The Highs and Lows of a Long Distance Relationship: Going to College & Staying Together

People often think that long-distance relationships can’t work out, especially when one person is headed off to college while the other remains in high school, but the truth is that distance between the two partners doesn’t signify an impending failed relationship. Although maintaining such a relationship while so far apart can be difficult, it is possible with the right guidelines balancing the stresses of college life, working through communication issues, and understanding each others’ feelings.

The first major issue to tackle is time management. With classes and studying taking up most of your day, how will you find time to connect with each other? It’s important for both of you to create a realistic schedule that allows you to both spend quality time together if possible. Maybe you text often throughout the day or video chat a few times a week. No matter the frequency, it’s best to come up with a plan that feels like a realistic goal and one that won’t add extra stress and expectations to either person.

Second, you have to remember that college life and high school life are different universes. Each partner needs to understand and respect where the other is coming from and realize that the stresses, temptations, and expectations will be more for one than the other. College tends to bring about more partying and being able to feel like an adult, whereas in high school you often still have to fight for independence. Hostility and negative criticism from either partner is never helpful and can ruin any potential progress that could have been made in resolving disagreements.

As for communication, nothing will ever be perfect. Feelings can often be misinterpreted and discussions can get heated. The key here is to remember what it was that brought you two together in the first place, even if things are looking tough. The beauty of a true relationship is being able to talk through things and not let fleeting moments of emotion override your connection. It may be difficult at first, but heartfelt conversations will lead to greater understanding and admiration.

It’s also essential that you both value honesty and trust above all else. That is truly the cornerstone during such a tumultuous period in your relationship. As much as you should be honest with each other, accepting the truth can be challenging. You both need to be patient and believe that it’s worth going through the crying, misunderstandings, and even breakups in order to move forward and make the relationship stronger.

Finally, know that although this experience can be incredibly rewarding, it also takes a lot of courage and hard work from both sides. Distance won’t seem like it’s getting in the way once you both look back on these years and talk about how strong your relationship became despite the challenges. By not giving up and staying the course, you will come out more connected than ever before.

It’s important to take some time to reflect on what’s been going on between you both and figure out a path that makes sense for your unique situation. Never let the distance or the opinion of others stop you from dedicating yourself to the one you love. You can make it happen, but you must keep going despite the highs and lows.