inexperienced with regards to relationships, I guess you could give him a second chance

We are 19 years old and I was his first love, my first love before him also cheated but we never bothered to give another try because he didn't make me happy throughout and we clashed personality wise, there was nothing to fight for. Whereas with him I feel like there is and we do make such a good team which is why I would find it very hard to let go, I don't think I would ever want to be without him in life in some way, but I don't think I could be just friends because when we've tried that we always happen to come back together.

Hmm, I say since you're both young why not try again. But you do need to talk about how you're going to address disagreements and what you will each do should things start to get tough again. And I'd have that talk before agreeing to take him back then see how it goes. It may be the guy was just sort of clueless or it may be a pattern, but you have no way of knowing that and honestly he's young enough he probably doesn't either.

Good communication and the ability to handle rough patches make up a huge percentage of whether or not a relationship will last. All you can do is toss your hat into the ring, so to speak and see where it takes you at this stage of the game. Twenty years from now if that's how a guy handles a rough patch in a relationship then I'd say run, but here your'e both so young it might not happen again.

Just talk to him ahead of time, see if you can't both work out how you'll keep boundaries with others even in spite of difficulties and try again. Good luck.

I'd probably have difficulty trusting him, and I wouldn't want to set myself up to walk on eggshells 'around' issues in fear of him turning disloyal again every time we have difficulty.

You get to do whatever you want, but consider whether it would actually make you happy once the goal of getting him back is won.