waffle

Me too! Ten years (ish), although the circumstances were/are different. The relationship was brief, but still I fell HARD. He basically pulled a fade on me and broke my heart -- I had been with my xH for 25 years so I didn't realize how this dating thing worked anymore. We did, however, meet up for lunch maybe a year later and the connection was gone. To this day I miss the conversations we used to have, and his unique viewpoint on the world and social issues, politics, history, etc. I had hoped to have the sort of post-relationship relationship with him where we could get together once a year or so to catch up, but I guess he didn't want that with me. My life (and my self as a whole) has changed SO much in that time, and I have reason to believe his has too. But I'm not sure how I would reach out without it looking like I'm sniffing around. Which I'm not, I'm very happily involved with someone else. He did call me a maybe a year or so after I last saw him but I was on a date and I let the call go to VM, which he didn't leave. I never called him back, and that was it. Mostly I'd just like to show him that I moved on from him just fine. 🙂

I get what OP is saying. I think it IS odd to never get male attention.

What is it about her that made her "exactly your type"?

When you finally meet a guy who's all in with you and wants a future with you, he will not say the above. He will be clear with you in what he wants, and he will share with you how he plans to get there (and it won't be the way-too- early fake future talk). He won't risk losing you to someone else while he monkeys around making excuses and playing footsies with exes. And you will wonder why you ever wasted time and energy on guys like this one.

We all have our kinks. Not hurting anyone, I don't see anything wrong.

I don't think people (read: men, since they are the main consumers of porn) realize how it alters your perception of a healthy sex life. I cringe every time I read how "normal" it is to watch. It may be common, but that doesn't mean it is "normal." Far from it.

OP, all that talk before you meet i.e. you're amazing, I miss you, can't wait to see you, is all fake. It's fantasy, not real. So expecting him to continue it when things get real (when you meet) is just not realistic.

This is not rocket science. When he found out you weren't going to be funding all of the dates, he figured there was no use sticking around.

lol How many times do we read here where a guy says I met this woman and she's great in every way but I'm not attracted and everyone says oh, not attracted? you cut her loose then. Same situation here. OP wants a man with the means to treat her well, not give his money to everyone else in his life and then cry broke to her. Nope. Nothing wrong with being attracted to a man with means.

False. I've done it. And more than once. In fact, the (admittedly few) times I was instantly attracted to someone, it was very short-lived and burned out quickly.

What could possibly go wrong?

Virtually everyone does. If you watch enough movies you'll soon find out nothing is more important than attraction.

You did things in the wrong order. Marriage first, then house. You can get out of it though . . . houses are sold all the time. You can sell yours.

Or bigger.

Anxiously waiting by my inbox.